I'm 24 and never have seen the ocean. I've only been about 200 miles away from my hometown, which is in the center of the heartland. I am married with a 3 year old, 1 year old, and a 2 month old. My husband wants to take me to the ocean, but I want to leave the kids at home where he doesn't. Am I being selfish? I have always wanted to see the ocean, and would like to do this for me. I have always pictured myself running on the beach with the sand between my toes and touching that water for the first time as the sun is setting. I want it to be romantic and intimate. I love my three kids, and I will take them to the ocean one day when they can remember every detail. Again, am I wrong and selfish for wanting to leave my kids or should I do this for me? or can I have both. Please give me some input. Thank You
2007-03-24 15:27:40 · 18 answers · asked by sly65sally200 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Yes, I think you are. You are young at 24 but are a married woman with a husband and 3 kids. I'm sorry you didn't have the chance when you were still just with your husband to fullfil your dream of a beach getaway, but guess what? With your own family already established, you have to make concessions. I think, you are placing way too much importance on your beach dream.
With that said, every one of us have needs and wants. If this is truely what you must have, why don't you do both? One getaway for just two of you, and another for the family? Have a talk with your husband to see if you can make this happen.
By the way, 1 year old and 2 month old may be a bit too young to expose them to the open beach environment - sand, ultra-strong sun light, etc. Why don't you wait until they can at least walk steadily on their own to take them to beach? (for their own safety if nothing else)
2007-03-24 15:41:12 · answer #1 · answered by tkquestion 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm not really sure where you could find a beach quiet and private enough to be all "romantic and intimate" like in the movies, but it's worth trying...
No, I don't think that's selfish of you. You gave up SO MUCH of your individual freedom and dreams by marrying so young and popping out baby after baby after baby; why shouldn't you take this rare chance when you get it??
I'd tell your husband you deserve a break, and some time together without the kids (even if the beach is packed with other people's screaming kids...)
2007-03-24 22:32:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
They ARE to young to remember it. Your right. Explain to the husband all the sand they will try to eat, how their young skin is more prone to burn, and you want to be able to stay longer than what you would be able to if you have the kids. Tell him every reason you told us too. But most of all tell him how you want sex on the beach! Sex always gets em! LOL Tell him when they are old enough you could all go to Disney. That kids are hell to travel w/ especially when that young! I hope you get your way. L
There are natural beaches that are usually more private. Do some research and you'll find them!
2007-03-24 22:35:40 · answer #3 · answered by LUCY 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes it is selfish of you . i have lived near the ocean my whole life and while in the NAVY i was on an aircraft carrier , it bothers you that you've never been to the ocean .so you should want your whole family to have an opportunity to enjoy the beach ..... SHARE THE BEACH WITH YOUR FAMILY..why should they have to wait 24 years to see it . how many times will you and your kids feel the same way for the first time together. enjoy
2007-03-24 22:39:46 · answer #4 · answered by john b 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you're not selfish. It sounds a lot like you're feeling overwhelmed by the kids. You should probably explain this to your husband. Perhaps if he understood your feelings, and that this has been a long time dream for you, he might be more willing to agree to do this without the kids.
2007-03-24 23:31:25 · answer #5 · answered by stedh1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have someone you totally trust to care for the children, by all means go without them. Not only do you need a break, at their ages, they will be better off not going. If you feel guilty, take them to the park or something close to home. They will enjoy that more and will not tire them(or you) as much. We all need time to unwind and be with our husbands.
2007-03-24 22:37:45 · answer #6 · answered by DOT 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No its okay to just go out with you and your husband for a change.
Parents need space too.
You just have to make sure that the kids are safe with a good baby-sitter and just do what a good mother would do.
You and your husband should have more time together so that your relationship doesnt fall apart...for the kids.
2007-03-24 22:36:59 · answer #7 · answered by Just Me 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Heck no, it's not selfish. You deserve a break. You're right, you can take your kids when they will remember it! You will spend so much time chasing them that you won't be able to enjoy yourself. Leave them home for now, don't feel guilty, and have fun! You won't regret it! Good Luck! And, if you want to see a beautiful beach, go to Panama City Beach!
2007-03-24 22:32:08 · answer #8 · answered by Boots 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your kids are still young enough that so long as you leave them with a proper care giver they won't even really know what they are missing. In the meantime you and your husband might benefit from a little one on one time. You can take the kids next time. (and you should!)
2007-03-24 22:31:45 · answer #9 · answered by danl747 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you are beign selfish. I dont have kids but my sister does so i have an idea how tough it is to raise three of them. it does make sense to me to wait and take them when they are older so they will remember it. Maybe you need to go without the husband to.
2007-03-24 22:32:47 · answer #10 · answered by rparks_57070 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋