What should i do ?

Question

my boyfriend smokes and he knows i dont like it, it makes me choke =[ he keeps saying he will stop and then he goes and does it behind my back but at the same time i dont want him 2 think im trying to control his life what should i do ? please help =[

Answer 1

Hello,

Smoking is very addictive, like alcohol. Our bodies crave it and will nag us for the next "fix". Even our loved ones seem to become "second" to the addiction. It's a sad thing, but too often true. Perhaps if you took the pressure off and ask him to smoke outside as a favor to you. You could suggest, ever so gently, that you love being with him all the time, but when he smokes you seem to be allergic...no one's fault...just allergic. At this time you could suggest that he keep his smoke away from you! Then thank him (sincerely) for everytime he remembers!! Let him know that you appreciate his thoughtfulness. What a great guy! Also keep breath mints handy for both of you! Smokers breath can be a real turn off! :-) Good luck!

Answer 2

you have to decide if smoking is a deal-breaker for you or not. accept the fact that he may NEVER quit. can you accept living with him under those circumstances? nagging for the next 50 years won't work.

we each have to live our lives in a way that makes sense to us. right now, smoking works for him and your protests don't. he could quit someday - or not. if you don't want to live with that prospect, then it's bye-bye and you'll look for a non-smoker in the future. good luck.