what would you do in my situation?

Question

I have been emotionally,physically,sexually abused and neglected/abandond .I've been through foster care and my son was tooken from me when he was 3 months old by foster care, he is now almost 2, I've been fighting for him for a year and still no luck, my family wants nothing to do with me and hasnt since I was around 12-13yrs old. I'm 18 now. I have 1 friend that has been there since I've been 11. and my boyfriend and his family. I've changed alot and done everything I could but it seems nothing is good enough anymore. should I just give up or do I keep trying. I just want to runaway without telling anyone and start over. but should i go back to my same old ways or keep fighting.Has anyone been through this and if so can you give me your advice on what I should do

Answer 1

I too was abused sexually and seen my father abuse my mother and brothers and sisters... it was horrible..... The one thing true in my life is GOD.... with out going to church and having friends in that atmosphere, I would still be hooked on drugs and would be a nothing. I had 2 abortions, was into drugs and didn't care who I stole from...but I was able to rise above all that, I changed my life, made myself into an honest person, started counseling teens, went to college, found out I was smart and something to offer people.

I now have a son, husband, own 2 businesses, nice house, cool car, horses and have a wonderful,drug free life.............. and that is something NO ONE can take away.

Keep fighting for your child. Start going to church, pray and learn about God. Do what ever you have to do..... just keep your cool, jump through hoops... show them that you are serious and that you are somebody. what happened to you when you were young is in your past, you learned from it and you are a better person for it. God bless you, and good luck. And I am not kidding, there is great salvation in God.... its wonderful and you will find peace in your heart!!

Answer 2

Fight! Fight against your old self first. Fight to get back your self respect and then fight against your own wanting to give up. If you have really changed in your heart-of-hearts then truth is on your side and truth always wins. Fight with serenity and total calmness. Fight with logic. Fight with confidence because you know you have crossed over into a creative, caring person if indeed you really have, and you are the only one who knows if that is true. Nobody else does. Your actions are the only things that will make a difference in how everyone else sees you. Don't fight with fighting words, they only muddy the waters of communication. Fight with love and tenderness where there might have been none before and if your tenderness is not received well at first, fight the temptation to strike back. Define what has restricted you and then fight that. Under no circumstance allow any violence that has driven you down in the past to become part of your future. What has been done is done. Live your life in the now because now IS your future.

Answer 3

The first thing I would do is send a letter to my parents and tell them how very supportive they are being for their own daughter and how they should feel guilty. Then say since they don't want anything to do with you, you don't want to ever be reminded by their irresponsible actions as parents and you are disgusted.
Your son will most likely having a hard time growing up without his true biological mother, thinking you abandoned him. Now that you're 18, you should be able to get your son back. You're a responsible adult, and they should give back your child. Try your hardest and don't give up. Life is a bumpy road for all of us.

Answer 4

Keep fighting princess!!!! WOW! you have been through it all. I would suggest talking with a couselor or somebody you can really trust. It would be a good idea to take some parenting classes and get a job while your fighting. Remeber to take care of yourself physically and mentally so when the time is right, you will be able to be a great mom to your baby. It's never to late.....keep trying and remember everyone around you is not going to hurt you.......try to trust.
There are people praying for you and your situation. BEST OF LUCK to you and your baby

Answer 5

I have had all the abuse you are talking about I have never been in foster care or lost a child to the system. But I think if you want your child back you fight until there is no more to be done. Do what you need to do for yourself too. Who cares what everone else thinks be true to yourself work hard. make a good life for yourself you deserve it.

Answer 6

You just have to keep trying and never give up and i know that it is easy for me to write; as I'm not in your shoes and don't know your predicament. You mention of having a friend since you were 11, and your boyfriend and his family as well.

Things to me would have been worse if there was not some one like those people you mention like a ( Light House ) being there for you as a source of refuge and comfort. With those things you mention going for you like those people in your life; why run away to a life and situation you may be know nothing of what is waiting for you out there ?

If you fall back into your (old ways ) that is what a lot of people will like to see happen to you and that to me is no way to go. I have not been in a situation like yours and hope that i was able to be a source of wisdom with what i wrote.

Answer 7

Counseling. And ask yourself if you are able to take care of your child or is he going to have a better life elsewhere. Make sure you have your life together before you make any rash decisions. Financially - could your really run away? It sounds as though you need to find some people to trust. A church community could really help you out - in many different ways.

Answer 8

Might sound crazy but try joining something like job core, or talk to a recuirter about joining the military (specifally the Air Force). all you need is to test average on a military test and have a GED or high school diploma. Free rent, food, and you get paid. something to think about. good luck, sorry to hear what happend in the past.

Answer 9

Well it depends on how stable you are in order to get your son back. And why did they take him away in the first place?If you think that he will have a good stable loving home with you, then continue fighting to get him back. What ever is best for your child!

Answer 10

wow... trully amazing story you got there. well i really don't know what to do but wow, i can't believe it. you must be one strong person to still be alive right now from this.

well, if you can't handle yourself, then you can't handle anything else, so fix yourself first then fix the rest later. if you want your son and you still care for him. you need to find a way to fix yourself, maybe you should get a job, then go to college, if somethings wrong, seek consoling.