we have both been married once....
2007-03-24 11:51:27 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
because living together may seem like your a married couple and maybe he's not ready for that yet. as much as he may love you he's not ready for the responsiblity of being a husband again.
2007-03-24 11:55:24 · answer #1 · answered by . 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Seems to me that he is happy with the present situation as it is since 2 years have gone by and is not ready for a more future commitment to you. If you are ready to settle down.....not by just living with someone.....move on. Forcing an issue like this sure isn't the answer. You don't mention ages but since married once before some of it could be the playing it safe or being on the side of caution...but for 2 years?? He should know you pretty well by now and you him.
I would step back and look at what I really wanted for MY future and not just a live in situation.
2007-03-24 12:06:59 · answer #2 · answered by Gypsygrl 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A boyfriend wouldn't want to live together after a couple years for several reasons. If you hve both been married once already there is that fer of things not working out again. Which is never easy to deal with, especially if it was a bad divorce. The best thing you can do is give him time and support his decision and he should support yours. When the timeis right you'll know. Take your time.
2007-03-24 11:59:29 · answer #3 · answered by dom_anh 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people take longer to heal from old wounds and trust again.
If you are ready for the relationship to move forward and he is not you need to evaluate if you are willing to wait for him or if you need to let him go and finish his healing and learning to trust process on his own.
Is he just waiting to be married....I know silly as it may seem in this day and age there are still men that value morality, or at least the illusion of it.
Is he committed to you?
Does he feel that you have a future together?
Does he see you getting married soon or at all?
These are all good things to talk about with him in a non-threatening and non-confrontational way.
You never want to "threaten" to leave if he doesn't commit but in the same way you don't want to continue to invest mind heart and soul in a relationship that is stagnant.
Communication is key in any relationship and you need to make sure the lines of it are open between the two of you.
2007-03-24 11:59:15 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Okay. All the obvious likely reasons have already been stated. So, I'll just add that if it's someone you like enough to want to live with, perhaps you should be asking him this question? If you do not get a straight and satisfactory answer, it's probably best you don't live with him anyway.
Also, in addition to all of the excellent possibilities, I'd like to re-iterate the one about the possible moral misgivings of living together without marriage-even in this day and age. To some of us, morality-or the lack there of as in the case of fornication-is a really big deal. Living together makes fornication (adultery) worse because it is so blatant.
Besides, some experts say that having lived together before marriage is one of the biggest indicators of a marriage likely to end in divorce.
2007-03-24 12:23:32 · answer #5 · answered by Leroy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
uh, maybe b/c that's a really big step and he's just not ready. What if he really likes you now, but is afraid if you both live together he will not have his space, and things don't end up working out at the time as far as sharing living space? What's he gonna do then, say, "Can you move out? But let's still date."
2007-03-24 11:58:37 · answer #6 · answered by HoofHearted 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's obviously not ready to take that step. He still wants to have his space and privacy. I wouldn't force it, to be honest. I know everyone makes such a fuss because they can save $, etc. but in the long run, if it is not an idea you both are crazy about, it will end up a train-wreck.
Just enjoy your privacy & independance and let him have his.
2007-03-24 11:57:29 · answer #7 · answered by Clarissa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
His marriage taught him well of what happens when 2 people live together. Sounds like he's not ready for that again.
2007-03-24 12:44:21 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am not saying this is happening to you first off......but my ex-husband will not live with his girl friend because he still has feeling for me....
.does he have children{we don't} if he does maybe that's why? or he is afraid to get into another possible mess....to have to deal with.
Men now a day...will not commit....women are finding out that men are happy alone....and want long-term relationships....not forever relationships....like us women like.
2007-03-24 12:03:44 · answer #9 · answered by Bobbie4u 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
cuz it didn't work last time
he wants his own space
he doesn't want anyone asking him to pick up his socks
he doesn't want to make room for your stuff
he doesn't want to put the toilet seat down
he wants freedom to live how he chooses
he doesn't trust you to pay your part of the bills
he doesn't like the way you keep house
he doesn't get along with your hours
he doesn't want to share the remote
he's still seeing other women
noplace to park your car
he doesn't like the food you would make him eat
but you have to ask him for his reason
then just listen understandingly
2007-03-24 11:56:19 · answer #10 · answered by Sufi 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋