do you think i should marry my turkish boyfriend?

Question

me and my turkish boyfriend have been together for a year now he really is a lovely guy he has lived in the uk for 2 years now and i know he love me to bits so do you think i should marry him by the way i'm 21 and hes 30

Answer 1

Not if he makes you iron sheets and his undies, like my aunt's Turkish boyfriend did. When she finally tried to leave him, he became violent.

Best of luck & hope this helps!!

Answer 2

only you can decide that hun , if you love him then id say yes,
but don't take this the wrong way make sure you are marring him for the write reasons my friend got married to a Turkish fella 2 yrs ago and the same as your fella had been living in the UK for 2 yrs ,(now I'm not to sure on how all the papers work ) but anyway that got married and she really thought he was the one , until his time was up with immigration , as soon as he was able to stay legal he dumped her there and then , all he wanted was the papers to stay ,
I'm not saying that your fella will do this but if you love him and he really loves you then theres no rush to get married , please don't rush into it I've seen what it did to my friend and its not very nice . take care and good luck.
theres nothing wrong with age gap your both adults im 29 and my husband is 38 so dont think it matters .

Answer 3

i guess only u know if that's the right decision or not... all we can do is point out the cultural differences, and the difficulties that might arise if u were to either go live in Turkey, where the attitude towards women is a hell of a lot different to how it is in the UK, or if u were to have children together, and how your different religions / cultures will effect your decisions on how to raise your kids..... i know u love him hon, but please, just be careful.... u read so many horror stories about how Turkish men change once u get married to them... i hope for your sake this is not the case with your relationship. and whatever happens, stay in touch with your friends and family - if anything were to go wrong, it would be helpful to u to have people to support u. good luck.

Answer 4

No. Your values and beliefs are too different. You would be living with his beliefs and values which took thousands of years to develop. You cannot hope to live with or change thousands of years worth of differences.

It's when you start to live together, you realise what you are actually in for.

In Australia, I new a turkish guy. He said that turkish girls were for marrying and Australian girls were for playing around with.

21 is too young to get married. Explore life for a few more years. Then get married to someone around your own age.

Get married in your late twenties when you have had more life experience and are able to make decisions like these with more foresight.

Answer 5

Well, I am sure he is a lovely bloke and all that but I think you really need to explore the cultural differences before you go that far. Some (not all) turkish men have very strong views on what a wife should be and they may not accord with your own views. Likewise, he may not get what a UK wifey is like. Find out more, you are very young!

Answer 6

I would be careful. I have a friend of a friend that married a Turkish guy and because of the way his culture views women, he treats her like she is his maid. Marriage can definitely change a man's attitude, so I would check into his heritage before you make any real decisions.

Answer 7

Hi,I married a turkish man 21 yrs older than me his jelousy destroyed our relationship but I think ur age gap is not so big I can only advise u to follow ur instincts and ur heart and never accept second best lol

Answer 8

Check out he is not married already, i know of a couple of turkish guys that live over here and got "married just to stay in the country!

Answer 9

My cousins married Turkish guys 2 have stayed here in the UK and complain about the cold all the time, the other didnt like it and he went back to Turkey, so she (my cous) spends 6 months here and 6 months with her husband in Turkey it works well for them.

Answer 10

11 years ago, I was where you are now. He wasn't a muslim, but from Southeast-Europe aswell. He was caring and loving and all, never ever hit me BEFORE we got married.
10 days after our wedding, he hit me for the first time, my MIL, who was ever so nice before we got married, turned evil, even told him to beat me to shorten my tongue. He turned very possesive and manipulative, beating the carp out off me until I finally had the guts to leave him. On the day, when he got his unlimited visum for Germany, he wasn't opposed to a split-up anymore. It was a nightmare, and I got divorced from him a bit more than 3 years ago, he made my life hell on earth, even after the divorce, stalked me, badmouthed me at CPS.

10 years ago, I would have thought, that I'd never ever say, what I'm telling you now, but I learned it the hard way. Stay within your own culture, when you get married. Marriage is challenging enough as it is, you don't need cultural differences on top of that. A few friends of me married friends of him and they're all divorced today or their marriages are horrible. There was not even one of those marriages, that withstood the time. Those girls were all german and the guys all came from the same background as my ex. They just have another view on women down there, and they weren't even muslim, but catholics.

So my answer would be: Don't do it.

Answer 11

Kind of hard to comment without knowing you both. The only potential problems I can see are in relation to cultural or religious differences, be sure you know what difficulties or challenges that can bring. Otherwise, I wish you both the best of luck.