2007-03-24 11:14:55 · 14 answers · asked by kelly m 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i agree with a lot of the other posters...
either he leaves for a while or you do, especially if you have children, but even if you dont you must seperate for a a week or so so you can think seriously about the situation.
my new partner pushed me about and pinched and yelled and shoved me for about 2 hours one night when he got very drunk. i woke my 2 kids (his step daughters) and called my mother and we stayed there for 2 days,during which time i had lots of pleading,bribing,sobbing,apologetic calls.iwent back as the girls' school was 5 mins walk from our house but a 7 mile drive from my mothers, and i had had a VERY serious conversation with him and laid out the rules as i wanted them,then told him if he deviated from the boundaries at all, it was over. he can get stroppy when drunk, but even so he knows where the line is now.
but maybe your assault was very serious, im not sure as you didnt reveal that.any assault is serious, im not denying that.
you need to talk to him when you've been apart a few days in a neutral public location.
i hope this works out for you. do what your ehart tells you is best for you and any children.
good luck
2007-03-24 11:52:51 · answer #1 · answered by hedgewitch 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Did he apologize for it? Do you want to stay in the marriage? I think yes, because if you wanted to leave you would have the second he hit you. Question is does he see this is wrong? Does he want to get help? Can/will you forgive him if you stay? These are questions only you can answer. But if you stay counseling is a MUST. Plus, tell him if he ever does this again not only will you leave,but call the police. This is a horrible cycle and if you have kids it's even worse. So think long and hard about what you want to do. Don't let anyone make up your mind for you. If he is a time bomb maybe some time away will do both of you some good. Whatever your decision is stick to it and stay strong. GOOD LUCK and I wish the best for you.
2007-03-24 18:28:45 · answer #2 · answered by KEISHA L 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I worked for Victim Support for a while,"as long as I could stand it" and watched women go through this.
Problem is once started hard to stop.
I really do hope, you let him out of your life while he seeks help for what ever is going wrong with him.
I'm not saying give up on him,but you need time away,before he abuses you again.
I know from Training courses and personal experience that it takes 25 abusive episodes before a woman will report the abuse,is this what is happening here?
I hope not,but in any case, pls seek help for YOU.
Phone your local Police Station they will give you the number for Domestic Violence Line.
I have worked with these people and most off them have been where your at,they understand and do care.Prevention is better than the cure.
He has the problem not you.
Ask for help and you will get it.
2007-03-24 20:17:01 · answer #3 · answered by live life 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why did he physically assault you after 10 years? It seems like there is some underlying problem here that you haven't mentioned. This is the first time? Get both of yourselves to your doctor/a counsellor, someone who will listen and help. If my husband had never done anything like this before, I would want to know why and get it sorted out - it doesn't sound like the usual domestic violence case, although I am not excusing the behaviour. You must care about this man... I hope you get it sorted out.
2007-03-24 18:24:56 · answer #4 · answered by JENNIFER 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
if there are no kids lady get out of there and even if there is just walk away lifes to short to be treated like that no one has the right to assault a woman stand up for yourself dont be bullied beaten made to feel like a statistic of domestic violence if you dont do something about it yourself SOCIETY really cares AND there is help out there GOOD LUCK and remember SEEK HELP GOD BLESS
2007-03-24 21:33:46 · answer #5 · answered by G Mac 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to report it. and for your protection you may want to consider leaving if even for a while.
you need to think things through as to what you are going to do...it's hard to tell you what to do in regards to your marriage, never been in a situation like that. but from the safety point of view, you need to look out for yourself first and if you have kids, you won't do them any good if your husband ends up killing you in your sleep and their dad goes to jail.
it could happen
2007-03-24 18:22:41 · answer #6 · answered by la21unica 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Wow you think you know someone hey.............
I would leave go to my parents etc and get some space let him think about what he has done, or ask him to leave so you can think
A lot of people on here will say split up, but I know it is not as easy as that, get some counselling find out what happened and if it is likely to happen again, but bloody scare him by getting some space between you.............
good like hun xxxxxxxx
2007-03-24 18:21:17 · answer #7 · answered by xXx Orange Breezer xXx 5 · 6⤊ 0⤋
Assault is a crime and he needs to face the consequences of his actions. If you haven't reported it do so now. There is NO excuse, no acceptable reason. He may be depressed or have other problems but do not let him escape consequences.
2007-03-24 18:27:56 · answer #8 · answered by DelK 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Is this ever happened before now? There is an issue but need more info. before I can give you my suggestion I've been there that's why I asked?
2007-03-24 18:48:46 · answer #9 · answered by rebelprincess6379 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask yourself (even if he is sorry and you have made up) if you can live your life in fear of it happening again. If not make a plan and move on.
2007-03-25 07:22:43 · answer #10 · answered by ann b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋