How long should I let a newborn cry in her crib?

Question

I have a 7 week old daughter who was 6 weeks premature. Tonight will be her first night in her crib. How long should I let her cry before I go to her? I am a first time mom and unsure of how to handle this.

Answer 1

She is only 7 weeks old and was premature. Dont let her cry at all. She is needing something when she cries. She is not just doing it for attention. She is either hungry, wet, or just needing comfort. My 3rd son was 6 weeks early too and I always went to him as soon as he cried. When they get older then you can let them cry for a little bit. But for now she is too young.

Answer 2

NEVER............. It is CRUEL!

"Parents should recognize that having their babies cry unnecessarily harms
the baby permanently. It changes the nervous system so they're sensitive to
future trauma."
- Dr. Michael Commons, Dept of Psychiatry, Harvard


I have read that in future generations, the cry-it-out method will probably be considered child abuse.
Babies are made to wake up throughout the night, they NEED to feed at night and it is thier only way of communication.

It does not excercise thier lungs,
it does not teach them to be independant,


http://www.sleepnet.com/infant3/messages/534.html

America's "let them cry" attitude toward children may lead to more fears and
tears among adults, according to two Harvard Medical School researchers.
Instead of letting infants cry, American parents should keep their babies
close, console them when they cry, and bring them to bed with
them, where they'll feel safe, according to Michael Commons and Patrice
Miller, researchers at the Medical School's Department of Psychiatry.

In a paper presented at the meeting, Commons and Miller contrasted American
child-rearing practices with those of other cultures, particularly the Gusii
tribe of Kenya. Gusii mothers sleep with their babies and respond rapidly
when the baby cries.

"Gusii mothers watching videotapes of U.S. mothers were upset by how long it took these mothers to respond to infant crying," Commons and Miller said in their paper on the subject.

You know what? It upsets me too! Shame on all the mothers who let thier babies cry!


Science tells us that when babies cry alone and unattended, they experience panic and anxiety. Their bodies and brains are flooded with adrenaline and cortisol stress hormones. Science has also found that when developing brain tissue is exposed to these hormones for prolonged periods these nerves won’t form connections to other nerves and will degenerate. Is it therefore possible that infants who endure many nights or weeks of crying-it-out alone are actually suffering harmful neurologic effects that may have permanent implications on the development of sections of their brain? Here is how science answers this alarming question:

Answer 3

However long it takes you to walk from where you are to where she is. You should NEVER let an infant cry unless it is choice between leaving the room for 10 minutes or you shaking the baby.

CIO should never be attempted until a baby is at least 6 months old and preferably 12 if ever.

Science Says: Excessive Crying Could Be Harmful to Babies
http://askdrsears.com/html/10/handout2.asp

SHUTDOWN SYNDROME
http://askdrsears.com/html/10/t131200.asp

31 WAYS TO GET YOUR BABY TO GO TO SLEEP AND STAY ASLEEP EASIER
http://askdrsears.com/html/7/T070300.asp

Answer 4

You shouldn't let her cry any longer than it takes to get to her. Because of her prematurity she isn't even a week old (development outside the womb is slower than inside). Crying unnecessarily stresses her, and that can impact things like growth and development. She needs every advantage you can give her to help her catch up. Usually pediatricians advise to expect development similar to her corrected age, not her actual age. You wouldn't expect a newborn to cry for 10 minutes before being checked. At her age she isn't going to be able to sooth herself. Talk to your doctor about when you can allow her to cry for a short period, and most pediatric offices have an advise nurse that you can check with on these kinds of questions. You might check on resources such as home health nurses or healthy baby programs. Many states or communities offer an educated professional to come to your home to help you adapt to baby. You're going to have lots of questions but your best resource is your own instincts and your baby. Trust yourself to do the best you can for your daughter.

Answer 5

You shouldn't leave a newborn to cry, and no your not the only mother to wonder! Babies cry because it's their only way of communicating that they need something. You can't spoil a newborn, so if she cries, go straight away. She probably wants feeding or changing or maybe just a cuddle. As she gets older you will learn her cries, and when you can leave her to cry! But for now, tend to her every need.

Answer 6

You shouldn't let her "cry it out" until she understands that

when she cant see or feel you, you are still there

and that she is not being abandoned, and is aware of her surroundings.

This usually happens btw 6-9 months old (or 'gestation age' if shes a preemie, add 6+ weeks)

if you are worried about getting her to sleep more at night, make sure you keep all of the lights off. Artificial lights are confusing to them.Try turning on a dim light or a TV with the sound turned down if you need to change her diaper or feed her. It will happen naturally on its own. It worked for me, I didn't have to let my son cry it out.

At worst, if you are breastfeeding id say you will probably be waking up every two hours for about a month, 3 hours at 3 months and so on and so on. (the "initiation") Ive heard with bottle feeding they might sleep for slightly longer periods but will usually get colic and spend more time screaming anyways.

Good luck.

Answer 7

there is defiantly not a set time each child is different. but dont let them cry so hard they make themselves sick. check all the key signs before letting them cry is her diaper wet or is she hungry. if she is dry and full then it is just kinda till you cant stand it any more. but after a few times of her knowing that you will come back and havent left her forever she will realize it is ok to be alone. just give it time...newborns are supposed to cry but remember they know just about as much about what she is supposed to do as you do. so teach her how things are going to work around your house. it will take alittle time but it will work. good luck and congrats on the new baby!

Answer 8

Awwwwww. I never let my kids cry until they were maybe 3 months old and starting to be a bit more aware. As you know, your baby is a bit behind because of her prematurity. If it were me, I'd go into the room quickly, pat her on the back, sing to her, give her the binky if she uses one. If there was no calming her at all, I'd pick her up and rock her for awhile, or feed her if she needs it. You won't spoil her for the first few months!

Answer 9

oh my ur talking about a newborn u should leave her cry for approx......ZERO minutes....it is not recommended u allow a child under 9 months cry it out....hold your baby! at this age if you pick her up at the slightest whimper at will only teach her she dosent need to scream her head off to get the point across and u will be rewarded latter with a child who will no begin screaming at the drop of a hat.....u cannot spoil a child 6mo and younger (i believe it to be much more then 6 mo.) hold your little one as much as you can and be happy to be there for her ur all she has if u need to get things done or use both hands buy a sling or baby carrier they're amazing tools when it comes to calming babies and keeping them happy they also allow for u to cook ,clean, talk on the phone without struggling one handed.....slings are also used for preemies they call it "kangaroo care" and helps them regulate breathing and heart rate and lowers chance for SIDS......GOOD LUCK and best wishes

Answer 10

Generally letting the baby cry will allow it to be slightly independant because if you keep attending to your child every minute of the day he/she will become so accustomed to it, it will become unbearable in future years as the dependancy on you will only increase! Thats not to say you should allow he/she to cry for very long periods but just enough to allow you to recognise if it is just attention he/she seeks or he/she needs something ie nappy change, feed!! Hope it will help, always did with my two little monsters!! But remember, don`t always give in as you will grow to realise the repercussions!! Good luck, take care