English women married to Turkish men?

Question

I am a middle aged woman who has just met a young Turkish man who wants to marry me but he still lives in Turkey. Any advice??

Answer 1

He only wants a residency for this country. I can`t believe some women are SO GULLIBLE!

Answer 2

Please contact me and i will tell you my story and if none of these people have convinced you by now, my story will. I'm one of those older, naive women who fell for the handsome turkish prince who knew all the right moves. I wouldn't listen to my friends' warnings - thought they were paranoid. You won't have a clue - the acting is superb. Funny how as soon as Canada said no to his visa ( they smelled a rat), he begged me to come back saying he missed me so deeply. I went. He served me with divorce papers as soon as i landed. You are saying But my guy isn't like this. You won't know. You will see him cry when you question the wisdom of marrying - how could you do this to him, you are his everything blah blah. He will sing love songs to you on Istiklal and be so adoring. Let's imagine you do marry him and he gets a visa or is refused a visa. One day his mother will say ok son time to dump her and then start arranging a marriage secretly. The death threats and abuse will begin - all an effort to make you leave willingly once he has the visa. You will suddenly go from being a princess in a fairy tale to being garbage that's making his family smell bad. The shock still makes me head spin several months later. You have no idea of the depth of turkish family culture at this point because you haven't seen the underside of all that cozy family togetherness. You won't be welcome to visit them - god forbid the neighbors should see. And if you do go near their neighborhood you will wait on the street and be looked at by men who think you're selling something while your husband pays a quick visit to mom. Mom runs the show. Your husband has no voice of his own and you'll grow to despise his weakness. Think I'm just bitter ? maybe but am telling you that you as an older woman and an outsider are a sitting duck. The turkish male must produce children, wife must be same age or younger, muslim and turkish. You are none of these. If ever in your life you needed to be careful it is now. There are no more love songs on Istiklal for me - just me emailing him to appease him so he won't call my family and friends in my own country to threaten them. Just me stopping him from leaving Turkey illegally to avoid alimony. The travel guide says Warning to women - turkish men can be extremely charming and many women have fallen victim. My husband and i used to laugh about this together. Didn't know he was laughing AT me.

Answer 3

Are you sure hes just not looking for his citizenship?

Obviously only you really know him, but especially if you met him over the internet, their are ALOT of people who do this to try to get their Visa. Its unfortunate.

If he is the real deal, and think long and hard about it. The fastest way, would be to travel to Turkey, get married. And then come back to Britain (he would have to stay in Turkey) and apply for a marriage Visa. It will take anywhere from 3 to 12 months. But then he will be able to come live in Britain with you, where you can then have a ceremony wedding if that is what you want.

Answer 4

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Answer 5

Please be very wary about this man. i have read so many stories about older ladies who have been wooed by young Turkish men, only to be conned out of money or used just as a passport to the UK.

i am not saying that your guy is the same, but unfortunately only the bad stories seem to be printed, I've yet to read any that had a happy ending (I'm sure that there are some out there before anyone starts bashing me!)

Please hold back and don't fall head over heels, find out what his motives are, and better still, forget him. sorry to be blunt!!

Good luck.

Answer 6

Listen the best thing you should do it to let him stay where he is at. Do you know any thing about their culture when come to relationship? If you get invole with him your way of life will become a thing of the past. Because you would be living under the ways of Turkish. Their spouse doesn't have many rights to do or said in their relationship.

Answer 7

Yes. Of course. Every marriage has its struggles, but they must not give up. I know as a fact that males from the Middle East and surrounding areas, know how to express there feelings, are romantics. And what is wrong with a man hugging a man or kissing a man on the cheeks. On the other hand they can use the Woman, draw her in with their amazing charms and romance, and use her for a visa to the UK.

Answer 8

be very wary, i dont want to burst your bubble but the statistics here are not good! if it is the real thing....and it may well be then time will show this, please do not rush into anything yet, yes you are flattered and he may well be genuine but give it lots of time first, get him over on holiday if a visa will permit, spend at least 2 years as a couple before you jump in, if he pressures you then just enjoy what you have had and count it as an experience and hopefully fab s*x but move on and let your confidence be boosted DO NOT MARRY ON A WHIM you will regret it later, have fun though x

Answer 9

a friend of mine got married to a Turkish man moved to England 6 months later they put in for a divorce now he lives here with his family that says it all just wanted a British citizenship

Answer 10

i had a brief affiar with a turkish man but he never wanted a residency. maybe cause i am from a country which is even poorer than his!my advice is always listen to your inner voice. if you have doubts then wait.not all men are the same. by the by, is he educated? why does he wants to stay in turkey? does that mean he wants you to stay too?talk to him. tell him that you cannot give him residency. lets see where that leads.

Answer 11

if your looking for love then your looking in the wrong place? if you just want a nice time and he says he likes you, then why marry him? just have him as a boyfriend.... if he doesn't want that then he doesn't love you he loves your country and a passport... so to be so negative, but don't you read take a break? theres a story like this in there every week and they are always unhappy endings.