I've just accepted that my relationship with my girlfriend is over. The thing I can't get straight is that she has fell in love with another man and I know who he is. Is it likely he has made a play for her as she stated in her diary (yes I know, Ive already been hammered about it) How do I deal with this man when I see him. I saw him once before and he avoided me when he should have spoke to me. Was he feeling guilty? I need advice on how to cope with seeing them together and if he has been making moves on her.
2007-03-24 08:29:25 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I don't want my girlfriend blamed for this, she didn't run off and have a sneaky affair, I did treat her very badly for a long time so it's probably my own fault. I can't ignore them we have a child together and I will see him at some point.
2007-03-24 08:46:00 · update #1
You should think of damage limitation. Remember the child needs to know his/her Dad and if you can keep communication open then you may have access to this very important person that was created out of your relationship. So you need to go get some advice about access to the child.
I think the relationship with this person who you feel usurped you is secondary because you have to now take responsibility for this child. You must feel hurt and the damage may last some time. You also have to be adult and learn from this whole situation. And move on keeping in mind that you will think about the way you treat people and perhaps get help for your relationship problems because you don't want to go back into a situation and let history repeat its self.
Best wishes to you and yours x
2007-03-24 08:52:26 · answer #1 · answered by : 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he avoided you, then sounds like he does feel guilty. Or was trying to avoid a confrontation.
And it also sounds as if your ex was on the rebound, so the relationship may well not last very long.
Would you actually WANT to talk to him if you saw him again? I'd say hang out with your mates next time your likely to bump into him or her, at least that way you have moral support. Or can at least to look like your having a good time without him or her.
If he has been making moves on her - then that's his buisness, you've accepted that your relationship has ended, don't cut yourself up even more by wondering about if he made a play for her when you were still together. And if he did - then he should feel guilty about it and not you. Don't worry you'll get over it and find someone else!
2007-03-24 08:57:51 · answer #2 · answered by beausbreeches 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having been through something like this myself [without the child],,,,,, take some time and find yourself how you was before you met her,,,,,,, and really he has done you a favour and she'll probably do the same to him, it's just a matter of time,,,,, I know how hard this can be ,,,,,, you'll get there in the end just keep occupied and stay away for a while
2007-03-24 19:56:41 · answer #3 · answered by P-H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its in the past now that you read the diary, so forget feeling guilty. You found out some truths from that, and it will help with the way you deal with this now. Yes they have betrayed you, and you should rise above it when you see them smile and look as though you dont give a ****.
2007-03-24 08:36:06 · answer #4 · answered by babyshambles 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you still call her your girfriend even tho u have accepted its over? i dont think you have, heartbreak is huge and takes a while to heal..but not as long as you would expect..the best advice i can give is you have to look like you dont give a toss about her or him, he will be even more nervous as to why u dont care... she will wonder why u dont fancy her anymore an might end up back in ur arms!! reverse psychology goes down a treat!!
2007-03-27 09:27:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He probably doesn't know how you feel about the sitiuation. If you are okay with everything then let him know. You are right since you have a child with her you will see him. So let him know you can act like an adult about this.
2007-03-24 09:00:15 · answer #6 · answered by Candi L 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
violence is never the answer, but in this case, i think you should swing a punch or two at him)))
if you know him, obviously he has no respect for you..... after all he did take your lady
ignore him, move on, and enjoy youself to the max in the search for a new girlfriend
he probably did you a huge favour, she'll cheat on him too
2007-03-24 08:38:41 · answer #7 · answered by solraj 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore them and leave them toit....by your own admission you treated her badly....why??? You had your chance it seems and blew it. Let her find happiness now. You maybe owe her that much. Find yourself a new woman and learn from your mistakes find a good one and nurture and care.
2007-03-24 09:24:00 · answer #8 · answered by eagledreams 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it should be easier to deal with as the trust has gone,and its impossible for relationship to survive without that trust.you will always,always see your child and be a dad to that child no one can stop that.
2007-03-28 02:11:13 · answer #9 · answered by fairy_gdmthr 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to just pretend like he doesn't exist. Speak only to her regarding your child together and do not speak at all to him. Do not leave messages with him for her either.
2007-03-25 22:53:44 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋