13 days ago, I gave birth to my third child. As much as I love my children, I'll admit it is tiring to keep up with an infant, 3 year old and a seven year old.
My mother-in-law has called us earlier, stating that she, my father-in-law, and my husband's sister would like to come up and stay for a while to spend time with the whole family.
I do love them, but I don't think I can keep up with my children's schedules, my husband and then start to clean and make room for them.
How can I tell them that I would prefer for them to visit in a few months without offending them?
2007-03-24 08:18:45 · 12 answers · asked by Kylie N 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
Suggest June as a better month for a visit, that way...the 7 yr. old will be out of school and around more to spend more time with the grandparents...tell them PERSONALLY...dont make your husband do this....tell them you are tired and would prefer a few months recovery time before they visit.
2007-03-24 08:22:32 · answer #1 · answered by motherhendoulas 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell them it is not time yet. I have been begging my husbands family to come here (my baby is 24 days old). When they come they actually clean and do for themselves. I found it a really big help to have family around, but this is my first and I had some problems when we got home.
If they really want to come they should know that you are to be resting and not to expect much. Matter of fact I would make a list of things that need to be done and have it waiting when they get there!
2007-03-24 15:24:18 · answer #2 · answered by MyOpinionMatters 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What I did with my own mother was suggest that they wait until my baby was a month old before they came to visit. I explained I wanted time for the family to get use to the new addition and I wanted to be adapted to my new life before we had company. If your in-laws have any respect for you they will hear that and know that it makes a lot of sense. Just be honest and it should be fine. If you don't think you can do it then ask your husband to talk to his parents.
2007-03-24 15:23:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let them come and take over the schedule for you!!
Let Mom-in-law clean and cook and be chauffer while you and your new little one get some rest.
There is no reason why you should feel like you have to "entertain" family!
Make it clear that they ARE family and shouldn't expect to be waited on and then DON'T wait on them. They are all grown.
Assume they WANT to come help you out and then give them some concrete assignments that will give you the time to recoup your strength.
(I did it after our second child was born and it was wonderful! NO ONE complained! My M-I-L was delighted to feel needed!)
Good luck!
2007-03-24 15:24:52 · answer #4 · answered by stonechic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just tell them you aren't ready for visitors and all that entails them coming, cooking cleaning etc you need your rest and to get yourself and everyone in your household on schedule before having anyone stay over for a visit.
I think being honest is the best way to go. If they want to come and visit maybe they can stay in a hotel so you don't have to tend to them ontop of 2 children& a newborn that is just too much for u.
2007-03-24 15:22:39 · answer #5 · answered by cutiepie81289 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when I am in situations like this I just blame myself.
I say something like "I know I'm a big spaz, but even though It would be so fun to have you visit and you would want to help, Im feeling pretty hectic right now so it would be better to wait a few months"
If they get offended or give you a hard time, they are in the wrong. You need to take care of yourself and your babies right now. And Hubby should help tell them, its his family and he should support you!
2007-03-24 15:32:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ugh, I don't envy you. I would just straight out tell them that you have too much on your plate at the moment and that you would rather wait until the summer. Or have them stay at someone else's house or at a hotel. That is too much to ask of you! Good luck!
2007-03-24 15:21:51 · answer #7 · answered by purple_lily76 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just tell them you arent feeling well and would like to be able to spend time with them when they do come so its best to wait a little while. Maybe your husband should be the one to tell them. I am sure they would understand. You have to be honest and tell them.
2007-03-24 15:23:46 · answer #8 · answered by samira 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just explain, and be polite. However, tell them they can come see the baby - just that you will be unable to handle them staying at your home.
2007-03-24 15:26:26 · answer #9 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you don't , your husbands family = his problem. tell him how you feel he should support you , he would know the best way to handle it. if it were your family you would have to handle it , trust me they are less likely to take it personally coming from him
2007-03-28 00:54:57 · answer #10 · answered by farra 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋