i have 2 best frnds of all time. one of them is the greatest friend ever and she always helps me with everything and lately she has been VERY depressed and i want to help her out a lot because she has helped me through the hardest of times through my life. she closed all means of contact and i can't reach her at all. and she keeps sayin i'm dying cuz of some thins and that is a suicidal thought.
my other friend is great but she has more than one best friend which i dont' mind but she always puts me second and she is always first on my list. she always tells me that she is here for me whenever i need her to be but then when i do need her she kind of ignores me. when i am happy ( and i am a generally funny person) she talks to me and it seems she uses me to solve her own problems and use my humor to help herself. she talks with her other friends about me and she always makes it seem i am a weird person. also i don't really beleive she thinks of me as a frnd even though she says i am.
2007-03-24 07:03:38 · 12 answers · asked by Lila 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
for the first friend i have tried talking, surprising and pretty much everythign btu i don't knwo how she can but she has made it impossible to get in contact with her. and it is because of ehr parents she is this depressed.
2007-03-24 07:21:24 · update #1
the second friend is so dear and special to me that it is imposible for me to believe her of a friend who is not very close. and i have talked to her about many problems but turns out none of them is what she is interested in. it is still ahrd to not let ehr be my best friend
2007-03-24 07:22:31 · update #2
you need to forget the 2nd friend for now and concentrate on the first one. how did she help you when you were going through hard times.... try to remember, and maybe this will help you help her out of hers.
good luck.
2007-03-24 07:10:15 · answer #1 · answered by daryleddy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For your first friend - if the situation is so serious that she's suicidal, you should consider telling her parents (you didn't mention an age so I'm assuming), guardian or someone who has a lot of influence on her and asking them to get her some proffesional help.
Your second friend sounds like she really isn't a friend at all and you should probably bump her out of your inner circle of friends. Think of your friends as darts on a target - bulls eye is your very best friends you can trust with anything and the farthest out circle is for the people you aren't very close to and they don't have much influence on you. From what you say, this friend talks about you and uses you. She should probably be bumped to a circle that's farther out from the bullseye. Whatever you do though, remember that it's not usually good to completely X out a person as a friend since people change and might be more mature and trustworthy later in their lives.
2007-03-24 14:15:29 · answer #2 · answered by Kaiya 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first one need your help. Get some balloons, and a present, and maybe some chocolate. And write her a letter about how scared you are for her. And then, call her to make sure she's home, but don't say like "I'm coming over" And then, ask your mom or dad to drive you to her house, and surprise her with the balloons and such. And then ask if you can stay for a while, and enjoy the cookies or w/e you give her to eat that has chocolate in it. And then, be like "I feel like you've been really upset lately, and it is really scaring me. " and see what she says, and I think since you two are tight, you can go on. And the second friend? Call her one day, and fake a problem. See what she does, If she doesn't stay true, tell her that she is NOT caring about your problems. I doubt she is a real friend, so just stick with your first friend, and help her through this.
2007-03-24 14:15:27 · answer #3 · answered by yoooooooooooo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend is very depressed and her shutting you out of her life is a sign of this. If you're worried about her hurting herself and you feel it's a REAL threat and not just talk then please tell her parents or another trusted adult. This may make her angry at you, but consider it saving a life. A lot of people use suicide as a threat to get attention.
Your other friend sounds like she has other priorities. If she doesn't put you first don't sweat it. I'm sure you have other friends and hobbies that you can fill your time with. The important thing to do is not smother her or you will drive her further away. If you're having problem and she doesn't want to listen to them then you can't force her. Find other trusted friends or outlets for these issues. Soon you will forget all about her.
Good luck with your troubles.
2007-03-24 14:09:30 · answer #4 · answered by plume 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try to be there for the first friend as much as you can. You seem like a very caring person. As for the second friend, have you ever heard of a fair weather friend? Someone that's only there when things are fun or good. Some people don't have empathy, or sympathy for others and don't know how to deal with it. Maybe she's not really a friend
2007-04-01 01:44:37 · answer #5 · answered by supposed winner 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to talk with a counsler or one of her parents or siblings about this or maybe someone in her family that she gets along with very well and let them know that you are scared for her and wants to try your hardest to help her. Your other friend on the other hand is using you to help her through her problems and I think it is about time that you drop her like a bad habit or talk to her and let her know that you don't like her talking about you behind your back to her other friends, that when you need her she should at least be there since you're always there for her but don't put it in her face in a negative way and let her know that if she doesn't change her ways you are going to stop being her friend but if she needs help that you won't turn your back on her but help her.
2007-03-24 14:24:08 · answer #6 · answered by jamaicaladydread 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well there's a couple of ways that you can help the first gal 1 just leave her and she may get over it
2 tell her that your there for her through what ever she is going through
and for the 2nd gal either tell her 2 get lost or explain to her how you feel like tell her that you don't like the way she is treating you
2007-04-01 04:14:26 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The 1st friend seems like someone good to have. The 2nd one isn't a friend. The 1st one you should get some help. Don't want her killing herself. Maybe you could even talk to her parents / a counciler, or someone.
2007-04-01 12:04:30 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have strange friends...
for your first friend, well you can't contact her, so you can't do very much. you should keep trying to reach her.
your second friend--if you can call her a friend-- seems to be using you and that is not nice. just leave her alone, or tell her off or something.
2007-03-31 23:18:19 · answer #9 · answered by blah... 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well 4 da 1st frnd i no she may get mad but if she thiks bout killin herself tell her mom if u really care tell sumone else just dont thik tht if i do tht she will get hurt u dont want 2 have tht burdon if she kills herslf and u knew
2007-03-31 19:09:07 · answer #10 · answered by Atoshio 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋