Confused in marraige?

Question

I've been married to an incredible woman for over 20 years. Lately we've been going through a rough time. Then along comes a beautiful woman who is half my age. Several times I have been tempted in the past, but I have always declined. But I feel I'm falling in love.

Answer 1

There's your answer : your married to a incredible woman.
Listen,I went through the same thing but I was the other woman, god forbid. AM sorry for it now, and the 4 year affair hurt alot of people, and it was a emotional roller coster ride for me and the wife. But guess what the wife won in the end, you cant replace history and children together and special moments with family, with what you think you feel now. This is a new experience for you and ever day feels like the forth of July-- but it doesnt compare with the security of the wife and family you have at home. These feelings will pass, get reaquainted with your wife socially, sexually, emotionally, and make a effort, to recapture the feelings the two of you had, that made you feel the same as you are feeling for this other women.
A bridge that is crumbling is hard to cross when its suspened between two cliffs. RECONSIDER.

Answer 2

Your not confused. You want a younger woman. Nothing wrong with that, however there are consequences. If you go ahead with an affair your wife will have reasonable grounds to leave you. You need to think about what you want, and if being with another woman will really accomplish this. As someone else already said, talk this through with your wife and she how she feels. It would not be surprising if she became really upset by hearing this kind of news. Bottem line is feel out what the end result is going to be from your actions. And for your sake, if you do have an affair do not get caught.

Answer 3

I've been in a marriage that I was miserable in.I meet my now current husband and now am very happy he is my age,my ex is much older than me.Age is a factor but it doesn't make or break a relationship.

You can't be happy in any relationship until you work though your issues current or past.You can't exhume that just because this is fresh and new there won't be any issues.New wears off.Also due to her age you probably already done thing like bought home ,had kids,finished all desired school. she might not be there quite yet so you need to be sure that you guys have the same goals and are headed in the same direction before you even go there.

As far as you wife 20 years is a Long time to be together.So you need to find the core of your problems,Try to fix them and if you can't then so be it.It deserves a shot right.


The best of look to you and everyone involved.

Answer 4

You have to choose between incredible woman n beautiful woman? A question for you to think:.Will beautiful woman become incredible woman after 20 years? yes you might be feeling falling in love now.. but are you sure it is not love on the rebound as you having a hard time with your wife now. Since you have been tempted before, i believe you will not bend to this temptation. Work out the differences with your wife now. Cherish the things you have with her.

Answer 5

Don't get caught between the confusion of love and the need of affection...

Try to fix the issues at home before you fall for temptation so things don't get more difficult and complicated. A rough time in a relationship shouldn't give anyone the excuse to cheat, whether it involves feelings or not. You are still married to a WONDERFUL WOMAN and you shouldn't take that for granted, even through difficult times...

Hopefully things will be better soon and when that happens you don't want to have any regrets or to hurt the person who has stand by you for so long through good and not so good ones...

Be careful with what you are setting yourself for... since failure shouldn't be an option and even when mistakes are made a conscious decision on time can avoid a lot of pain later.

Answer 6

20 years of marriage and you would throw that away for for a brief affair? you know the younger woman won't be interested in you in another 5 years.
Finding an "incredible woman" who can put up with any man's idiosyncrasies AND be married to her is the Holy Grail. Think about what your life will be without your wife in another 20 years. Get it?
You're not falling in love, it's just lust and attention, affection. Think of why you married you wife and focus on her.

Answer 7

I am very sorry, but I have to be blunt.
I don't care what you think of me. I only hope that my letter makes you think.

Are you stupid?! Do you want to lose everything you have put together over the past 20 years so that you can get laid by a girl?! If it's that important to you, go ahead. But you should think about the consequences first.
You will lose your wife. You had an affair, so you will be royally scr*wed by her attorney during the divorce. Most of the people that used to be your friends are going to turn their backs on you. Who wants a friend who does something like that to his wife?

As I said, I don't care if you like this letter, but at least consider the consequences first.

Answer 8

i've got confidence that this could be a different undertaking culturally. i'm thinking why she is going to her brother - i think of that she is fearful of you. If she is fearful of you, you ought to bypass to counseling. on your custom, i'm particular that girls are slightly greater compliant than i'm used to - so the certainty that she is telling you what you elect to hearken to isn't remarkable - she won't confront you - she will enable her brother do this - yet you may verify that the notice popping out of his mouth are actually not a figment of his mind's eye. struggling with isn't unusual in marriages, however the ought to call the police is rather unusual and shows which you're dropping administration. i'm so sorry which you're having this sort of not undemanding time. a clean spouse and toddler are very massive stressors - you ought to be elementary with your self and get help so as which you would be a efficient individual on your new child's existence. the certainty which you will lose administration in India devoid of effect sound alluring to you - I understand - yet you would be the greater effectual individual for gaining administration and setting up greater standards for your self, and know many rewards in the top - maximum of all, having a daughter that's familiar with you and loves you and is not fearful of you, in spite of even in the journey that your marriage survives this or not!

Answer 9

If you and your wife are going through a rough time, it will all go away when she finds out you are cheating.

have you thought about sitting down and telling her how you feel in your marriage, and asking her how she feels? if you love her, you will WORK on making things better.

you can't pull communication out of your butt! You have to LISTEN and talk.... and come up with some solution or compromise... otherwise, you're doomed.

You aren't falling in love. You are thinking with the wrong head.

Answer 10

We all know that we should do what ever it takes to save our marriage,specially when we have that many years invested in a marriage and possibly kids,But if we have done all we can it is not for us to be unhappy,so we need to move on when the love is gone to keep from hurting each other more than we have,But don't let a younger lady influence you in your decision let it be your own that you have did all you can to save your marriage,remember never cheat always end the marriage first to save the heartaches of being cheated on.I wish you well in your decision.