why are we not perfect match ?

Question

I'm puzzled for my life now. Who could help me ? When I studied at college , I knew a boy in March last year , he is a barber ,30 years old ,didnot get high education .but we falled in love . He loved me very much ,and would like do anything for me ,his best wishes is giving me happiness . He even changed the new work lines for me , but failed . Now , he will return his former work as a barber .One year past , we are still in love , but I'm tired , because he is very very poor , I always send money to him becuase of his work changing . Therefore, I worked almost 8 months , I owned money instead of deposting money , I didnot send any money to my family , I am very sorry for my parents . I always hurt them . My family doesnot agree with my choosing ,because they think the boy cannot give me happiness ,even the daily life expenses .Almost all of my friends did not agree with it . I'm not money-lover ,but I am really afraid my future life . I want to give up the feeling ~but I love him.

Answer 1

money isn't everything.....but love doesn't pay the bills.You both need to sit down and do some SERIOUS talking about what you both want from the other and what you want in life.And if you both have the same goals then figure out how to achieve them together and what steps each of you need to talk.
It shouldn't be up to just you OR just him.In a relationship it must be a combined effort or it doesn't work.

Answer 2

I want to say no one is a perfect match. We grow together, we work together for the better of the two then we mature. I can't say your doing the right thing by giving him money but, you sound like you have a big heart. You should be careful though, make sure you know where that money is going. If he's really using it to get ahead or just living off you.

Barber school shouldn't be longer then six to eight months. It would be wise to see where this money is going. You can't support your family either. In this day and age, it takes two people to make a good go of things and get what they want in life, weather your money wise or not, it takes two.

Answer 3

well, if your guy has no aspirations to do more to gain an income. why are you sending him money? how did he do before he and you met? where did his livelyhood come from?
finding love unexpectedly...is it forever...or isnt it? what are his goals? will love empower him to make bigger goals?
sometimes love is the leap for personal empowerment, courage. sometimes one leaps in and out again. out of fear.
your fear is that the dreams you and your parents had for you, for your future is not the dream that you are currently living.
give it more time. he made a try with another job. give him more praise and encouragement. its never too late to learn something new. maybe his dream is to simply be a barber with bills to pay. I hope you give it a go..you are still young.
peace

Answer 4

seems like a gold digger to me..
are you sure he isn't just milking you?
here's the thing..
if the person you are with alienates you from the people who loves you and you love then you have some serious thinking to do.. not to mention you are sacrificing a lot.. he shouldn't be asking you for money all the time..
of course there's that crap about for richer and for poorer.. but you're already having a hard time and you guys arent even married yet..
think about it.. money cant buy you happiness but seems like your not happy too..

Answer 5

tell your bf that you want your family to come to love and respect him as much as you do. encourage him to choice a profession or job and stick with it. explain that you can not finance him or keep getting him out of a bind because you are getting in debt. when and if you marry you will combine homes and will be paying for less utilities and rent.
tell him your goals. i would like for us both to be happy professionally, marry, buy a home instead of rent, etc. he just needs to grow up and become more financially responsible and he will not do that if you keep bailing him out. sometimes tell him i am broke.