Have tried and tried asking but he won't confess. The guy is a pathological liar. Do these stubborn men in denial ever confess ? Is there a trick to getting my husband to confess ?
2007-03-23 19:43:00 · 18 answers · asked by seker 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Am going to hire a PI just to be able to show himhe didn't foolme which is what he takes so much pleasure in doing - conning people. Also very curious to see who she is. He may be reluctant because of divorce happening but i know he would never confess after anyway.
2007-03-23 20:09:52 · update #1
You have to understand that there is a dynamic behind adulterers. Number one, they have a problem with having a concience and moral character, otherwise, they wouldn't do it. They also have a problem with responsability and ownership of their behavior. I would recommend to just hire a PI. Don't play games. But before that be aware of what will happen if you catch him. Will you forgive him? Will you stay in the marriage as if nothing has happened? are you prepared to move on? are there children? do you understand all the pain kids go through when there is an intense divorce? do you understand that the real victims here will be the children? why? because you and your husband are adults. You get to make the choice, not them. So, if you decide you can't move on, why investigate? and if you are completely confident that you can move on without turning the whole situation into manipulation, hatred and games, then hire a PI, find out what is going on, and if he is cheating on you, move on. Why argue with "the devil." What I mean, you will never convince the devil, or Hittler, or Saddham Hussein or Fidel Castro that what they are doing is wrong, don't waste your time waiting for your cheating husband to come with true remorse and validation.
Good luck.
2007-03-23 19:56:01 · answer #1 · answered by A_O 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Why do you need him to confess it? If you have proof or really suspect it then don't waste your time getting a confession it won't change him especially if he is a pathological liar, what is the point? You are just going to make it worse for yourself in the long run. Ask yourself what will you accomplish by him confessing if you know it in your heart to be true? Leave or kick him out if that is what you wish to do but don't torture yourself with the rest.
2007-03-23 19:50:11 · answer #2 · answered by Wicked Good 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'll ask you a question in a minute.
First, when raising children, don't force them to become a liar.
Don't ask your little boy; "Did you steal a cookie when you were at Mrs. Neighbor's house?" He knows it is wrong to steal and a little white lie is less wrong. So he lies.
It would be better to say "We don't ever eat cookies away from home. I have some here. Wouldn't it be fun if we each shared a couple right now?" There is no lie and there should be some fun.
Next, the question. Do you want to keep your hubby or risk finding another guy that might not be as good?
If you want to get rid of him, keep up the unhappy "lie forcing" attitude in your home. (I bet the other lady is not doing that.)
If you want to keep him, offer to share cookies right now and so often from now on, in such a variety, that he'll forget about "Mrs Neighbor". (Don't you ever, ever remind him.)
2007-03-23 20:09:41 · answer #3 · answered by shortnthick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't need a confession as long as you know it's true. Takes a coward not to admit to it. Had he admitted willingly I may have said try to work it out with him if possible. But the man is dishonest....totally! You can do better than him and you ARE worth it!! I doubt he confesses. Maybe a year later when he thinks you won't do anything about it. Good luck, hun.
2007-03-23 19:50:59 · answer #4 · answered by Im Listening 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can tell him that you had an affair,and you are sorry, and you only did it because you found out he had did the same, if he denys it, tell him he can fess up, so you all can get thing out in the open, and try and start your lives over again in the right way.with a clean slate.But if he is really stubborn, he will not confess, he will take it to his grave.
2007-03-23 19:51:04 · answer #5 · answered by I am women 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He won't confess. Same way a woman won't confess, most times. All you can do is get proof. Unless you can get pics of them doing the deed, or any kind of PDA, then you can't prove adultery.
2007-03-23 20:38:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your playing a game with him. Of course he isn't going to confess, why should he?
If your going to divorce him anyway, just do it and get it over with, stop making your life miserable.
2007-03-23 20:34:24 · answer #7 · answered by cowboydoc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he is an adulterous,pathological liar,im not sure why you are investing so much time with this. confessing will not change his behavior.he is lying to himself as well. there is little chance he will change.its in the very chemical makeup of his cells by now. i know of no way to resolve this. the only control you have is the control you have over yourself. best wishes
2007-03-23 19:52:29 · answer #8 · answered by DEBI M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask yourself. Are you sure he's cheating? At this point if there isn't any trust what is the point of a PI? Don't waist your money. Do you have children with him? You don't to catch something. Perhaps it would be better to walk away from the relationship.
2007-03-23 20:53:17 · answer #9 · answered by Akonte 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No tricks as such but the only way a guy would confess when confronted with hard solid proof. Literally meaning catching him with pants down.
2007-03-23 19:47:57 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋