OK. I see alot of comments on how much the husband ignores the wife concerning intimate affection. When I ask my wife for some fun, it seems the answer is either too late, not now, I've got a headache or she's just not into it. When I don't ask and let her come to me, it's MUCH more enjoyable b/c I KNOW she's into it. And knowing she's into it, drives me crazy. And it's alot more FUN. So how come they're is a catch 22? I don't think it is bad to let the woman ask sometimes. I have NEVER turned her down. OK maybe once due to the fact that I was upset at her. I apologized. It should be no issue right? I mean I like asking but it's kinda nice to wake up with a n*ked woman on top of you sometimes. What do you think?
2007-03-23 18:20:45 · 8 answers · asked by bigdaddy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Talk about the bedroom activity outside of the bedroom.
wish you would have talked about it before marriage, but oh well.
I do not think that it should ever be denied by either spouse! The Bible even speaks against it.
Be realistic and know that a times you will want it and she does not and she will want it and you do not,but agree to get it when ever either one of you want it so that you can have peace.
Ok. I am going to tell you how to survive this and be a happier man.(men do not generally know what the heck thier emotions are and a lot of you guys sure as heck do not have the experience to deal with the roller coaster ride of emotions that we can take you on-so follow this.
Outside of the bedroom talk to her-Get some nice flowers and sit next to her and say this: "Baby, I really want to express myself to you right now- can you listen?" next
You look her straight into her eyes and you tell her:
"You mean the world to me and the day you became my wife is the day that my heart began to know that it would be happy until it ceased to beat"."I love you immensly and I only desire you and your love and your body and I just can not get enough of you" So please baby, give me you when I want you-I know that you are tired or may not feel like it,but anything that I can do to help you day or just let some of the things go sometimes because baby I want you!"
See if this works and you be willing to assist her with what ever excuse she gives so you can get it when you want it and how you want it! Sometimes it only take a little bit of compassion to warm ladies hearts! Be wise!
2007-03-23 18:39:28 · answer #1 · answered by Arene 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
We women are complicated, but I guess you already know that! The problem might be when you are asking her and how you are asking her. Men often make the mistake of thinking when we are stressed out or upset, that sex is going to make us feel better. It's a huge stress reliever for men...but for women, for the most part, we don't have sex to solve our emotional issues.
Try different ways of approaching her and look at when you are asking. Maybe she just would like some conversation and flirting before you dive into that. Plus...if you can make it spontaneous, it helps. In other words, just be intimate with her and progress. Make sure that other factors aren't involved when you want to make love. For example, bad day at work? Talk to her first. Kids driving her crazy? Be a participating and compassionate partner. Is she exhausted? You need to wait.
Above all, talk to her. Women appreciate you actually listening to them. Not hear...listen. If she truly knows you are listening to what is important to her, she will open up more and respond more readily when you want to be intimate.
2007-03-24 01:31:31 · answer #2 · answered by Smooch The Pooch 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think you should talk to your wife about it. I know from experience that it can end up leading to a lot of other problems if it continues or gets worse. It sounds like there are times when she initiates though, which is good, so I wouldn't complain too much if I were you.
2007-03-24 02:30:51 · answer #3 · answered by Canadian Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do you show her affection outside of the bedroom? do you just stop her in the hall or the kitchen and give her a kiss just because? it doesn't have to be a total make-out session, just a kiss, rub her shoulders, actually look her in the eye and ask her how her day was. little things like this might help.
showing affection towards each other outside the bedroom went a long way in bringing my husband and i back to each other when we were on the verge of divorce.
2007-03-24 01:37:08 · answer #4 · answered by fluttering_by@sbcglobal.net 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are right, it's like your dammed if you do and your dammed if you don't .When my husband isn't home I think about what we are going to do when he gets home but as soon as he walks in the door something happens. He farts or picks his nose or belches and that is it .Talk about mood change.
2007-03-24 01:40:04 · answer #5 · answered by Teenie 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
We have the same situation,but he never quits asking and it turns me off.When i tell him to wait for me to ask,he says it takes forever.Very different sex drive here and it's very stressfull for both of as.
2007-03-24 01:27:39 · answer #6 · answered by avavu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The woman should ask or initiate it sometimes. It keeps things "spicy" and that is what it is all about. Hubba! Hubba!
2007-03-24 01:32:25 · answer #7 · answered by Raspberry 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
they're just crazy, deal with it
2007-03-24 01:37:48 · answer #8 · answered by Seamus S 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋