How do I strongly encourage my husband to get a job? I have threatened to leave ( he starts looking then quits after 2 days). No nookie......(he went a long time without any). Also he doesnt seem to want to shower or brush his teeth......How can I tell him in a nice loving manner he stinks?! He is the perfect guy for me ....just tooooooo lazy. He is 23 and I am 28.
2007-03-23 18:05:02 · 19 answers · asked by luckybeauty2006 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hummmmmmmmm, you must be married to my ex-husband. He sounds delightful. He needs to grow up. It is time for tough love you can't work yourself to death while supporting him.
When I was in your situation I looked at it this way. There is less laundry to do and you get the whole bed to yourself.
2007-03-23 18:17:10 · answer #1 · answered by MS. O 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lazy Husband?
2014-12-16 00:09:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being a workaholic, I can't even conceive of someone not even wanting a job! Your best bet is to either get used to it, or, stop threatening and DO something! He obviously thinks you are a push over. Then again, there is the option of writing out a resume' for him and YOU go get him a job! This way all you have to tell him is if he quits or gets fired, not to come back. Getting a job is child's play, keeping one even easier. If this is a character trait, that's when he will show it. If it is blatant laziness then in the long run it's best to kiss him goodbye or kiss your heart goodbye!
2007-03-23 18:18:45 · answer #3 · answered by delux_version 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is he just staying home doing nothing? My husband was out of job for a long time. He was very depressed and yes he did not care to brush his teeth. Since I had a stable job, I did not pressure him to find a job. I gave him a lot of suggestions and encouragements. After a few months, he got tired of staying home and decided to look for a job. He found a few jobs but did not like any of them. Finally, he decided to go back to school. I've been the single income for the family since 2 years ago and probably for a few more years. A lot of times, men think they deserve a much better job than what they can get. If you have a stable income, then let him take his time finding a job that he likes. If you have trouble making ends meet, then tell him he needs to get any job right away and look for a better one in the mean time.
2007-03-23 23:56:40 · answer #4 · answered by miserable 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How Can I Build Up My Husband's Ego?
2015-12-11 03:48:47 · answer #5 · answered by ? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a little confused here. How can he be perfect for you if he makes you support him and isn't being a supportive partner? I would set a deadline. He must have a full time job by such and such a date. You could add that if he doesn't he will find his bags packed and sitting outside the door as you are the one paying the bills he will be the one going. I hope others have additional help in this.
2007-03-23 18:11:15 · answer #6 · answered by kaykib320 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he sounds like he's in a little or a lot of depression.....not that you can make him go, but have you talked to him about getting help?
is he possibly using a controlled substance? if the not working, showering or brushing his teeth are newly formed "habits" then something has changed in his life....find out what it is. most people don't go from being a "normal", functioning adult to being a slob overnight.
if these aren't new habits then he probably won't change, regardless of how much you harp, *****, nag or do all the lovely wife things we wives tend to do.
good luck!
2007-03-23 18:25:26 · answer #7 · answered by fluttering_by@sbcglobal.net 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You had me ready to stone him with the closest rock, until you mention the hygiene. I hope he is not suffering from depression cause thats what it sounds like! Please don't take this the wrong way but is withholding "the nookie" a mature way to get your point across? Its something special that people share together & I'm not sure it should be used as a torment tactic. Please have him seen by your DR.
Just to make sure if its a case of the dulldrums or not.
Good luck
2007-03-23 18:26:53 · answer #8 · answered by ☆♥•´`•.¸ ;-) •´`•.¸ ♥☆ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is obviously very depressed with strong feelings of worthlessness. It's also hard for him to take the balance of power shift in the relationship. You make the money, you have the power. He's got to keep looking for a job and learn not to take the rejections personally. He needs to start networking with friends, and relatives to find a job.
2007-03-23 18:26:32 · answer #9 · answered by sol_s_99 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not sure that this perfect guy for you is all that perfect if he won't work, shower or brush his teeth. I say dump him and let him be on his own. He has some more growing up to do.
2007-03-23 18:41:52 · answer #10 · answered by Blitz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋