I thought of the last line, so i quickly wrote it down and just started adding to it: P.S Im only 13 so sorry if its not that great heeh
It’s hard for me to live my life
Knowing that you love her
It’s hard for me to understand
That soon you’ll love another
One day I will confront you
And tell you my secret
Hopefully if you don’t care
The least you can do is keep it
This day I tell you holds the memory that will last forever
And I’m praying that this day
We will be happy and get together
After I told you, you had a deep stare
I knew once again, it wouldn’t be fair
My eyes started tearing, my face turning red
Tonight I knew that I’d be crying in bed
I nodded, pretending to be okay
I walked away and I heard you say
Baby, I love you too
2007-03-23 15:55:02 · 12 answers · asked by cosmo_girl! 3 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Philosophy
I never show my poems like this to anyone because they are very personal hehe. In class we do poetry and im pretty good with it B+ but I dont write about this kind of topic because its just personal to me and its weird for my teacher to read it so thats probably why my mark is a bit lower than other things I do. I tend to write about animals lmao
2007-03-23 16:07:50 · update #1
very nice, keep writing- you have a real talent.
2007-03-23 16:03:12 · answer #1 · answered by johntindale 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's good. Considering you're only 13 it's very good. Keep writing. You will get better over time. With poetry the important thing is to express emotion vividly. Use more description & imagery. Read a lot of poetry (Margaret Atwood etc) and eventually you develop your own style. You obviously have a good sense of rhyming. But all poetry doesn't have to rhyme. Experiment with it. You're off to a good start!
You're so young that by the time you're 20 you may be an accomplished poet, published many times! I've had a few poems published in literary journals but I had many rejections before then. & out of the thousands of poems I've written, less than 50 are really powerful. Write quantity & eventually you get quality.
Poetry is great therapy. Writing your feelings gets them out of you. I understand you not wanting to share them all because they are so intensely personal. It was brave of you to share one here with us!
Keep writing! Good luck!
:)
2007-03-24 00:32:39 · answer #2 · answered by amp 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow! That is such a good poem! And dont be afraid or shy to write these kinds of poems in class. I know it may feel akward or uncomfortable at first, but you should really let out your emotions and feelings out on paper. Great poem! It was very heart touching and I loved it!
2007-03-24 01:28:38 · answer #3 · answered by Amber Cossio 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it isnt bad actually, is it from personal experience?
if it is you have a much different life than i did at your age. but that is neither here nor there.
continue to write poetry and as you grow older and your vocabulary grows you will be more able to portray your emotions and thoughts and your poetry will improve in your eyes and others. also give music a try, it is one of major regrets at this stage in my life that i did not play guitar or something. it along with poetry can really make a difference to yourself and others
2007-03-23 23:08:13 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pretty deep for a 13 yr old, but yes it is very good!
2007-03-23 23:04:08 · answer #5 · answered by Heatha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not bad, i like it but i think some of your lines could be arranged a bit differently but then that is just my opinion. Nice job.
2007-03-25 14:37:20 · answer #6 · answered by Roxy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Vary Good!
2007-03-23 23:01:39 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes i thought that was beautiful girl you have talent i think it was very good and heart touching
2007-03-23 22:59:45 · answer #8 · answered by wouldnt u l 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you LOVE someone! aw, thats nice and humble. get it pubished and earn some $$$!(ba-ling bling!)
2007-03-23 23:04:49 · answer #9 · answered by SpaceMonkey! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds emo
2007-03-23 23:08:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋