Is it wrong for a guy to offer to walk a girl to her car? Is it okay for a girl to refuse his offer?

Question

After the beating I took from women for asking this
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Aj_eefkTFaDp0LJQt4NlV0jsy6IX?qid=20070322102428AA14gLn
question, I’d like to know where the problem occurs with this logic…

1) Does having someone (even a woman) next to you LESSEN the chances of you being raped in a parking garage?
2) Do the scumbag men who rape women respect men more than women?
3) Does it not therefore follow that a man walking with a woman will get more respect from the scumbag than if two women were walking together?

4) Is it better to be insulted or to be raped?
5) Isn’t it better to be safe than sorry?
6) Do you care if you getting hurt affects the people you love?

I hope you at least follow my logic. If you disagree with my conclusion that it’s proper for a man to offer escort a female friend and it’s also proper for the girl to accept (since she has a responsibility to make sure she doesn't come to harm), PLEASE explain to me which of these is wrong

A LOOOOOOT of you are ignoring the last point:
6) Do you care if you getting hurt affects the people you love?

You have a responsibility to protect yourself from harm for the sake of your loved ones. If a guy walking you to your car means you get there safely, then you should do so. The girls I walk to their car trust me. But they frequently say “no thank you.” It’s not fear of me that prompts them to say no. I think that is not only foolhardy, it is also extremely rude; not only to my attempt at being a gentleman, but its also rude to their loved ones. To treat her own safety so casually isn’t right. She's not the ONLY person that suffers if she gets hurt.

Blast. I forgot to add one more point.

7) Is it better to be a woman and beat a guy up or have friendly company while you walk to your car?

Baba Yaga, are you going to answer the question or just berate the people who actually do take the time to read the question?

Answer 1

No, I don't think it's wrong. Granted, if you are a stranger, they will probably have cause for alarm, but you don't seem to be talking about perfect strangers. In any event, look at it this way; people that are worth protecting will acknowledge your offer, or at least defer you in a decent manner. Those who aren't worth it will completely dismiss you or become offensive. If they REALLY want to take up that response, let them. You gave an offer; it's their fault if they decide they don't want your help. Of course, you could ask two or three times just to make sure; at least then you know you did the best you could. (God knows some of them would probably press charges if you kept trying to help...)

EDIT: That's quite an obsession you have with me, Baba Yaga. I gave a reply in the "Do men make more money than women" topic; go read there.

"Encourage your male friends and family that sexist or misogynistic jokes are not funny and only perpetuate inferior and degrading beliefs about women."

Then the same should be done to women. Maybe if they didn't have the attitudes they had, men would have the attitudes they have. Whenever I call someone a *****, I do so because of the behavior I have observed them partake in/the words I have heard them speak (some about how men are worthless, pigs, or the like- a few at the age of 15-16, no less).

Furthermore, some women laugh at jokes about cutting penises off. Shouldn't we stop THOSE attitudes too?

Freedom of speech is freedom of speech, and ANYTHING can be funny given certain conditions. Whoopi Goldberg used abortion jokes, made the audience laugh, and then told them "Think of what you're laughing at." By the same token, some women laugh at jokes about cutting penises off. Shouldn't we stop THOSE attitudes too?

Answer 2

There is nothing wrong with asking a women if you can walk her to her car. That is very sweet. She does have the right to say no. I don't know the situation though. Does she know you or are you a stranger? If she knows you, it's goofy to get upset with you. If you're a stranger, women have to be careful that way. I can say I used to be "Feminazi" for a little while after I dated two bad guys. I'd get all upset when I guy would open the door for me or something else nice like that. I learned to chill out. Life's too short. If a guy does something nice for me, I thank him. If I get to the door first, I open it for him. No biggie.

Answer 3

I said it in the last question and I'll say it again:

Do more to STOP RAPE from happening. Do more to stop your fellow male members of society from raping women. Encourage your male friends and family that sexist or misogynistic jokes are not funny and only perpetuate inferior and degrading beliefs about women. Do more to stop the spread of sexism and misogyny because that is where rape is really born. Stop rape from happening by quelling the misogyny that is prevalent in this patriarchal society.

I mean, it's great that you are concerned for your friends safety, but you are focusing on defending your friend from a potential threat rather than taking on and dealing with the threat itself.

Stop rape from happening. Period.

Answer 4

It is valiant of you to want to walk a woman to her car.
I appreciate it very much when a guy walks me out to my car at night. That said, I would not appreciate just ANY GUY doing so. I do not trust EVERYONE.
Your logic is faulty, though, because you are still expecting the woman to agree/comply with you.
The woman does not necessarily know you/or want you to do so, however.
In that case, to force the issue makes you look frighteningly similar to a rapist.
Do you see the connection?----forcing ones' self on another is wrong!! Be the person male, female, old, young, whatever.
It matters not what your reason, justification, etc., is:
NO MEANS NO
Good luck

Answer 5

well... i personally don't like walking alone ESPECIALLY in the middle of the night. i've heard enough stories and i wouldn't want any of that to happen to me.

i think that yes, having someone else next to you does lessen the chance of any harm coming to you. man or woman. rapists aren't going to go and attack two people, unless they're stupid or have a weapon... but even then, the other person could excape and get them caught. so it just doesn't make sense.

so i guess... i agree with you. lol.

Answer 6

No it is not wrong for a guy to walk a woman to her car especially during the night. No it is not ok for a girl to refuse his offer. Having a man next to you might lessen a woman's chance of being raped but another woman just makes it easier for the rapist. No they don't respect either. Yes it does. Insulted. Safe yes. Yes I do.

Answer 7

It's not "wrong." You were thinking of your friend...that's always a nice thing to do. You make valid points. MY point was that you should respect her choices...they ARE hers to make. Of course you worry...nothing wrong with that. But I don't think she was wrong to decide for herself...and make a choice you don't agree with. She is a grown woman, and you can't always be there to "protect" her. The point is, agree or not, right or wrong, SHE ultimately decides what is "best" for her, whether it's the best thing or not. As you said, it is her responsibility...it's not yours. And you can disagree, but you can't change it.

Answer 8

I don't think either is wrong; it is okay for the guy to offer, but it is okay for the girl to decline the offer...you shouldn't be offended! Yes, it is better to be safe than sorry but if you are not comfortable with the guy offering (and if the guy offering gets upset) then it is just fine...maybe the woman knows how to defend herself or has maze in her purse...

Answer 9

I think you need to have somebody waking with you to your car in the middle of the night anywhere!! But you need to know who is walking you!! YOu might want to have someone you know well and not your new BF cause you don't know what people will do these days!! BECAREFUL!!

Answer 10

I think you're being a gentleman for offering, but it is her right to refuse.

Thing is it's really hard to trust people in this day and age. We get told that there are rapists lurking everywhere.