plz advise
xx
2007-03-23 12:12:31 · 28 answers · asked by pixiexxpixiexpixie 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
talk to him about the future - adoption / fostering / IVF etc. But try not to make him feel any worse about the fact he can't have kids. Depends on your age in a way. Don't ignore the fact you want kids - it will only lead to resentment in the future.
2007-03-23 12:16:53 · answer #1 · answered by Smiler 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're upset about this, think of how he must feel. Try and sort something out. There are other ways of having children. Talk to him about this.
...and to "just a friend", how can you criticise "rught", u is clearly rite next to i on the keyboard, it doesn't take a genius to realise that. Secondly it's just the internet. There's no reason to write in perfect grammar. Gosh! I just can't stand you people. Just answer the question.
Sorry, it's a bit long with the thing at the bottom.
2007-03-23 13:54:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a very hard situation. I am glad you sought advice first. I often dream that one day I will find out that I can't have kids and that it will limit my possible love interest. Well here is my advice:
Consider adoption. If you truly love this man and he is good for and to you then do't ruin it because of something he or you can't change. Another thing I would suggest is prayer. Prayer changes things! It's hard, but I will pray for you all too. YOu never know what can happen. There is a woman in the bible who couldn't have kids...She did. God will bless the loyal!
2007-03-23 12:18:14 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love him, and he loves you, and you're meant to be together, DO NOT let the chance that he can't have children stop you from marrying him. I know plenty of people who have been told that, but guess what, they had natural children.
God is STILL in the miracle working business, and if He means for the two of you to have a child, you will have one, no matter what a physician says.
Also, there are MANY children who desperately need a home. Become a foster parent and perhaps adopt. If you focus on others, the stress of potentially not having one will go away, and who knows, stress might actually be the one thing that was keeping you from getting pregnant.
If you love each other marry him - regardless...put yourself in his shoes...what if you couldn't have children and he told you "I love you, but I want kids...see ya!" You wouldn't like that, and neither would he. Put your feelings aside for now. Trust the Lord. All will work out as it should be.
2007-03-23 12:19:28 · answer #4 · answered by japanizationstation1 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i think its very important to take a lot of time thinking about this one. although you may not want kids now if you are def sure you want them in the future there could be a lot of heartache.
of course you can try to adopt but the the problem there is what happens if for some reason you aren't able to adopt?
do you think you could go through life without children? because if not you could end up resenting him.
im in a similar position myself, my boyfriend has to be tested because of poss infertility, but i know 100% it would'nt matter if we couldn't have kids, i personally think if you cant say 100% it would be OK you will need to split.
xx
2007-03-23 12:57:57 · answer #5 · answered by tj 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Adopt or foster. Or if you want your own (and he doesn't mind) sperm donor. DONT DITCH THE BOY FRIEND ITS NOT HIS FAULT. if you love him enough you'll make that sacrifice. How would you expect him to feel if you couldn't have kids and he could? Would you expect him to stay with you? Partners are for better, for worse..........
(and to the muppets who think you cant spell "rught" is a typo the rest is text language)
2007-03-23 12:24:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to talk to him about the situation. And if you are sure, you do want to have your own child, then I would move on. I am wondering how you found out that he can't have kids.
You will need to talk with him about this in a truly honest way. This may not be the guy you need if your mind is made up about having your own child.
2007-03-23 12:20:50 · answer #7 · answered by Jan C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either stay with him as he's the man you love, and try other ways off having children, i.e. lots of kids out there need adopting. Or move on and hope that you find another man that you care so deeply about.
2007-03-23 12:31:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say find out for sure he doesn't want children ever, then if you really do, I would suggest changing you relationship to a platonic friendship and move on. The subject of children will aways be a conflicting issue between you, and it is one of the most important decisions you make in life.
2007-03-23 12:31:37 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want kids in the future ,it can happen you seem in love with your boyfriend ,just carry on the way use are don't stop loving one another ,then maybe if it fine with your boyfriend get a donation if use are ready for that ,never say use can't have kids .
2007-03-23 12:48:43 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋