If someone you know was previously experiencing dv, and had their children removed because of it.They then get their children back because she is no longer with the violent partner. After a year she has him back.... what would you do?
2007-03-23 10:28:40 · 32 answers · asked by tinker33 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I dont care a toss about the woman, shes an idiot for letting her kids be taken away anyway.
I cannot imagine how ANY MOTHER, woman could let this happen, she is putting her children at risk, not only at witnessing the physical abuse, but the verbal abuse too.
what a VERY sad way for the children to grow up.
I hope her children are taken away and given the chance to become stable adults in a loving and caring environment
NO CHILD should have to go through that.
she should choose her children or the Monster, if she chooses the monster, then she is JUST as bad as him.
an ANGRY man that abuses and hits a woman, will NEVER change, hes got NO respect for himself, his partner and any other living person.
The children were taken away obviously for a good reason, for gods sake, what does he have to do for anyone to realise they are all in danger, does it have to hit the news?
2007-03-23 10:36:14 · answer #1 · answered by looby 6 · 5⤊ 2⤋
I would ask her if she had fogotten the prior year I guess and rmind her of the things that she and her kids had to go through to get to the point that they are at then so maybe she would realize she can do things without a partner in life. I am a single dad of 3 teens myself, and it's rough out here lol. I'd really talk to her as a man and let her know that a man shouldn't do stuff like beat a womam or kids.
2007-03-23 10:53:52 · answer #2 · answered by T J 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Defintely keep a eye on the situation, I lived in an abusive relationship for over 9 years, it does not usually get better. I stayed because the excuse I used was I did not want my children to grow up without a father like I did, it hurt them more by me staying with all they saw. I became an addict and ended up in prison so they wound up being raised by my mom, which has done a wonderful job. So who wins?
2007-03-23 13:44:12 · answer #3 · answered by Angela K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is still violent and you know this for a fact, you need to ask your friend what on earth she is thinking!!! If she gives you the old "but he says he won't do it ever again" routine, tell her she needs help and her kids should not be with him. If she still insists it's all good, walk away from the situation, wait a few days or more (unless he is violent then call right away) so she does not know it is you, and call the authorities. We, as adults, are to protect the innocent from harm - if we ignore it, we are guilty for allowing it.
2007-03-23 10:54:05 · answer #4 · answered by BikerChick 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Monitor the situation first. He may have had counselling for his behaviour. Some people do learn and actually mend their ways butsadly most don't. At the first sign of dv then alert the authorities. It seems starnge she has taken him back after a year but that indicates that something has changed I would suggest.
2007-03-23 11:56:02 · answer #5 · answered by Closed Down 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If I know for sure that the domestic violence is not going on in that house, then I would not do anything. Now on the other hand, if I know that The violence is still going on, I would call the authorities, in a heart beat, and get the abuser out of the house. and no one has to know that you was the one that called!
2007-03-23 10:35:11 · answer #6 · answered by roseannetb@verizon.net 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to hear that I would let the authorities know what is going on. Personally I wouldn't want any kid to be around a situation like that. If these were arrangements of her gwetting her kids back then this should be looked into by the authorities because she could be breaking a court order.
2007-03-23 10:33:20 · answer #7 · answered by Livinrawguy 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If she took him back after all those beatings , then they need to take the children back out of a home that is dangerous for them. Someone needs to report that she is back with the abuser and let them pick the children back up before one of them gets hurt or killed.
2007-03-23 10:33:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
If the children are in danger, I would report it. Other than that, I would let it alone.
You need to understand that no one can change anyone. You can only change how you react to them.
People seek out partners who will give them what they are looking for even if it's unhealthy. For example, an alcoholic will usually seek out another alcoholic for a partner. If one of them begins recovery, the other will very often leave the relationship to hookup with another alcoholic.
It is the same with someone being abused. They will look for someone to abuse them UNLESS they get help to find out why they want to be abused.
But you have to remember that they need to do this themselves.
2007-03-23 10:34:57 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Honestly, for the sake of the kids, tell someone close enough to remove them, themselves - or report the situation.
If they find out that the abuser is back in the picture they will be moved anyways. This may only look like one cycle, but that still makes it a cycle and she needs help to get out of it.
2007-03-23 10:33:56 · answer #10 · answered by cab99smilin 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋