Hi, I am a man who has had a gender reassignment. I am now a woman, and am married to a man. He does not know that I have had this procedure, and I do not want him to find out. The problem is: we've been trying to have a child (I know I cannot, but he does not). I have faked several pregnancies/ miscarrages, in hopes of maintaining legitimacy. The problem is, he still wants to try. I just want to adopt, and maybe fake a steraliztion surgery. How do I tell him this without revealing my former self?
2007-03-23 10:15:08 · 21 answers · asked by idugh 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yawn, obvious troll.
2007-03-23 10:50:06 · answer #1 · answered by ajtheactress 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You can't keep lying to him.A marriage basted on lies will never last.And has far has the faking miscarriages goes.I know you are trying desperately to save your marriage.But being a woman whom has suffered a miscarriage.I don't appreciate you making a mockery of what I and other woman have went through.By lying about having one.It is a devastating tragedy to go through.And you should never use such things has an excuse for your not being able to have a baby.It is wrong.And if your husband really wants a baby think of the heart ache you put him through.Making him think that he was going to have a child and then telling him it died.You should be ashamed of yourself.
2007-03-23 17:23:21 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are so wrong. How could you do this to someone? I thought it was bad my first husband married me and did not tell me his is gay, but you take the cake. What you have dne is beyond terrible and you should be ashamed. You have done this man an injustice, and what you did was the epitome of lying and deceipt. I suggest you tell him NOW. This is not fair to him at all. How would you feel to discover he is really a woman changed to a man? No,don't answer that. But how would you feel if you found out he lied to you about something major? What a manipulative, cheating person you are.
2007-03-23 17:20:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is that old saying, "Liar liar pants on fire, hook yourself on a telephone wire." Except for the telephone wire, maybe wrap it around your neck---what the hell were you thinking?? Hopefully this question is bogus and that you don't really mean it. But if it is real, how dare you take it upon yourself to ruin someone's life. Oh well, it is good to know that you will more than likely go to hell for this. This is something that cannot be forgiven.
When you are in hell, give Saddam a good ol' bit ch slap--he needs those.
2007-03-23 19:59:23 · answer #4 · answered by jesterthemutt2006 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should not have gotten married without being totally honest. This can only end in disaster. It is not fair to the man you married. How would you feel if you married the opposite sex of what you wanted to be married to. Trust and honesty are extremely important in a marriage.
2007-03-23 17:21:16 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're marriage is a lie. If you truly love this person, then you need to be honest. It's going to shock the heck out of him, but you have to tell the truth. Most likely the marriage will be annulled for fraud. You made a huge change in your life and you need to be honest with anyone you potentially have a relationship with.
But then if you're lying about this, then you need help.
2007-03-23 17:20:38 · answer #6 · answered by 2Beagles 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK so your entire marriage is a lie.
And you want to bring a child into this situation? I don't think so, sister.
That said, just tell him that trying is draining you completely emotionally and that you would like to give it up and go for adoption. If he loves you, he will quit pressing. Quit faking and lying to your spouse.
2007-03-23 17:20:51 · answer #7 · answered by kramerdnewf 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry but you should not have married under false pretenses. Your marriage is based on one HUGE lie, that is so wrong.
The best of marriages, open, honest, loving marriages have a huge failure rate. Let alone marriages that are all betrayal and lies.
Hopefully in the next marriage, because this one is destined to fail, you will learn and be more honest.
2007-03-23 18:50:55 · answer #8 · answered by Steffi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow you have dug a hole for yourself but i understand its to late to tell him the truth now.id tell him that after all the troubles youve had its unlikely that you will conceive again.but be prepared that one day he may find out the real truth,if you really love him and he wants children that badly maybe you should let him go so he has the chance to find happiness elsewhere and then you can go and start a relationship which is founded on truth.
2007-03-23 17:49:25 · answer #9 · answered by toto 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How can you keep this from someone you love. Don't you think it would be so much easier to just tell the truth instead of lieing? Would you want to be lied too? I think you should tell him, if he is uncomfortable with who you use to be then it was not ment to be. But keeping this secret is not fair to him either.
2007-03-23 17:21:26 · answer #10 · answered by Va princess 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How sad that you can't be honest about the person you are to the one you are supposed to love the most.
I feel sorry for your husband if you tricked him like that.
And sad enough I know a few men like you that would do that just to make themselves happy.
How selfish you are!
2007-03-23 17:23:23 · answer #11 · answered by Valentina 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋