Should I ask my wife's permission? Kind of like an open marriage situation. I love my wife and want to spend the rest of my life, but I need variety right now. Are some women open minded enough to accept this?
2007-03-23 04:24:49 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
As a wife who loves her husband, I would consider an open relationship if that's what he wanted.....provided he was honest...which it seems you wish to be....and there were ground rules, boundaries....respect.....if it were just physical and not emotional....I would of course need to approve of whom he was with and vise versa...and would insist on protection...but otherwise...why not!? She may be craving more variety too, you never know!?
For me, honesty is always the best policy. If she leaves you over you being honest in a loving and respectful way....you could live with that, but it would be difficult to live with the dark cloud of guilt hanging over your head if you cheat and lie.....
just my opinion though!
2007-03-23 10:36:48 · answer #1 · answered by LoveBiologist 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Marriage just isnt the same these days....now it is pretty much meaningless. Sex from other women?? What is wrong from having sex with only your wife?? The fact that you are even asking this question is enough reason for me to believe that you know that this is wrong. If you ask your wife do you really think that she would go for it?? If you hide it from her she will either find out or you will live with guilt for the rest of your life. The "but I need a variety right now" is really disturbing. It sounds like you are at Baskin Robins wanting to sample all 31 flavors. Like women are some kind of food eat and toss away the left overs. How would you feel if you were not doing it for your wife and she decided to seek attention elsewhere wouldnt be too great would it. You might have a fit. Really consider what you are doing here you could be ruining the rest of your life. And if you have children how would they think of their father doing such things. I would loose all respect for you as a man. Really try to think about this and give it good thought and think if its really worth it.
2007-03-23 14:02:52 · answer #2 · answered by Sweetheart 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No. You have to set up an open relationship from the start. If you have a traditional marriage and try to open it up, it tells her she isn't enough for you. Unless she is trying to play the field too, asking for that would be the beginning of the end.
If you plan to have her babysit the kids while you go out on the town, that goes double. People who have successful open relationships bend over backward to make their lovers know how special they are, and it doesn't sound like you are going to be able to do that.
Look at yourself carefully--your urge for variety probably indicates a problem. Did you feel you didn't have enough variety before you married? Are you not attracted to your wife? I think there is a problem here that is bigger than normal male urges, and either you or both you and your wife need to work that problem out.
2007-03-23 11:32:32 · answer #3 · answered by wayfaroutthere 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
The short of it is your better off to get a divorce now, it'll be cheaper to say you just don't love her, than to load a gun for her in court by saying I want your marriage but sex with everyone else.
You do that just give her the checkbook and the house and the car, are you picking up what I'm laying down?
How would you feel if she came to you and said your just not big enough for me, I need it bigger, different shapes,sizes, colors I'll come home to you when I finish with each one of the other men, hell we can have sex when I walk through the door, before I shower, sounds a Lil disgusting huh?
And you want to present your plan to your wife? Be careful what you wish for, it could bite you in the ***. And speaking of asses how would you feel to come home to hairy asses in your bed on your counter top, in your favorite chair.
Instead of variety, you need some counseling right now, because your on the fast track to F^cked up. When some big bastard named Bubba open your front door to let you in you may then realize, your bright idea was a burnt out bulb.
Because unless I'm writing to Brad Pitt or Pres. Clinton. Your wife could have 15 men to your 1 woman, It's not good odds.
Between the both of your friends, everyone of your friends would bang her, and she may have one friend that would do you.
2007-03-23 11:47:09 · answer #4 · answered by walker9842 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Some women are open-minded enough to accept this. Really, though, that's the only way to do it, if you really love and respect your wife. Come out & tell her what you feel, keeping in mind that she has her own feelings and opinions, too.
2007-03-23 12:08:15 · answer #5 · answered by Maureen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sir, I know that most men has fantasy, but do you have any idea what might happen if you do what you want to do?..you said you love your wife and you want to have an open marriage, do you think your wife will respect you for asking her that? If this is what I wanted to have variety of sex with diff. men, I wouldn't marry my husband,cause I know that it will be a sin.
Fantasy is fantasy, but reality will always be reality sir. You may want to delete my response to you but most women that can and will read your problem,will tell you the same idea that I have,.................good luck!!
2007-03-23 11:50:26 · answer #6 · answered by islandgirl06 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you knew you were going to want sex from other women, why did you marry your wife? If you even think of another woman sexually whether you are married or not it is a SIN.
Do not approach your wife with this nonsense. Go buy you some X.Rated movies and you know the rest. Do not cheat on your wife. If you feel you have to cheat before you get too old then cheat by yourself and give her a divorce.
So I guess you think it is okay while she sits around and is faithful to you huh? What if the tables were in reverse? Go talk to your Pastor or Reverend PLEASE!!!
2007-03-23 11:32:05 · answer #7 · answered by Christina 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
if you ask permission and then she says no are you gonna anyways? Remember that when you ask her you are gonna make her not trust you because the thought will be there that you might cheat. you can talk to her and see if she feels the need to have sex with other men. If you need variety why don't you ask her to do different things, wear a wig, meet you at the local motel. you can have variety with the same woman.
2007-03-23 11:34:22 · answer #8 · answered by bubbles 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I do not think any wife would be open minded enough to understand, fair is fair, how would you feel about another man making love to her, and kissing and touching her, and pleasing her in every way imaginable? you are being immature, set her free, as some other man will be true to her, and love her without wanting other women. Your love for her is half ***-ed.
2007-03-23 11:31:54 · answer #9 · answered by Maria A. 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Casually mention open marriage style to her and see how she feels about it. If she is against it than you have 2 choices, either live like you are are find yourself a sex partner. Maybe take her to a swingers club in your city to start the topic off - who knows she might be into swinging too and then both of you get your fantasies fulfilled.
2007-03-23 11:32:02 · answer #10 · answered by redneckgirl 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋