We paid a great dowry for my promised wife, she must be of pure body, mind and soul for this union to succeed.
There has been rumours about her seeking the company of a certain man. He has dressed as a woman to get into the compound by night, leaving early in the morning. This is as far as my investigations have led.
I have thought about demanding a medical examination before the union, but am unsure, it may appear weak and disorganised for something like this to have happened.
How can I tell if my wife is still pure on the night of our wedding?
2007-03-23 03:43:08 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
What she thinks about it is not of concern, but you are right about needing trust, this is why I need to find out for sure
2007-03-23 03:49:59 · update #1
what does she say about it? you need trust for marriage...
2007-03-23 03:47:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Okay, I have no idea what culture or religion you are from, but here goes fram my point of view.
Women are not chattel. If the only way you can have her is to buy her, then she isn't yours to have. A wife should be able to care for and support you, and you should be able to listen to her advice when making decisions. If you are not going to just ask her whether she is a virgin, then it seems like there is no point in starting a marriage.
If she really does have a boyfriend, I'm sure she doesn't want to have to sneak around for the rest of her life to see him. Just ask her if she wants to marry you, or if her family is forcing her. If she wants to enter into the marriage, tell her that it is essential for you both to trust each other. This means that you will both promise not to sleep with anybody else. If she says she wants to marry you, but she is not a virgin, get over it. She may repent what happened in the past and want to start a lasting and faithful marriage to you.
If you can't bring yourself to ask her, or if you don't trust her answer, then no medical examination is going to make your union succeed. What if you got the medical examination, and it proved she was a virgin? Then you would both live the erst of your lives knowing that you didn't trust her.
Anyway, just ask her. It's the best thing to do.
2007-03-23 04:01:24 · answer #2 · answered by tertiahibernica 3 · 10⤊ 0⤋
too late if you will wait for the wedding night. ask for a medical examination. It is fair. A dowry is not a give away for nothing. Donot be fooled. At the wedding night you have no witness to prove you did not fool around. You will lose in the end.
As to the mind and soul, no one has a pure mind and soul except the newly born or insane who cannot think for herself to be guilty of anything.
2007-03-23 03:53:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
For starters it is wrong for you to buying a wife. You are supposed to be marrying her cuz you love her not because you're forcing her to do so. If it was me I would make you think I wasn't pure either. Besides do u believe everything you hear ? If this is true about her seeing someone else then move on and cut your losses, YOU CAN'T BY LOVE. Even though you buy gifts doesn't mean you are trying to buy someone like most people think, you need to show and tell them you care. Sounds to me like you need to set her free, cuz I would be scared that you would be a controlling husband. Then we would have problems, we all put our pants on the same way. You are no better than the next person, doesn't matter if u got money, or what color you are. In answer to your question, most woman bleed a little when you have intercourse for the first time.
2007-03-23 04:02:02 · answer #4 · answered by vicki p 3 · 6⤊ 1⤋
if you mean pure as in virgin. . . . tuff 1 you cant relay on the hem to brake and bleed as it my already happend by natural reasons. rumors are rumors you don't know for sure if whats being said is true and it could just be a wined up. what really matters that when you meet you know you can spend the rest of your life with her and not have the urge to chase other woman. you need trust so i would talk to her making her have a medical will not prove any thing but disrespect for her and will start your marriage rocky
2007-03-23 03:57:24 · answer #5 · answered by dragontears 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Will you be pure on your wedding night?
Try asking her.
If you get syphilis or something else - assuming you dont have it already - then maybe that's a sign she wasnt?
2007-03-23 04:02:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
sorry bill, that was me, she was too gorgeous to allow you to defile her so I did it instead. If she calls my name on your wedding night, just roll with it man. I taught her some new tricks that I am sure you will enjoy. So far as dressing like a woman, it wasn't for sneaking... we just like to do a little role playing, she dresses like a nun for me.
2007-03-23 03:56:55 · answer #7 · answered by mike h 3 · 8⤊ 1⤋
If she doesn't scream the other guy's name when you are "consumating your marriage" I'd say that it is a good sign.
2007-03-23 03:50:52 · answer #8 · answered by nycguy10002 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋