I want my husband to quit his job.?

Question

My husband sells cars. When business is good it is very good and he has the potential to bring home a lot of money. When he doesn't sell anything, he doesn't make anything. He has never brought more than $800 since I've known him. He is a good salesman, has all kinds of awards and such and has been there for 12 years. Things have been very bad lately, and he has not made a paycheck for 3 weeks. He tells me not to worry, everything will be ok. I've known him for 9 months, we've been married for 6 months. My parents have had to help us out with groceries, which hurt his pride a little bit. I also had to go to the grocery store and pass a cold check to get food for the family. I know I could get in trouble for it, but I don't care, I wasn't going to let my family starve. I want him to quit his job at the car lot and get a job that will bring in a steady paycheck. I told him I can't live with him not bringing home anything. Should I just trust him or should he quit?

David, I never said I didn't have a job did I? I work as well. And you try living for 3 weeks with no paycheck and see how you like it.

Ok, I came on here wanting support and all I am getting is people dissing me. First of all, I HAVE A JOB. I just started a new job and I haven't had a paycheck come in yet. Secondly, I don't drive an SUV. I drive a junky old beat up Kia. Thirdly, I do support my husband and I love him with all my heart. It's just that I know he can do much better than the place he is now. I have internet because I am also currently going to school (so that I can get a better job) and some of my classes are online. Internet access is a necessity. We don't have cable tv either. So all of you people who are being judgemental of me can go to h***. Thank you to those who were actually SUPPORTIVE.

Answer 1

While his pride may have been hurt asking your folks to ask for some grocery money, he may get to liking that additional support. I am with you.....he now has a family (whether he met you 5 years ago or 2 months ago and you married) he does need to look for a job that will have a steady paycheck. While one can get comfortable in their position of 12 years, the dynamics of his life changed (he didn't have a wife then). Build up his confidence.....tell him he has great potential to find another job in sales (doesn't have to be cars), maybe an insurance agency or working for a contractor. The awards he has won in 12 years hanging on the wall is not going to keep you warm, fed or put money in the bank.....Maybe your husbands current employer will keep him on part time (he can work a few hours each evening and one weekend day). Good luck to you and your husband!

Answer 2

Well, sales always fluctuates in terms of pay, and moves with business cycles.

That said, a good car salesman should be able to earn a decent living. The economy is pretty good right now. If he wins awards, I'm wondering what the problem is.

Are you living in an area that's economically doing really badly (michigan, etc). You may need to consider moving somewhere where things are growing. Is he selling cars for a company that's going downhill?

He could try moving in to other types of sales, though it would still have the uneven salary. Are there any expenses you could cut back on?

It doesn't help today, but longer term, you _cannot_ live paycheck to paycheck as a salesman. You really have to build up a buffer, and when times are really good, save the money or sink it into things that last (i.e. buying a car outright, that type of thing) while keeping ongoing expenses low.

Good luck to you.

Answer 3

I know how you feel my boyfriend's job is the same way and at first I was sketchy b/c I get a steady paycheck and and worried that if he keeps putting it off that he will never get one. I am going through the same thing right now and I have had to foot the bill for everything. It is hard and I tell him to leave his job go get something better but he loves his job he is a hands on person and I am afraid that he won't ever get a steady paycheck but have some faith in him.....If he is really trying than back him up but if he isn't doing anything than that is an alarm right there. Maybe have him take up a 2nd part time job to bring something in or if you have to support the family see if you coud take up a side job. If he eventaully does get paid now you know how it is so maybe start putting something little by little away in case this happens again. Good luck!!

Answer 4

1-you do NOT pay 25% taxes - only the top few $1000 of taxable income are in the 25% tax bracket 2- -no you won't be any better - you will be A LOT worse off by however much he takes on in his paycheck, which is probably $300-330+ a week - you would be taking a $1200+ per month PAY CUT after taxes - do you even have $1200 left each month after paying all your bills? I seriously doubt it. no matter how much or how little you make you still take home SOMETHING - you act like his paycheck is ZERO - that's not true every dollar you make is NOT taxed at 25% - the first X amount is taxed at 10%, the the next Y amount is taxed at 15%, etc I grossed over $100,000 last yr and paid less than 15,000 in federal income tax - less than 15%, but I'm in the 25% tax bracket - any ADDITIONAL money I made would have been taxed at 25% - but I still wind up with the majority of that additional income in my paycheck

Answer 5

If you love him enough and you trust that things will turn around for him, why don't you get a 2nd job and like one of the posters said, get rid of your high speed internet connection, if it's over 20.00 a month. Do you have cable, cable is expensive. Get rid of it. What type of car are you driving is it an SUV that sucks gas, if so sell it. Can he get a part time job at night to make things meet. There have been times when I 've worked as a grocery store stocker at night. It's the perfect job for someone trying to make ends meet and working two gigs.
You need to rise up to the situation and get motivated, your motivation will motivate your husband to do better.

Answer 6

Why did you marry a guy 3 months after you met him? For that move alone, I think you both are crazy. You need to spend at least a few years with someone before you marry them. I was with my wife for 7 years before we got married, and by the time we got married, we were sure that things would work out.

You married a car salesman, so you either have to live with a car salesman, or get an anullment (because it's only been 6 months). You can't expect him to quit his job for you.

Answer 7

as the old saying goes, you can ask anything, but don't ask if you don't want the answer....

I know this is hard for you.. but you also knew what you were getting yourself into before you married him. He has had this job for 12 years.. who are you to tell him to quit? You said that you had to write a cold check for food, if it is that bad then get rid of the computer and stuff like that, you would have more money. Trust him, he has been doing this job longer then he has been with you and he seems to enjoy it. Keep up this attitude, you wont be married long.

Answer 8

I understand Its hard! I think he should quit. You have to think whats best for the family! I dont think your a bad person for passing a cold check. You did what you had to do!!! As for the other bad answers that people give you dont listen to them! He really needs to work his butt off to get another job and bring in a check! Thats the important thing if he dont want to do that then you need to rethink your marriage. You need a person that will help you. Im not saying hes not but if there is no money coming in from a different job then that should be his sighn to find a new one! I hope this help you!
Good luck!

Answer 9

Although crassly put, I will agree with the first response. Think about, if possible, you getting a job. If anything, a part time job that will help with groceries. Encourage your husband!! He might see the need to change jobs, but is afraid to jump out there and try to find a new one. Don't tell him what you can or can't live with, but show him how things could be with a steady income.

Answer 10

given the big three problems within the automotive business and if's he a real good salesman,encourage him to do something else. Something he really loves to do. It doesn't hurt to change jobs at all. But with the climate these days in the automotive business it wouldn't hurt to get a a much better salaried job.