well it turns out my boyfriend is gay and he chaeated on me with another man. when i broke the news to him he was all pissy liike a little feamle dogg. he said he's no the father but i havn't been with anyone else before. my mom kicked me out of the ouse and my dad left my family when was 4. i have no support and my babby's daddy is gay. i'm not sure if i should drop out of school or not.
i need help. but i might have help from my best frien annie who is 23 and lives on her own and said i could move in. but i'm not sure what to do with this child. abortion or keep. or mabe adoption...
2007-03-23 01:49:32 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
I think you are full of crap and you had nothing better to do than make up this story.
2007-03-23 01:55:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 1⤋
Bless your heart Sweetie:) Things will be o.k. though~just remember that. My daughther (Our only child) got pregnant at 15 too, and it seemed like it would be the end of the World for her & me and her dad. We all cried for a couple days, and then we made a decision that we WOULD get thru this~together~ and make it work! From that time on, that's what we did. You know they say that God has a reason for everything, and sometimes it's hard to figure that out at the time, but it's true. The baby's father is a no good, deadbeat dad that hasn't helped ANY. I'm sorry your Mom isn't there for you, hopefully she'll come around quick, and be there for you. I was a Grandma at 37, now our G'daughter is almost 9 and the biggest blessing in our lives:) (We also now have a 2 year old G'son and another baby due in 2 months.) You don't need a man in your life to raise a baby...and I would stay away from him if he is gay, and get tested for HIV. I don't believe in abortion. If you don't think you can keep the babies, Adoption would be a better alternative for you, but I think it would be something that you might always regret~you'll just have to decide what will be best for your babies:) I hope your friend Annie sticks by you, and check into getting some help & assistance from Family Services and see what your options are in your area. Whatever you do~DO NOT quit school, that will only make things worse in the long run:) Talk to your school counselor and get some good advice. (Some schools even have daycare now.) This isn't going to be easy, and you will have to grow up faster than you expected, but if you try hard, you CAN do it! And the first time you see those babies, you will experience TRUE LOVE, like you've never felt before:) I wish you the Very Best, and you email me if you want to talk more~
Lis
2007-03-23 02:12:20 · answer #2 · answered by kandl722 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, you should definately NOT drop out of school. Do not let one little mistake ruin your life. If you have to take a temporary break from school, that is understandable. I am sorry that your mother made the mistake of kicking you out, especially at this time in your life, that was definately a mistake. I hope that you will give her another chance to make the right decision. If she can't make the right decision, you do have the option of calling the police to help her make the right decision. I am sorry that your baby's daddy is gay, how did you not notice that in the beginning?
I am glad that you have a friend that you can lean on, God bless her.
I can't advise you on what to do with your babies, but there are school counselors and medical professionals who can advise you and help you come to a decision.
If you chose abortion, you only have a limited time to make that decision. If you already know that you are having twins, it may be too late to make that decision.
If you chose to give them up for adoption, I am sure that some loving parents would appreciate your decision to share your blessing.
If you decide to keep them, good luck and God bless you.
2007-03-23 05:03:48 · answer #3 · answered by ERIC W 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
okay...slow down and take things one day at a time...God has blessed you with these babies even if you are not ready....please think allot about your decision....Children are wonderful blessings and i hope that you do not abort them....I do thank that you should STAY IN SCHOOL! I know that it will be tough ...but if you drop out you will probably never go back because life will soon catch up with you. IF your friend is willing to help ...let her, she sounds like a really great friend who is going to stand by you through thick and thin .... In your case i would probably give the children up for adoption but it is a tough call. Given that you are only 15 and your whole life ahead of you...remember family life will not be easy...it is challenging. Adoption gives your children a great opportunity at life ,if you do not feel that you are ready to be a mother...You could ask for an open adoption so that you can have contact with the new parents and the children and be an active part of their life but, still be able to live your life and stay in school and pursue the dream that you always have wanted.
2007-03-23 02:03:03 · answer #4 · answered by Amber G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are very young. Think real hard about your decision, not only what it will do to you now but the rest of your life. When it come time for it, you may find it real hard if not impossible to give up your babies for adoption. If you do consider abortion let that be your decision. Don't let other people convince you for it or against. I am pro-choice and do believe a woman has a right to make her own decisions in life and about her body. The government and activists should stay out.
I did not want kids and I was sure about that. Now I have a 1 year old who is the best thing in my life but I am 28.
It is a hard decision and you will have to make it on your own.
2007-03-23 02:01:08 · answer #5 · answered by Carmen M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This woman is very nice to even offer you a place, If it were me i would let you figure things out on your own afterall you made the choice to open your legs..
DO NOT DROP OUT OF SCHOOL i'm telling you if you do then your life is ruined and that would be just about the stupidest thing you could do besides getting pregnant at 15..
They have schools for mommies to be and mothers i suggest you look into that however you can stay at your original school but would'nt you feel better being at a school with girls in your same situation or would you rather go to a school where all the kids are going to judge you and disrespect you??
When the baby is born get a paternity test to prove to the babies father that the baby is his and he won't have an option he will have to help you out, hell he can't get off this hook this easily, he to put you in this situation..
Another thing do not abort this child, their are millions of couples out their that cannot conceive a child and would do anything for a baby girl/boy to love and take care of. Your child did not ask for this and it doesn't deserved to be killed, it deserves a great life with lots of love that you obviously cannot give it. So if you think about anything think about adoption, The people you choose to care for and love your baby will be paying for all the expenses doctor visits ect, not to mention you will have loads of time to get to know then and see what their about, that would be the best thing you could ever do for this child...
If you decide to keep it then all i have to say is good luck, just stay in school continue your education. Their is always help out their..My ex friend got pregnant at 15 she went to a school for mothers, graduated. She had alot of help such as welfare yeah i know it sounds bad but it would be just until you can get on your own too feet and support yourself and this baby. They would help with doctor visits, pre natal care, food, housing, and money. They could also help you find a job after you have graduated...
Do the right thing!
2007-03-23 06:29:36 · answer #6 · answered by Kasja 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweety, you are young. I am so sorry you are going through this. I don't recommend abortion if you have any doubts about how you will feel afterwards(especially with twins). I grew up feeling like I was against abortion and the time came after I had my daughter that I needed to exercise my right to choose. Where on one hand, logically, it was what may have "needed" to be done, on the other hand, emotionally and spiritually, I do regret doing it. I still don't recommend abortion if you feel like you will suffer emotionally and spiritually for it. Adoption is definately an option. You can even request, possibly, that they be adopted together.
I wish you all the best, and I pray that everything works out for you. Big hugs.
2007-03-23 01:58:59 · answer #7 · answered by MamiZorro2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW! Your in a situation. But what ever it is that you do you have to be strong. I was a teen mother as well, and I was scared to tell my mom that I was pregnant. I was 14 when I got pregnant and I went to my friends big sister and she took me to get an abortion. Thats how scared I was of my mom putting me out and others talking about me. I also had friends the same age as me and they were not able to do all the things that I was able to do because they needed a sitter or they had no moeny.
I won't tell you what to do, but do whats best for you! If you think you really and honestly can handle this on your own, with no friends, boyfriend, mom, dad or any one else, (cause you will be the sole provider for you and that unborn child) then go for what you know!
Good Luck
P.S. I got pregnant again 3years later and was still scared to tell my mom so I waited till my 18th bday and she was VERY supportive of me and loves my KIDS ta death!
2007-03-23 08:02:23 · answer #8 · answered by nuttybuddy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your really young and im sorry to hear what your going though, but honestly you shouldn't be asking us people on here what you sould do. The only person who can choose is you! You are the mother of these two unborn children. Do you want children at this age? Are you to young? Will you love and be there for them forever? Feed them? These are all the questions you need to ask.
Personally i think you sould keep your baby's, it is not there fault, why sould they suffer! Your mom has chucked you out, well i understand where shes coming from but at least your anuty will let you move in with her, its better than nothing. Your children would grow up knowing what a strong person you are, and how when life was hard you picked yourself up and moved on. Because of them.
Hope i helped, and that you make the right desion for you xâ¥
2007-03-23 04:23:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh Honey--I really feel for you. I believe that you are the one who needs to make this decision yourself. Abortion is a viable option, but you are so young, you may need consent. It also can be very emotionally upsetting, and you should seek counseling first, and after.
Keeping them is a noble choice, but at 15 and alone you are in for a real shock. One baby can suck the life out of you, and I can't even fathom two at once! And you as a woman will cease to exist once you become a mom. It's all about the babies, then! No more fun social life. And how will you support them? And finish school?
Putting them up for adoption may be your wisest choice. Adoptions are open, so you can select the parents, and even be involved in your children's lives! You'll then be able to continue your education, live your fun, young life, and PROTECT YOURSELF UNTIL YOU'RE READY TO BE A MOM!
Your friend sounds like she wants to help--I'd ask her to take me to an adoption center to discuss my options, and in the meantime, try to reconnect with your mother--you'll need her now more than ever--whatever decision you make!
2007-03-23 02:02:15 · answer #10 · answered by mare 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want to give the baby up for adoption contact my wife and I as we want a baby and would be happy to adopt. But for heavens sake don't abort that baby, they didn't do anything wrong but were the result of a relationship that didn't work. I would say Annie sounds like a peach for helping you and you should thank God for her. Your mom is just hurt and not sure how to handle it. She will come around and she must love you because a mothers love is never lost. I pray that God will guide you and that you will find happiness and answers in his love. God loves you very much.
2007-03-23 04:02:09 · answer #11 · answered by Georgia Preacher 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋