Can you pls help me to come out of this ?

Question

Hi , I am 24 yrs old female and have no one other that my mom i this world. I feel very upset these days for no reason. I cannot even dream or think postive about myself and i do not think anything can make me happy.I feel myself to be very lonely. I have a job as an HR Executive in a pvt software company but i do not see any stability in my carrer. I am not able to trust myself or anyone these days.
It is very hard to see my mom struggle to get me married as i am not good looking and it is impossible to get me married. I feel miserable about my life. I cannot discuss this with anyone whom i know because i know they will make fun of me. I am sometimes very scared to think that how i will be when i have to lead my life all alone without anyone with me. I want u to pls let me know the ways how i can come out of this fear of living alone and give some confidence before i loose it completely. Pls fo not make fun of my question .

Answer 1

You describe many classic signs of depression. Have you considered seeking counseling? It may be beneficial to you to have a willing ear to vent your feelings to, and if necessary can prescribe treatments that may help. Those don't necessarily involve a pill, but sometimes those help, too.

You are 24 with an entire life ahead of you. Your job may seem interminable, but you have options that you are plenty young to explore. You could go back to school part time and pursue something that you might enjoy better. You could look for another job that has better advancement opportunities. Some companies actually help pay for schooling. See if yours does and the additional education may open up advancements that were otherwise unavailable to you. If the environment is a source of stress it may need to be changed. That's often not easy but the end result might be far more positive for you than the current situation.

You're also too young to be stressing so much over not being married. There's so much time left for you to meet the right guy and get married and have a family. Just because you haven't found him yet does not make you unattractive. I struggle with self esteem issues every day when I look in the mirror, try on clothes, etc. But I know there are people out there who would be more than happy to be my significant other- I just haven't found him yet.

Everyone has good points, but when you're feeling down it's very hard to see your own. I give you this task, take it if you will, at least once every day find something you did well or something you're good at. When you look in the mirror find one thing about yourself you think is nice. Do you have pretty eyes? How about your hair or smile? Listen to your thoughts. Challenge negative thoughts about yourself. They aren't beneficial to you in anyway and they're generally untrue.

Not to be too personal but how is your relationship with your mother? Is it something you can build on to help you get through this difficult time? Finding these valuable supports and strengthening them is crucial.

It's hard to be much help in a forum like this but I hope I've given you some beneficial advice. I've been through some pretty bad times with depression, low self esteem, etc. I understand what it's like to feel that way and I am more than happy to be a sympathetic ear if you need one.

Answer 2

I think you need more self confidence. I am sorry you only have your mother in this world. You need to build your self esteem and make friends and you won't feel alone. And maybe even a boyfriend. What are your interests?? Join a book club, or volunteer somewhere, to make friends and discuss other things about life. I dont know what your religion is, but maybe you can join a group there as well. Dont feel this way. I have lots of family and some close friends, and there are days when I feel so alone. Its not just you. If you dont feel confident in the way you look, get a makeover to build your self esteem .Get a new haircut, new makeup, new clothes. Just focus on yourself right now and dont worry about being alone forever, because it may not turn out that way:)

Answer 3

that is a very good question and i empathize with you. First, you have to look at everything you have been blessed with and thank God for all....start by being grateful to have a loving mother, and good position in life. Second, pray and ask Heavenly Father to come in your life, change your feelings, etc. He'll help you as he is the only one who can as he has those supernatural powers, and loves you dearly. You do not need to suffer. I used to, felt much like you so I understand what you saying. I changed my life when I made it christ center, and it wasn't an overnight process. Seek a good church, pray daily, even several times, he is always available....then sooner than you'll know, you'll be happy. There are a lot of lonely people out there who just haven't found their way, so don't feel bad. Watch Joyce Meyer "Enjoy Everyday Living" as she can explain things simply, and wonderfully. Best wishes!

Answer 4

Hi,

I know of the problems you're speaking of. I suffer them too, though thank God much less. I'll avoid putting a name or diagnosis to your problem, but you do need to address it with friends and healthcare workers who know what you feel. The two posters before me have given you the right answers. The first one mentioned you must seek help from a center and people, the other mentioned the need to keep faith and positive. It also shows that you are not alone and people care. And you must reach out to people and not worry what they think or laugh at, because at the end you'll just shut yourself out and that is the vicious cycle you must get out from. So please head towards the closest center to seek help with the problem...don't be afraid to ask for help and take a friend or your mom with you if you need to and go in with a positive attitude that after effort you'll come out happier and better. Take care and best of luck! I usually don't give my address out, but this is my e-mail: [e-mail] (NO, I don't worship the devil!!!) if you need anymore help.

Answer 5

Why dont you call the mental health center near you and join a group. They have all kinds of people that get together for just the reasons you discribed above. Go there and talk to people and make some friends!

Answer 6

I agree with carpente...Join some "self-help"groups becuase then no one will make fun of you becuase you guys are in the same position toward one goal-happiness. Also, take some meditative,and relaxing classes, or even some positive thinking classes as well.