I have been with my man for 5 years.. well, he hadn't mentioned marriage a lot, due to our situations.. well recently he's been bringing it up a lot, sounding excited. However... he has been hiding text messages from me. He won't let me see any of them. He says they are from his best friend.. who is helping him out with something, having to do with me, and it being a surprise. He says I will really like it and if he told me, or let me see the messages.. it would ruin it. He even called his best friend and they talked about it in front of me, saying they are texting each other about the surprise. How do I know they aren't both in on it, and its another woman?
I asked him if it was another girl, and he said "why would I text other girls right in front of you?" things like that.
He has never cheated, and I trust him.. but this sounds weird. Is it another girl, or is it about getting engaged?
2007-03-22 19:16:01 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think he is either cheating on you, or he is going to ask you for your hand, can't tell.
2007-03-22 19:20:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you say you trust him,......then either mean it and don't think the worse, or admit to yourself that you don't trust him. Don't lie to yourself and say you trust him when your Post indicates otherwise.
Give him the benefit of any doubts. If he is planning a surpise and wants to marry you, and you go off into some direction of doubts and skepticism, then you will ruin it all.
Don't serve 2 Masters. If you love and trust him, then do so. If you don't trust him and think there is another woman, then stay THAT course. Don't try to stand and balance on the fence line. If you do, you are going to fall and you need to committ to one idea or the other.
5 years of earned trust and honesty should prevail here. Sit back and quit letting this eat at you. He shouldn't be teasing you with any details, but, then again; maybe he wants to see if you are up to the marital challenge.
Go along unless you have a reason to doubt him. And, I wouldn't suggest you playing Super Snoop to try to catch him in something. You'll drive yourself crazy, and you'll feel like a goofball if he proposes to you in a Original way that took a lot of doing with a big rock Diamond.
Just sit back and observe. If a surprise doesn't materilize, then break out your Sherlock Holmes kit. Until then, play the trustworthy G/F.
2007-03-22 19:33:33 · answer #2 · answered by The Sylvan Wizard 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is definitely being very open about this "surprise" and that isn't at all typical of somebody having a secret affair. Unless he's been cruel and insane to you over the last 5 years, I see no reason to worry that he's planning a BAD surprise for you with his friend. But I would tell him that you don't like surprises very much and that this one is only making you upset and nervous, if that's how you feel even after deciding it's not an affair going on.
2007-03-22 19:21:13 · answer #3 · answered by charmedchiclet 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow.. you need to chill out... are you going to marry him if you don't trust him at all? He says that it's a surprise, don't ruin it for yourself. And if you don't see a surprise in the next few months, then you can start wondering about cheating... if you get this upset over something that he tells you will be a surprise for you, you're going to have a lot of heartache being paranoid over him cheating...
2007-03-22 19:21:12 · answer #4 · answered by F.J. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you love and trust him, it's probably about being engaged, or having a nice holiday, or something else, and he is right, why would he be sending text messages to another girl in front of you? that would be asking for trouble. wait a while and see what comes up. stress and little less and wait for a nice surprise.
2007-03-22 19:50:13 · answer #5 · answered by Sarah F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he is trying to get you to be excited and try and figure it out. Honey, I believe he is going to propose to you. I am a very jealous person so of course my mind always goes to the worst but i see nothing bad here.. I hope it's that and not the other nasty surprise..
2007-03-22 19:22:37 · answer #6 · answered by missnmyhuny 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Looks like he may be planning to spring a surprise wedding for you both! Hope you're ready for this!!!!
2007-03-22 19:21:02 · answer #7 · answered by galpal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would be suspicious because that when most people do it "right in front of" spouse because it gives a thrill to be larsinistic, in front of partner!
2007-03-22 19:27:00 · answer #8 · answered by Free-Lance 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless he has done something else to make you wonder - I think this might be a breat surprise
Keep us up to date
2007-03-23 02:19:08 · answer #9 · answered by Confussedhere 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
" I trust him.. " No you don't. If you did you wouldn't have posted.
2007-03-22 19:37:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋