I know this person who is married, but she met someone else and she thinks she is in love with him. She's got 3 children with her husband and and a few issues in her marriage, but things I think can be worked out. If she tells him how she feels and she wants to see this other man and see how it goes, does this sound like a realistic thing for her to ask? I mean can a married couple "take a break" and then work it out later? She thinks being honest with him about how she feels might make him give her the space she needs to see what she wants. Being her friend I want her to be happy, but I don't want to see her throw away her marriage for something that might not be work it.
2007-03-22 19:06:10 · 11 answers · asked by Cyndia 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If she is willing to separate from her husband and spend time getting to know this other man, then in her heart she has probably already strayed from the marriage. In other words, she has probably fell out of love with him, but has "settled" with what she had...now she is seeing that their is light at the end of the tunnel, and wanting to spread her wings. I was in a relationship for a year, it wasn't going anywhere, I met a guy and had a wonderful night with him, not in the sense you think, we talked for hours, about my relationship, and he too pointed out to me that I had settled into something because it was comfortable. Not because I was still in love. I moved on with my life shortly after that, moving out of his house, and back into mine, and later met the love of my life. Sometimes the heart (not the best friend) knows best, and the best friend needs to just be there for moral support.
2007-03-22 21:16:00 · answer #1 · answered by JennieD 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if she is really wanting to be with another guy, the marriage should be over. She really does not care about her husband, and is only thinking of herself. Everyone would be better off if the marriage ends, as there will be no way to save any marriage when she does not wish to be in it any longer.
Appearently, the issues in the marriage are severe enough for her to want or need out. There might not even be a fault, but if it has progressed to this level, it is already too late--it's only sentamentality that prevents the impending divorce.
2007-03-22 19:39:30 · answer #2 · answered by fromorto12 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to say this but she is going to commit Adultery in God's Eyes, legal separation or not. She can separate with the intention of getting back together, but their must be no hanky panky with anyone else. If she just takes a break, Her husband can win in court, custody of their children, or even money, or property if she is the only one fooling around. Help your friend see that marriage is not just something you can put aside like a dirty shirt until washed. Marriage is serious. Can't they try getting help from a marriage counselor? You want your friend to be happy, but I don't think this will bring that for her.
2007-03-22 19:30:44 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have never known "taking a break" to be an effective relationship tool. If she's thinking about leaving she will have put a permanent scar on her marriage so even if her husband takes her back things will never be the same.
2007-03-22 19:11:01 · answer #4 · answered by kirby_669 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It would be OVER in a heart beat!!!
Tell your friend to grow up and think of her children first!
they have to come first and a BREAK will destroy their foundation of security in mother!
This woman want to get her JUICE SQUEEZED by anther man and then come band after awail and wants her family too.
I would tell her husband for no other reason then he needs to get the custody's of kids ,because her reality has taken a break with her sanity!
2007-03-22 19:16:55 · answer #5 · answered by Free-Lance 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I imagine they can but in her case she wants her cake and still eat it too.....whats going to happen is she is going to take her separation, have a honeymoon of a time with the new guy and leave her husband, then he is going to move on to another married women for another good time...classic situation...he has her hooked and he is reeling her in.
2007-03-22 19:12:13 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your friend is trying to clean her dirty conscious, she cant justify herself by separating and then becoming the
neighborhood skank......she already committed the dirty deed, so she just has to deal with her own POOP. What does she think that she'll only be a tramp temporarily cuz she only wants to be separated temporarily?Wish-full thinking....
2007-03-22 19:56:03 · answer #7 · answered by Skinz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Typically no they don't. Because one is messing around the others not. Then if they decide to get back together it's always brought up. It just don't work.
2007-03-22 20:51:21 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Putting a big problem on top of the small problems will not help.
I have problems, but if my spouse brought another into these problems, it would be over for good....
2007-03-22 20:18:37 · answer #9 · answered by j_mang 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trial separation make transaction easier
2007-03-22 19:13:48 · answer #10 · answered by Aunty Pear 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋