My mom's boss is a lesbian and my mom constantly comments on how wrong this is and how its against God, and so immoral, etc. How can tell her I find it extremely offensive without telling her that I take it like a personal attack as well?
2007-03-22 16:55:54 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Well, first of all, you should explain to your Mother from a Christian standpoint that it is not her place to judge. In being a good Christian, she should embrace the teachings of God in that we are not placed here to judge others, but to lift them up and pray for them that will receive the guidance they need.
She doesn't have to agree with anyone's lifestyle, but she has no right to codemn or demoralize someone else's choices.
From your standpoint, you can work in the fact that you have "friends" that are of a gay/lesbian/bi orientation and they are completely wonderful people. You don't judge them based on their sexual orientation or lifestyle choices, but on their individual merits alone.
I'm gay myself and it cuts me to the bone when I hear a family member say something out of the way about a gay/lesbian/bisexual lifestyle and how immoral and degrading it is. Then I politely remind them of the values they brought me up with... let he who is without "sin" cast the first stone. That shuts them up pretty kick. I drive it on home with the fact that in a truly Christian effort, if they disagree so whole-heartedly then it should be impressed upon their heart to pray for that individual and that they will get the guidance that God would have for them!
2007-03-22 17:21:06 · answer #1 · answered by Brandon M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well the first thing you have to consider is that people who have prejudices based on ignorance that have probably been seared into their minds their whole lives, most likely will not change. I think that you would have the right to explain to your mom that you think it is disgusting the way she talks about other human beings who have done nothing wrong. This is the proper reaction, disgust, when someone says something that insensitive and bigoted, regardless of your orientation. I think that it is wise that you are trying to tell her that these kind of disparaging comments are wrong without telling her about how you might be bi as this may lead not only to unintentional hurt feelings but outright malicious attacks on you and your personality. It might be best to tell her that you think it is wrong to talk about people like that and that you are extremely offended by her dehumanizing comments. But again people with prejudices most often do not change and it might be in your best interest to seek some sort of outside support to prevent the possibility that your mother's comments cause some serious harm to your self-esteem and mental well-being.
2007-03-22 17:08:53 · answer #2 · answered by Cocked F 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By saying you're offended is kind of saying you're taking it personal. You can't really say one without saying the other.
You should really give her a reality check. I mean...it's 2007!
But she really needs to grow up. She isn't in high school anymore! She can stop gossiping and hating other people for something beyond her control.
But...you can lie? Say a random friend just came out to you and give her your opinion on the matter that way. You can make it clear that what she is saying is wrong without feeling like its getting personal.
2007-03-22 17:05:09 · answer #3 · answered by Jimmy B 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that you can't stand being around her when she's being so hateful. You don't even have to bring up the sexuality part of the situation, just how hateful and angry she's being. It's honestly a waste of time.
2007-03-23 03:52:25 · answer #4 · answered by carora13 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you can explain how "someone" very close to you is gay/bi. Then say how it hurts you when she makes those comments because of your friend.
2007-03-22 17:02:24 · answer #5 · answered by Louie 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
One thing that worked for me is to say: "That is hate speech, I do not tolerate hate speech of any kind around me, do not say those things around me again."
That way you are banning hateful speech not just homophobic remarks.
2007-03-22 17:06:30 · answer #6 · answered by Lucas 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
tell her she sounds like an ignorant redneck hick when she talks like this. She either suspect you are messing with girls, or she is......yes, an ignorant rednecked hick. Good luck
2007-03-22 17:06:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
my mom does the same thing i just keep quiet
2007-03-22 17:02:20 · answer #8 · answered by kimgurl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
unfortunately my dear, u can't.
2007-03-22 17:02:16 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋