My mom gets mad at me for EVERYTHING but my sister does the same stuff and doesnt get in trouble. I feel like she hates me and I hate her back but I dont want to hate her, I want to like her, but I just cant. I'm going on a class camping trip and want to leave on good terms, but she is making it soooo hard. today I asked her for something simple (to stop at starbucks) and she said all I do is ask her for stuff and blah blah blah. I am 13 and at my final year at my school. were finally starting to do fun stuff and my mom says I'm grounded over a dumb fight we had and that means over break! she is seriously recking my life. I have hated my school but now people are starting to like me and she is recking it. and on top of that I have to watch my sister get away with murder! I really need some advice!!!
2007-03-22 16:55:53 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Actually my sister (the one being favored ) is 16, and I have to older siblings after her that are 21 and 24.
2007-03-23 16:07:19 · update #1
I read that my mom is concerned about how guys look at me, and that is not true. there are these 4 nasty guys at me school who treat me really nasty and stuff and whenver I tell her she thinks I'm exaggurating (I'M NOT) some guys are nice but its not like they are attracted to me. Tonight she got all mad that I was "being to stressful" when looking for my blank Cd's which I wasn't, and she went off onto another one of her rants and told me that she is a raw nerve because of me stressing her out the night previous (not true), and then proceeded to tell my sister goodnight in a nice, happy tone.. whenever I try to talk to her it is kinda in the heat of the moment, but I think she thinks I'm trying to raise myself a pity party WHICH ISNT TRUE!!! I'm just so sad about all of this!
2007-03-23 16:16:06 · update #2
the one thing i have learned is that bs about parents loving all their kids equally is a load of cock. good parents try not to show it too much... sadly in your case IT SHOWS- if in fact she is as bad as you say. you cannot really do much. you need her since you are just only 13 so you are pretty much F*ed in the A for the next five or so years. good luck (sorry it isn't much progressive help, but it is realistic).
2007-03-22 18:45:12 · answer #1 · answered by melloncollieromance 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
13! I remember that. Hated it! Hated my mom, but espeically hated my little brother. My mom(I thought) loved him best, and he got everything he wanted. Well, I'm 33 now. My mom does love my brother best. But she is my best friend now.
One thing you have to realize, hormones are terrible things that cause women(of which you are now becoming) to go insane. Your mom has had these hormones for alot longer than you, therefore she is even more nuts than you are!! Your sister is younger, doesn't have the hormones, yet, so she doesn't send your mom into a tizzy nearly as quickly! You may think I am making it all up, but I'm not. So, what can you do? Stay out of your moms way as much as you can when either of you are in a bad mood. Try to talk to her when both of you are calm and have some time. Don't jump in with accusations of being treated unfair. Tell her about your day, talk about your friends, ask about her day, then ask why the rules are tougher on you. Ask her to explain why you didn't get something you wanted. Listen to her answers. It maybe that she feels that you are older and should have more responsiblity. Or maybe you whine a bit and it annoys her. Or, most likely, she had a bad day and didn't mean to sound so harsh, but her nerves were shot, and she is only human.
You are entering into a very good, but very bad age. You are almost grown up. Mom is starting to expect things from you that you might not realize. She is expecting more help, more understanding of her feelings, and for you to act more and more like an adult. It is also, quite frankly, scaring the poop out of her. She is seeing all the stupid things she did when she was 13, and hoping and praying that you are smarter than she was. She sees how the boys look at you, and not liking it. She also sees how much alike you two are, and that is hard, too, because she wants you to do better than she did. You two may not get along real well again until you are 20, but one day you will understand her, and things will get better! The big thing is, start treating her like a person, and I bet she will start treating you different, too!
2007-03-22 17:28:28 · answer #2 · answered by jenn_a 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as a twin, i can understand. i too was your age, and it does feel like they are treating you like the 'ugly duckling'.
the only advice i can say is that you are stronger than your sister, and your mom gives you more responsiblility and requires more from you(maturity).
she doesn't hate you, she just doesn't realize how she is making you feel. i am sure if you try to tell her, she will get all offended and tell you your crazy, been there. but think of it this way, if your spring break is soon approching, try to ignore all the little things, help more around the house, and explain to her that i would be beneficial to you to be able to go and do things with your friends.
i wish you all the luck inthe world, and i tell you that you are not alone, cause even now, i am almost 26, and i still get the 'oh your sister needs this...' speach, but when iam alone and depressed (with a husband deployed into war) no one wants to make a 4 hr trip to see me. So, sorry, I hope you can talk to her and help her realize that she treats you like sh it .
(((((hugs)))))
2007-03-22 17:04:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to speak with your mom about this. and like an adult. calmly, civily, with a head on your shoulders. without criticism, pointing fingers, yelling all sorts of stuff. and when one of you does get out of line, there should be a timeout. and definately your sister needs not be in the room. your mom will never know how you feel unless you tell her.
my 4.5 year old son told me i treated him differently than i do his 2 year old sister and it broke my heart. so i did something about it.
2007-03-22 17:02:27 · answer #4 · answered by pwrgrlmanda 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell your mom how you feel. Tell her that it feels like she hates you, I was the same way with my mom when i was your age. After a few years (and me movin out of the house) we became best friends. Like i said, just talk 2 her abt how u feel.
2007-03-22 17:03:30 · answer #5 · answered by tommi_ghurl_2006 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i had the same problem (except it was my bro and sis that got everythin). anyway, just sit down with her and tell her how you feel, dont raise ur vioce or get angry and then she will see what a mature person ur turning out to be and will listen to ur opinion. i hope that u work things out with ur mum, good luck!!
2007-03-23 07:00:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just stop asking her for stuff. You are 13, why do you need to stop at Starbucks?
2007-03-22 17:00:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
why don't you settle this like an adult would...with a gun...uh... normal calm conversation with your mother
2007-03-22 18:10:03 · answer #8 · answered by speedy >>> 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋