My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 years... since we were 15. We are living together and planning on moving to Florida together here within the next year. I have been thinking a lot about us and the future. Everytime I bring up marriage... he just doesn't really say much! Why?!?!
2007-03-22 14:34:00 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
b/c ur both only 21. you're way too young to get married. i know u've been together for 6yrs, but sorry to say this - a relationship during teen years doesn't count for much. our personalities change so much from teen years into our twenties that who you are at 15, 17, 19, or 21 is totally different. if you said 6yrs from age 18 or 19, i'd understand. but in essense you're both babies. you haven't had a chance to grow up as individuals. i really think he'd be doing you a disservice if he agreed to marriage now. there's a whole world of other people out there that you have yet to meet. when people start dating so young, it's hard for them to grow up relationship-wise. as far as your relationship goes with him, it may be immature in many ways b/c that's just how things have always been with you too. my advice, get some experience under your belt. you're really selling yourself short by considering marrying him. sounds like he's not ready for marriage anyway. maybe knowing that you are dating other guys will make him more sure that you are the one for him. b/c right now neither of you have any way of knowing b/c you've never been with anyone else in any way.
2007-03-22 14:41:53 · answer #1 · answered by RedDevyl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men and women have different commitment thresholds. Women tend to be earlier than men. Men aren't usually mentally settled into the idea of marriage until after they feel they have lived their life and done enough to be happy with theirselves. If you guys have been conjoined twins since 15, and he's shying away from marriage, it's a normal thing. Usually between the ages of 26-32 is when males generally consider themselves as decided in their goals, careers, and what they plan on doing with their lives. If you two love each other, stay in the relationship if you're happy. Ultimatums will drive him away, statistically speaking that's a bad thing to do. You've already mentioned it to him, it's his turn to mention it to you, it just takes time. Only alternative advice I have is that if you two last into the above mentioned age range and you see no interest in marriage from him, then more than likely there will not be. Then it would be time, if you're committed to "only marriage will do for me", to dissolve things between the two of you. Some guys don't like marriage, but will be by your side til the day you die. Can't quiet explain that, but it happens. He may be one of those guys. Your'e both young still, give it a little more time.
2007-03-22 14:54:38 · answer #2 · answered by anubisy2k2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been with my sweetheart for 12 years and we have 3 kids together! I too was frustrated that our relationship hadn't progressed to the next step. My sweetheart made the same type of excuses I'm sure you're experiencing now. I finally gave him an ultimatum, and we've been married since December 22, 2006. It might hurt at first to think of your life without him if he opts out of marrying you, but if he refuses too marry you still, then truthfully you know he doesn't love you.
2007-03-22 14:50:39 · answer #3 · answered by immikko 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He may think your both to young or he is not ready to commit to marriage. Rethink about going to Florida and getting a home with him. Living in a house with him is kind of like marriage. If he is ready to move in with you, why isn't he ready to marry you? I just don't think it is not the best thing to move in with him at the time, of course that is my opinion.
2007-03-22 14:49:20 · answer #4 · answered by wish 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guys are weird. They are completely happy screwing us women for years and years and years.......as long as they don't have to spend money on a ring.
Actually, I think it's just a case of maybe your boyfriend is not ready to settle down just yet. At 21 he may feel he is too young to get married. Just because you are there and ready to committ, he may be miles behind you. After all, girls do mature faster than boys.
So, just hang in there. Who knows, maybe he will surprise you.
2007-03-22 16:05:30 · answer #5 · answered by jerkygirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your asking "why does he want to marry me after 6 years?" your story sounds like he is using you for a cructh and doesnt want to marry you...so what are you saying here...Im very confused....your communication skills are lacking..."grins" no offense..but you answered your own question...GET RID of him....6 years...and no marriage in site and he wants to move you off to FLORIDA....have you lost your wits....Heck no to Florida and kick him to the curb....he is just wanting you due to you are his comfort zone.....good luck
2007-03-22 14:43:29 · answer #6 · answered by Keli 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
shop your panties on. combat the urges, does not sound such as you have tried that not straightforward in case you have had 8 one night stands already. stay away from the failings that deliver forth those urges. handle the subject concerns on your intercourse existence with your husband that flow away you unhappy with it. refer to him, connect with him instead of retaining a chew of your self away continuously. Counselling. There are doezens of issues you should be doing to stay away from this, yet you have not fairly tried. till your keen to allow flow of the selfish prefer to cheat, you will proceed to realize this. there is no miracle therapy, no pilll you could take, not something yet not straightforward artwork and a deep not straightforward verify out your self, your movements and the implications they have quite your husband properly-knownshows out or not. damaging damaging guy.
2016-10-19 09:28:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he wants to move to Florida and get some action with some hot babes. marriage is the farthest from his mind. you can't be that naive. you want to lock him in before you go to florida to see that he doesn't ditch you once in florida.
2007-03-22 14:40:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Six years ago, I was in your shoes. I have been with my boyfriend for 12 yrs and i still dont have a ring so beware! Read my question!
2007-03-22 14:37:49 · answer #9 · answered by msnothinbutalady 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
after 6 years DEMAND what you want. if you want to get married and after 6 years i believe you should, and he refuses time to go....
better to leave after 6 years than 12.
2007-03-22 14:38:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋