I feel like I want beable to be on my own with a child. It's scary to think of how I would do it. Plus everything I have is in his name. I knew I shouldn't have married him, and I know he feels the same he just want admit it.
2007-03-22 14:30:56 · 28 answers · asked by J14k 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
doesnt sound too good....well if you guys knew you should not have gotten married, my question is why did you and why did you guys have a child?
2007-03-22 14:33:19 · answer #1 · answered by Keli 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know what the circumstances of your situation are, but before you do it, be sure it is the best thing for you. Ultimately no matter what choice you make, if you're not happy, you child won't be either. If this is something that can be worked out with better communcation, maybe some counciling, and a few adjustments from both of you then do everything in your power to fix it before you file for divorce. If it comes to that, you will be alright. Make sure you file for child support and use that money to help with childcare while you learn t get on your feet alone. I never divorced my husband, but I did come very, very close. I was raising my 1 year old daughter alone for three months. It's not easy. It's scary, and hard to juggle, so be sure that it's what you really want before you make it final, but it can be done. You just need to be sure your make the right choice for yourself so you can be a good support for your child. So sorry to hear you're in this situation, I hope it all works out okay for you.
2007-03-22 21:38:44 · answer #2 · answered by Irish 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
people get divorced all the time who don't think they can make it. If you two really don't want to be together you shouldn't especially for the child's sake. The child will witness you two fighting all the time. With everything in his name that doesn't really matter it's up to the courts what goes where. As far as a divorce though is concerned it's very expensive so be prepared for that. I asked a girl the other day how much her divorce cost and she said her lawyer alone was 12 grand.
2007-03-22 21:34:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
go see a divorce lawyer without him knowing and make sure the lawyers office does not call your home. find out all the info you need and then decide. Of course you have to do the drill, does he love me, do i love him, do we make each other happy, can i do it on my own, where will I live all the tough questions and the lawyer will tell you the other parts and you can decide and go from there. When its time for the talk with hubby, tell him you just don't feel the same about him anymore and you think he feels the same way and lets move on. Take care Heather
2007-03-22 21:38:25 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you need to talk to your husband and consider seperating for a bit to work out what you both want for your lives.
Counselling will help you see things from a different perspective, and can help you claify your feelings and decisions. There's a great website in Australia that has lots of online information: http://www.relationships.com.au/
I hope you can make a decision and find some happiness.
Don't forget to consider how this will affect your child's life - and make sure your husband has access to the child. Men miss their kids alot when relationships end. (Imagine how you would feel if he got custody and control?)
2007-03-22 21:39:46 · answer #5 · answered by Puss in Boots 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before you turn you child's life upside down and take him or her away from the father, go see a pastor or a marriage counselor. You loved him enough to marry him and make a baby, so you have a duty to try and work things out with him for the sake of your child
2007-03-22 22:19:07 · answer #6 · answered by Carl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well get up get a job if you dont have one and slowly but shortly get your own, because you dont want him say that he wants nothing to do with you and your not prepared think of it while hes doing what he does you do you also so either you can say its over or he can the child will understand after a while,, or just try to work threw it but dont use the child as an excuse to stay with him cause your the one whos gonna end up the most hurt in the end.
2007-03-22 21:40:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
do the right thing and move on. it will be hard at first but you will gain so much self-esteem from knowing that you did it on your own. there are women out there on their own with little or no $ and with multiple children. if they can do it, so can you. there are many programs made just for single mothers with small children. you & your child will not starve or be homeless. there is a way you can make it. all you need to do is ask for help, and you will get it.
2007-03-22 21:33:45 · answer #8 · answered by RedDevyl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get some county assistance and go to the district attorneys office to file for child support. The rest will fall into place. There is low cost housing, food stamps, health coverage, etc. If his is the Father he will have to be accountable to the child ... take care of yourself and your child. If he is abusive call your local church ... they generally offer shelters and job training.
2007-03-22 21:34:37 · answer #9 · answered by daffodil 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you stay in a unhealthy relationship just for the child that could teach the child negative behaviour. If its not a good relationship you should split but if you can work it out and you want to work it out, give it a chance.
2007-03-22 21:34:20 · answer #10 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They always say you need to ask yourself "Would I be better off with him or without him." Only you can decide. You must have thought you loved him at one time, and he must have felt the same way also. My advice would be to go to a marriage counselor. I think you owe it to yourself, him, and your child. I'ts very difficult and sad to have to stay with someone just because you can't make it on your own. Good luck.
2007-03-22 21:44:09 · answer #11 · answered by conni 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋