I recently went to Hawaii with one of my girlfriends. I just got back 2 days ago. I had a fantastic time. We went hiking, and swimming, and exploring. We painted silks and beaded crystal suncatchers. We attended a 2 year old's birthday party. It was good clean fun. My husband was outraged that I went without him. He was hurt by the fact that I wanted to have time for me when I didn't want to be someone's wife or mother. I simply needed a break. I arranged for my mother, who we both trust, to watch our daughter while he was working. Do you think it's normal for couple's to take some vacations away from each other? I feel like it's healthy...and was much needed and very helpful. I was gone for 10 days, and now I feel refreshed. I'm even sending him out next week! How do you feel about spouses taking time apart?
2007-03-22 14:27:49 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I didn't vacation with "family money"...My grandfather bought my airline ticket. We stayed in a tent the whole time. I rode around in the back of a pickup truck, and cooked my own meals. I spent less than $300 of my own money ( I do work full time, and actually make more than my husband) on a 10 day trip to Hawaii.
2007-03-22 16:21:20 · update #1
I'm purchasing a ticket for my husband to go to Jamaica with the same friend...why is that wrong?
2007-03-22 16:24:11 · update #2
I think it is awesome that you did that. Men do not seem to realize we need time away with the girls too. Or just time to be ourselves, not just someones wife or someones mom, but the person whom we are. Men get alot more time away from the kids, and the wife normally and they should allow the same. It sounds like you had wonderful clean fun and you should do it at least once evry year or two just to keep remembering whom it is that you are.
2007-03-22 14:32:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh man! I have often suggested to my wife that we take separate vacations. Bottom line is that she's not into the same recreational activities that I am. I like to go and do and see and tour and etc. My wife on the other hand is content with a book and a lounge chair by the pool. For instance, last spring I went hiking in the Grand Canyon. Very tough. Very physical. I loved it. My wife would have hated it.
This spring we went to Mexico. Sat by the beach, swam in the ocean, did some shopping, took some tours. Not high adventure, but we were together and we both enjoyed it.
There's noting wrong with spending vacation time apart. Not that you should do it all the time. I think you need to spend some relaxing time together. But sometimes you each need to do your own thing. "Absence makes the heart grow fonder."
2007-03-22 14:38:49 · answer #2 · answered by Buckwheat 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your husband has a lot of security issues with the marriage. There is no reason in the world why you shouldn't be able to go on a vacation separate from your husband. Sounds like you had a wonderful time, having good clean fun. Best wishes to you.
2007-03-23 06:44:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with you, spending time apart is healthy in a relationship. Commonly when a couple spends too much time together they tend to argue, fight, or break up. Healthy time apart can clear your mind, help you to start missing the other person (instead of them getting on your nerves), and it also helps couples to not depend on the other person so much. So, no I do not think it's wrong. Take care!
2007-03-22 14:35:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think getting "refreshed" as you put it is a great thing, but I would prefer to do that with my husband. We all get drowned with the responsibilities of life, and need to get away, but doing that as a couple keeps you a couple. I find taking two vacations a year is great. One with the kids as a family, and with just the two of us, to "refresh" as you put it. Hawaii is filled with romance!! Wouldn't it have been wonderful to have him there to share that with you? I'm not saying that time with your friends is wrong, but thats what long lunches are for, not romantic getaways.
2007-03-22 16:01:33 · answer #5 · answered by anncinn 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think its great that you got away for some time for you. You did nothing wrong. I think it keeps a relationship healthy to spend time apart.
About once a month my girlfriend and I go out for supper, a drink or two, shopping, a movie or just sit back and relax and catch up on some gossip. It helps me to unwind and come back refreshed for my husband and kids.
Enjoy your "me time".
2007-03-22 15:02:15 · answer #6 · answered by sweetie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Vegas or Disneyland there is no distinction, I in basic terms take trip trips with my important different. era in case you and the ladies prefer to have a draw close out night it fairly is one ingredient. yet to take a trip away out of your important different, what solid might that do on your relationship? i don't see the way it ought to income your marriage in any way. we've been married for 13 years and the longest we've been separate is 3 nights by way of a funeral in Anguilla I had to attend, and my husband ought to not come because of the fact he had to artwork. i will anticipate one hand the finished days we've been aside. those have been the longest nights i will undergo in recommendations. i comprehend a pair who the spouse left for England to spend some time there with family individuals for a volume of time and a few months later the husband replaced into being observed as on for baby help (He had a fling with the subsequent door neighbour on an identical time as she replaced into away on her happy prolonged trip). female do not do it.
2016-10-19 09:28:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't blame your husband for being mad, after all, isn't he supposed to be the most important person in you life and you're spending your vacation with a friend?
2016-01-16 15:41:07 · answer #8 · answered by Ace Shorty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong at all with a seperate vacation. Sometimes you just want to spend time with friends. People who criticize that are just insecure. Nothing wrong with a little "me" time. Just because you are married doesn't mean you have to be joined at the hip.
2007-03-22 15:23:09 · answer #9 · answered by Sunshine Queen 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that its OK to spend time apart. but the problem is they may not trust you. so you have to re insure them of all the love you and him have together. and also let him know that there will be family time and sometimes just you and his time. everybody needs time away as long as he can have time to him self to with out any problems with in good reason
2007-03-22 14:47:50 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋