I just recently found out my husband of 5 months is cheating. I went into his email and found emails between him and a girl. He travels alot for work so there is ample time for him to get away with this. He is going to be very shocked that I know but I can't live my life with a cheating husband especially after only 5 months. What kind of life will we have? He tells me all the time he loves me and I just can't understand what he thinks he is gaining? I guess he thought he could have the cozy life with me and then just dick around as how would I ever find out? If I tell him I searched his email he will obviously be pissed. But to me this is way worse then me going into his private emails. Help. I am so lost.
2007-03-22 13:53:13 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i think you shoud confront your husband about him cheating, you dont have to do any explaining about how you found out. he is the one who is in the wrong.
2007-03-24 07:22:39 · answer #1 · answered by amy w 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh no after only 5 months, I feel for you. I would sit him down for a fireside chat and say to him that you get the feeling he's been cheating and I would then ask him out right. So he has the opportunity to be honest. If he lies then I would confront him with the evidence. You willthen know he's a liar and cheat too and could never be trusted. Even if you did take him back it would always be there at the back of your mind when he goes away on business. Good luck x Email me if you like and let me know how you get on x
2007-03-23 01:28:35 · answer #2 · answered by farleyjackmaster 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You went through his email because you already knew something was going on. Yes it's underhand but you found something out that will save you grief in the long run. He will use the fact that you looked at email as defence but you are right, what he has done is far worse. I would tell everything to him and say I know what I have done is wrong BUT why are you doing this to me? I think everyone deserves a second chance so I would give him the benefit of the doubt, but only once- 2 strikes and you're out.
You could also find so much more happiness from a good man, they are out there, and you are worth so much more than this.
2007-03-22 22:29:01 · answer #3 · answered by christine s 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will probably get comments about going into his e mails da de da de da.
This is widely used by women these days as a safety valve.....and at the end of the day a wife has the right to know and if that is what it takes.....so be it....as there should be no secrets anyway. I would err on the cautious when conforntinghim as to how you know....because in some perverse way the fact you peeped at his e mail gives him some sort of moral leverage in the argument and defensive statements he will make. Say you heard through a friend and fiercely protect thier identity.....his deceit deserves a little deceit in return and after all you are only protecting yourself.
Confront him ......this is so hard for you and my heart goes outto you because to me one of the greatest hurts is that of betrayal. I do understand how lost you feel have been there myself and it is horrible.....but it does pass and you are worthy of so much better.
2007-03-22 21:48:48 · answer #4 · answered by eagledreams 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't be too quick to jump to a conclusion - emails between two persons does not amount to cheating on you, even if what is written in them could be err... rather juicy! The e-mail allows people to flirt, to do things to one another that they won't do when they meet face to face. I once had a friend who use to write to this girl who he had never even gone out with or met. From the correspondence, you would think that they were having an affair or were lovers but the real fact was that there was nothing between them, just two people having what they think is harmless fun writing and teasing one another.
Be calm and check things out properly first to see whether he really is cheating on you! Confronting him without really checking things out properly could do you and your relationship irrepairable damage.
If you still feel lost, find someone you can trust (your pastor or close friend) and talk things out. For me personally, I find that prayers do help!
2007-03-22 22:04:28 · answer #5 · answered by Seng Kim T 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Confront him, find out if it's is an affair and not just e-mail flirting, if it is an affair get rid of him, cheating after only five months does not look good for the future - how will you ever be able to trust him again? If he is pissed off because you looked in his e-mails throw his computer against the wall - he has no business being pissed with you.
2007-03-23 03:53:45 · answer #6 · answered by ffiondove 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How do I confront my cheating husband?
2014-12-18 18:24:55 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
E-mails can be read in a different way if you dont have the full story! as Long as your 100% sure you know that without a shadow of doubt ur hubby is shacking up with this person! Be very careful u have not read too much into something because we as women can be a bit parnoide.. dont loose ur marriage over something u think? because u will be hurting the most... Make sure u have more than just e-mails to go by.
2007-03-26 11:45:53 · answer #8 · answered by Lady Love 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi, sara. I don't have any advice for you, but I wanted to let you know we have something in common. My husband met a woman on the personals (yahoo I think). They had a relationship that lasted several months. They never met in person but regardless, it has harmed our marriage in so many ways. I'm sorry for you. My heart goes out to you. I hope you have some good close friends to lean on.
2007-03-24 02:21:34 · answer #9 · answered by I39 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok you were wrong to read his emails but its better to find out now than later, I respected my wifes privacy but I did wonder about all the phone calls, texts and emails but I never pried I trusted her, more fool me I was the one working away a lot and rushing home to be with her only to find she had arranged nights out with the Girls etc? .It hurt to find out the woman I loved and trusted my best friend etc could betray me over so long a period but these things happen. ditch and move on my Girl, Ditch and move on you are worth more than that, you cannot cheat if you love someone its impossible so he doesn't love you or respect you, Good Luck its a shame when it happens but unfortunately it does. Take Care
2007-03-25 12:00:26 · answer #10 · answered by decrepid1958 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋