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My mom has been on a steady decline. She was repeatedly abused by my alcoholic dad, physically and emotionally. My family and I have been alone now, but after an incident at work my mom quit her job to avoid liabilities. She drinks so much wine, and she’s broken down crying on me three times, which she’s never done before. She swears more, and she won’t get another job even though she has three kids to raise. She verbally attacks me but treats my brothers well. I bumped into her in the kitchen once and she rounded on me, saying, “I’m getting this feeling that you’re trying to bug me,” which I had never even thought of doing. I told her that she should stop attacking me, because I need to vent and tell other people about what she’s doing to me, and she quickly apologized, maybe in an attempt to keep other people from knowing how she acted. She absolutely refuses therapy. I want to help her, but how? And how can I keep her from targeting me like this?

2007-03-22 13:15:53 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Other - Family & Relationships

5 answers

It is not your job to care for your mom, I know it sounds harsh but thats the way it has to be. Can you stay with friends, family, grandma anyone? GET OUT and tell her your not coming home again till she gets it together. Yes she has had a really rough time of it, so did my mom and I watched the beatings. There is absolutley nothing you can do for her unless she wants to change. Get therapy for yourself, take care of you, souonds lie you is all you have right now. If it is to the point where you fear for your brothers safety or your own you neded to call someone, THIS IS TOO BIG FOR YOU ALONE. Get help wherever you can. My prayers are with you.

2007-03-22 13:24:30 · answer #1 · answered by Papa Joe 4 · 0 0

http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/
For over 50 years, Al-Anon (which includes Alateen for younger members) has been offering hope and help to families and friends of alcoholics. It is estimated that each alcoholic affects the lives of at least four other people... alcoholism is truly a family disease.

2007-03-22 20:19:24 · answer #2 · answered by Violet Pearl 7 · 0 0

for one thing wine depresses people, try to be understanding. All she knows is abuse. she doesn't love your brothers more than you, this is a time for you to grow as a person, have good friends in your life, and mabey a trusted adult to confide in. Pray to Jesus.

2007-03-22 20:25:50 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Sorry for you. Even if you can't get your mother to go YOU can go to meetings. Someone already posted a link to al-anon. I HIGHLY recommend you use it. Good luck and prayers for you.

2007-03-22 20:30:46 · answer #4 · answered by Betsy 7 · 0 0

cry - hard and long- emotional blackmail will get her to feel guilty and hopefully agree to attend rehab classes or something

2007-03-22 20:19:17 · answer #5 · answered by Zuri 3 · 0 0

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