Men how to understand them? How should i emotionally process this?

Question

I am getting seperated my husband, he decided that he is moving out in one more week. He wants to stay friends but dosent want to live togeather anymore or have a romantic relationship. He isn't interested in other woman either only wants to be alone and sleep and have peace n quiet all the time. He is on depression meds. What should i think? We have been togeather for almost 8 years. I told him if he leaves we are done for good. He dosent seem to care said he wants to live alone. How should i process this or make sence of this? I know its proubley for the better less heartache in the long run. Any opinions??

Answer 1

Hes on depression medication, he wants to live alone, but he wants to remain friends. He doesnt have another romantic attachment...wow....I dont know how I could process that at all. Sounds to me like his depression is getting the best of him. It's quite unnatural for a person to want to be on their own, unless of course the stress of living with you is just too much....is that the case?

The only thing I would suggest is that his medication is probably the reason he is retreating from life. Medication helps with depression, but medication on its own, usually doesnt help and in a lot of cases can make a person worse.

He needs to get off that medication somehow, or else it needs to be changed. Maybe go and talk to your doctor and see if he/she thinks his behaviour could be caused by the medication. I guess its no good suggesting counselling because he sounds like he is too far gone for that. I would be quite worried actually because it sounds like he just wants to hide himself away from the world....thats not healthy. Go talk to the doctor because I think I would be quite concerned by his behaviour.

Good luck

Answer 2

Your husband sounds as though he has already decided to face his depression problems on his own. There isn't a whole lot you can do if this is his decision. Many people with depression problems cannot have long term commitments. I had a brother in law that was about the same and went through two marriages(and divorces) for the same reason. Sorry for your pain, but you will be better off letting him go his own way.

Answer 3

Divorce is hard, but if this is what he really wants don't stand in his way it will only make things worse. Ask him to go to marriage counseling after he moves out if the relationship is worth anything to you. If he refuses then you know where you stand with him and move on with your life. Things have a way of working themselves out in the longrun. And everything happens for a reason. Good luck and pray about it

Answer 4

You do not need to make any sense of this- however- to really understand I would suggest talking to a professional so that he/she May enlighten what you hubby is saying. Depression is a disease that can and will affect everyone- kinda like a alcoholic. So, he has sought some help- how its your turn- if you cannot get the answers form him then a professional will help you.

Answer 5

Just because he says he isn't interested in other women doesn't mean that is the truth. I wouldn't try to processes it but give him the option of counceling and if that fails you can't make a person love you and it is better to move on.

Answer 6

You might as well file for divorce. You can't make someone love you.

Answer 7

Sounds like mental illness.

I would refer him to access mental health (if he would listen).

Answer 8

He's miserable around you. Doesn't mean it's anything you did...he's just miserable around you. You don't want him to be miserable do you? Say goodbye.

Answer 9

i dont know what to tell you, except that there probably is another woman, or man?