do you like my poem?

Question

before my eyes pictures appear
from long ago but still clear
with skies of blue wind in my hair
we shared the moment without a single care
i still remmember one summer's day
she held my hand to lead the way
and showed me tresures love in her smile
wild flowers were in bloom
wearing a crow of dew
and sunrays on the leaves danced in and out of view
hear the stream thts flowing by swallow flying in the sky
all the beautis of the land
i began to undrestand on tht day she held my hand
while the perfume in the air
takes my senses unawares
giving joy without compare

Answer 1

It's awesome!!! Don't even listen to that dude who said no. I wish i could do that, but i do write books so i'd listen to that girl who made some suggestions in your poem. She seems good at it. It's awesome!!!!! :-)))))

Answer 2

yeah its good, i *ed and () remove things that i think would make it flow a bit better.

before my eyes pictures appear
from long ago but still *are* clear
with skies of blue wind (in) *throughout* my hair
we shared the moment without a single care
i still remmember one summer's day
she held my hand to lead the way
and showed me tresures love in her smile
wild flowers were *all* in bloom
(wearing) *draped in* a crow*n* of dew
and sunrays on the leaves danced in and out of view
hear the stream th*a*ts flowing (by) *with the* swallow flying in the sky
all the (beautis) *beauties* of the land
i began to undrestand on th*a*t day she held my hand
while the perfume *lingered* in the air
(takes) *taking* my senses unaware(s)
giving joy without compare

Answer 3

constructive criticism...
(but I'm no professional, mind you)
it's good for a rough draft!
you might want to work on editing it, revising, maybe
add periods and commas and semi-colons and etc
to show where you want to pause, it gives the reader
more of a realistic chance to see what kind of tone
you want to set for your piece.

you seem more concerned with rhyming with
the next word, or few words.. which reads awkwardly..
and makes it sound more sing-song like.
Perhaps that's my own prejudice, but it doesn't seem
to follow any particular rhyme scheme other than tying
the first few and last few lines together.

personally, to answer your question, it doesn't fit my taste, no.
but its good.. keep up the good work.
i've read worse.
practice, practice, practice. :)

The sources are some websites that may help you.
Good luck and keep writing!

Answer 4

It's beautiful and very descriptive.

Answer 5

I like it. it takes courage to publish something like this for anyone to see. For that I salute you.

Answer 6

its a really good poem

Answer 7

no