Bullies?????

Question

why do people feel the need to bully? are girls worse than boys? can the girls who destroyed my sisters life live with themselves? I'm normally tolerant person but i feeling the need for revenge what should i do? Is it the parents who are fault? somebody answer theses questions as my head is hurting trying to figure them out?

the bullies have done their job and now my sis is in a eating disorder clinic.

Hate is a word i never used but i beginning to think i should

Answer 1

I wish i knew why bullies bully. I was constantly bullied in school and it has left me with emotional scars for life. All of my confidence has gone out of the window. I absolutely hate what i see when i look in the mirror, i feel ugly, because girls would constantly tell me that i was ugly, i left school 4 years ago. I locked myself in my room and cut myself. I am very shy and i haven't even got any friends, just my fiance, who is doing well to help me come out of my shell. No matter how many times he tells me i am beautiful, i'm still not convinced, i still feel ugly. I hardly talk to anyone in person, i only type on internet chat rooms. Yes i would say that girls are much worse at bullying than boys, much more cruel and spineless. It's up to the school to prevent bullying but they just don't care really. My mother was trying as hard as she could to get my school to listen but they did nothing about it, so i just stopped going to school alltogether. It ruined my life. The bastards!

Answer 2

Hi Theo! Firstly can I say that you have struck a nerve with me. Give my best to you sis - tell her from me that she is a better person than them all put together.
I'll give you my opinion on your questions for what they are worth!
1. A bully is so insecure that demeaning people in any way makes them feel better about themselves!
2. Firls may not necessarily be worse than boys but they can be crueller. Boys usually bully by violence - however girls usually bully with the mental aspect. (sometime this is worse because a bruise/cut can heal - mental torment is often worse)
3. The girls who bullied your sis probably have never thought about this in any great detail and that's why they have continued to do this to her. Also most bullies are as previously said insecure and need the attention resulting from this - whether that be good or bad.
4. Revenge is not the answer! (Not what you want to here). This will only lower you to their very poor standards.
5. Don't think all blame can be laid at the parent's door (obviously depending on what the parents' are like though). Maybe they don't know - maybe it's worth highlighting to them etc.
There is never an easy answer or solution to bullying. I hate this topic and people who do this with a passion!!!!
You don't say how old you/your sister is so i'd say speak to your parents. Unite behind your sister and show her how great a person she is and that this is not her problem IT'S THE BULLIES!!!!!

She will get through this and believe me she will come out a better and stronger person! I speak from personal experience of being bullied at school and by a certain manager at my work (who no longer works with me - thank heavens).

Again give you sis my love and thoughts are with her!

Answer 3

Girls are different to boys when they bully, girls tend to take the sneaky psychological approach, where the boys are more physical. People call them cowards, I don't believe that, I think that they get a great feeling of power and domination by belittling others, usually smaller and smarter than they are.
I was bullied from the age of 6 it made me so run down by the age of just over 7 that I became seriously ill and nearly died.
I overcame this with the help of my family, and at the age of 15 (I had been bullied for 9 years at this stage) my family moved us back to Ireland from England simply because of all the bullying, it was relentless. I must say it was the best thing my parents have ever done for me, but having said that the damage had been done and at age 17 I tried to commit suicide, only my best friend called unexpectedly and therefore saved my life.
I am now 45, a qualified graphic designer with my own company, I am happy but I do not trust people easily and choose my friends with great care.
You don't say if your sister is still alive - I hope so, because there is more help these days. If she didn't survive, I am so, so, so very sorry.
I dreamt of revenge for years, but then I realised I would be no better than those who had tormented me for so long.
May your God give you solace and guidance.
xxxCozy.

Answer 4

it happens a lot out of every 5 student there is 1 who is getting bullied in U.S.A it is a horrible subject and people who do it are described as weak because they bully to build a strong charcter or to feel stronger which doesn't even make sense people are aiming to put an offical law to bullying it happened in few countries but now currently most of the countries around the world don't have an official rule against bullying it has many victims that died because of it which makes it even more horrible they died by suicide or bully attacks and bullying causes deprission and suicidal thoughts and self harm (which may lead to death if you accedently hit a nerve) that is what i actually know

Answer 5

It's sick and needs to be stopped. It's only groups of children that do it, not individuals (they are normally cowards on their own). Yes I think girls are worse than boys - certainly when I was at school it was the case.
Parents are responsible, but so are the schools and more needs to be done by the government to provide help and support in the school for victims. The school should also have better powers in punishing the bullies.
It makes me sick and I can understand your desire for revenge - I was bullied when I was about 9 or 10 and I used to dream about visiting the ring leader in the small hours and doing something evil to them. If I were ever to face that girl again I would probably spit in her face.
Revenge isn't the answer, though. Complain to the school until you are blue in the face and MAKE them do something about it.

Answer 6

I think guys bully other guys who are nerds/geeks or are fat and they make fun of them or steal their money etc... Girls might be worse thought coz they work more in groups (guys there is usually one main guy and then others to back that guy up , yo laugh...) Also girls change their friends as much as they change their clothes - my sister would be best friends with someone one day and then be worst enemies the next. Girls also bully other girls mentally - insulting, saying they are fat..... I think bullies are usually people who are cowards, are bad at everything else so feel they need to make others feel worse than them or are just bad people. I think bullies should be punished more coz some of the people they bully do end up having problems for the rest of their lives.

Answer 7

not always the parents fault. They usually have very low self-esteem,and dont feel good inside,whatever that may be. They feel the need to hurt those they envy or are jealous of. A lot of those kids have a bad home life,and they dont know how to deal with the anger/sadness they have built up inside. There is no excuse for bullying other ppl. My oldest son was bullied in elementary when he was in second grade,by a fourth grader,much bigger than he was,the teachers did nothing,no matter how many times I complained about this,so finally I told my son the next time he starts in on him,to beat the living sh*t out of the kid,and to not stop hitting until a teacher broke it up,to not allow that child to get on top of him,now I dont promote fighting,but if no one was going to protect my child,then he needs to protect himself. He was never bullied again.

Answer 8

Sorry to hear that.
I can't speak from experience because i'm lucky enough to never have been bullied. I think both girls and boys are as bad as each other. Boys use their strength and the girls can be really bitchy and words hurt just as much a physical violence, girls can be violent too.
I don't think the parents are always to blame, children can be bullies regardless of their background and upbringing. Anything can cause it, be it television, newspapers or a person's peers.

Answer 9

A person will only bully you if you let them. If you back down and show that your scared of them then that gives them the right to walk all over you. Tell your sister to stand up for herself and if that doesn't work then square it out after school in the parking lot because nobody deserves to be bullied and if you have to you can watch to make sure nothing happens to your little sis. Good Luck!

Answer 10

I am sorry that your sister has had to go through this and she is very lucky to have a brother like you to support her. The best thing you can do is tell her often how much she means to you all and how beautiful she is inside and out. Bullies are cowards and they don't think of the consequences of their actions but what goes around will come around. Your sister is better than them and was probably bullied through jealousy. I sincerely hope she gets through this and wish you, your sister and your family best wishes for happiness and the strength to look to the future.