My Heart Beats For You
For all the time we'll spend apart
For the future lost and forgot
For all the laughs we could have shared -
My heart beats for you.
For the fighters we are within
How we can be together through thick and thin
Because I'll never find another one like you -
Is the reason my heart beats for you.
In the dark, I stand alone
What comes of us, I do not know
And the only sound that can be heard
Is my heart - which beats for you.
I will not measure in days or years
I will not remember the hours and tears
Instead I'll count until I see you again
How many times my heart beats for you
Lay your hand upon my chest
Forget the remorse, forget the regret
Feel the pain, feel the sorrow
Learn why I feel theres no tomorrow.
The blood that rushes through these veins
Has been weakened by amounts of pain
Yet at the center, still pumping it through
Is my heart - still beating for you.
not done lol, one more verse, but ill run out room
2007-03-22 09:55:57 · 6 answers · asked by me 1 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Other - Arts & Humanities
Listen to the sounds that are hard to hear
Listen to the voices that rid your fears
Listen to your heart, what it speaks if true
It'll tell you why my heart beats for you.
ok tell me your opinions about the poem itself, maybe what it means to you and how you connect to it. share experiences if you want. thanks!
2007-03-22 09:57:22 · update #1
Listen to the sounds that are hard to hear
Listen to the voices that rid your fears
Listen to your heart, what it speaks is true
It'll tell you why my heart beats for you.
ok tell me your opinions about the poem itself, maybe what it means to you and how you connect to it. share experiences if you want. thanks!
2007-03-22 09:58:46 · update #2
The rhyme scheme makes it seem a little too simplistic, but it's a nice poem. Clear expression of feelings but not much metaphorically speaking would make it a good song, moreso than a good poem. Probably not the best poem I've ever read, but for an amateur you're on your way. Keep writing!
2007-03-22 10:00:58 · answer #1 · answered by squirrelgirl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
People whose opinions are worth having on the seemingly endless subject of 'is my poem good' are NOT answering. There is a reason for that. Enjoy writing your poetry but it's probably best not to share it with strangers. Good luck.
2007-03-25 19:43:42 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This contains a number of hackneyed phrases, the rhyme is forced, the subject is trite, and I just don't care for it.
When you're writing about love, try to write something deeply personal and not so deliberately bland. The more personal it is, the more universal it is.
That is, if it doesn't suck. Most things suck.
2007-03-22 10:14:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
That is a great poem. I like it. I wish I was better at writing poetry!
2007-03-22 10:08:03 · answer #4 · answered by dew_angel 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
wow that is such an awesome poem you should get it published. i would buy it!!
2007-03-22 10:00:15 · answer #5 · answered by T.M.L. 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think of my wife who is away
2007-03-22 10:04:18 · answer #6 · answered by sreekrishnakrupa 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋