I HAD A QUESTION OUT THERE BUT IT WAS NOT ANSWERED YET. I AM WITH SOMEONE WHO IS NOT AFFECTIONATE AND WHO IS VERY INSENSITIVE AND WHO CUTS ME DOWN AND BLAMES ME FOR OUR MARITAL FIGHTS. HE PUNISHES ME BY REFUSING SEX . I FEEL AWEFUL. HE WAS NOT LIKE THAT WITH HIS EX HE ALWAYS WANTED TO MAKE LOVE TO HER AND WITH ME HE REFUSES. I AM NOT FAT OR UGLY...PLEASE HELP
2007-03-22 09:47:36 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I was with someone exactly like that for too long. Nothing I did was right. I tried everything, but it wasn't enough. I didn't want to give up on him, but finally I had enough and broke off with him. It was difficult at first, but I came to realize that it was his problem, not mine. Within two years I found the perfect man. We adore each other. We think alike. We never get tired of each other. We've been together 25 years and married over 20 years.
I used to have to draw blood for a living. When I first started out, sometimes I'd stick the needle in the vein and nothing would come out. Then, unfortunately, I'd have to stick another vein--or even more. I soon realized that the secret of drawing blood is picking the right vein in the first place, no matter how long it takes. The secret of a good marriage is picking the right man, no matter how long it takes.
Good luck to you. I understand what you're going through--I really do.
2007-03-22 10:02:43 · answer #1 · answered by gossamer 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This isn't really an 'answer' but really I just want to let you know that I was in a relationship like this where everything was controlled by my boyfriend and I got out. Here I am 2 years later, and I couldn't be more independent and in love with myself (not in a bad way). I realized that I was better than the poop he made me believe I was, and couldn't feel better about the decision. Good luck with doing what you know you need to do...
2007-03-22 17:55:29 · answer #2 · answered by d_nanner 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get rid of him. Sounds like a jerk. How do you know how he was with his ex? Just because he says or she says doesn't mean it is true. He has a problem and do not blame yourself. There are plenty of men who cherish their wives. You need to find one. You have to go through a lot of jerks before you find the right one, but they are out there. Don't waste your life on a jerk.
2007-03-22 16:52:28 · answer #3 · answered by Audrey C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I love and cherish my wife. We've been married for almost 20 years and she does it for me after all these years.
As for you, first of all, don't use all caps, it implies you're yelling. Second, you need to get some professional help, counseling for both of you. If he won't go, then you go by yourself but it's pretty apparent that something has to change.
Bottom line, if your husband won't straighten out, you can always leave him. There truly are men that will love and cherish you.
Take care and good luck!
2007-03-22 17:21:09 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats actually grounds for a divorce. He is not interested in a wife. It seems that he is interested in someone he can control mentally by refusing physical affection.
Are you doing the same? Is he having an affair and this is just a cover?
2007-03-22 16:51:48 · answer #5 · answered by DAD_to_3 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Those are symptoms of a bigger issue. I would suggest some counseling - either w/ a professional, a pastor or even close friends who are older & can give some advice - I would encourage you to stop nagging (if you are) treat him w/respect, love him & be patient & see if he comes around. Plan a nice surprise dinner or outing, see how he reacts, but make him feel good about himself - if that doesn't work, pursue the counseling. ok?
2007-03-22 16:53:21 · answer #6 · answered by Forever 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You shouldnt put up with that. After 15 years of marriage, I love my wife more now than the day we said I do.
2007-03-22 17:10:36 · answer #7 · answered by Glenn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yep, that sounds horrible. Ask him to accompany you to the marriage counselors. If he refuses, tell him that it's very important that you two go. Tell him that you think your future as a married couple pretty much depends on it.
2007-03-22 16:53:52 · answer #8 · answered by Dino 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh man Pinky. You need to get some external help. You and your husband need to talk to someone. This is very heartbreaking what this man is doing to you. Please consider talking to a counseller he will really help with the insanity (not that your insane but the way your being treated is insane). He can help you. Please go.
2007-03-22 17:11:07 · answer #9 · answered by prouddaddy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
BS, you were that Hag jumping all over Momma K earlier. After seeing you attack that lady for no reason, I am surprised that you even have a husband or one that has not left you yet.
2007-03-22 17:04:41 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋