I want to know if it will be hard for me to find someone else? My husband tells me that no one would want me-but he still accuses me of cheating. He says it is because I can't contribute to a relationship-I have no job and we have 3 kids. I have no job b/c he does not want me to work. I am still very young-23-I am in college-I have a 4.0-but since I have been married-My husband ruined my credit. I am not ugly or fat-I have confidence issues b/c he puts me down. Will it be hard to find someone else(I know I am not ready yet-rebound) and what kind of person are they likely to be?
2007-03-22 07:55:02 · 30 answers · asked by orangecat43 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
you sound strong enough to make it - hang in there, and good luck!
2007-03-22 07:58:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think your husband may be in for a rude awakening. Good thing you are in school, keep with it, that will help you take care of your kids. Well if you really don't want to make it work anymore with your hubby, it will be hard, you have three kids and you will probably have them most of the time, you will be in a different home, and you could still go to school but you may need a job to help. He will have to help pay for the kids as well. It will be a challenge you have to be picky when it comes to finding someone new, he has to be willing to take on three kids, and not tolerate them but actually be a father figure. A man like that may be hard to find.
2007-03-22 15:43:32 · answer #2 · answered by Vegas 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hell no girl! Sounds like he's the bum! Dont wait for him to divorce you....you should get your stuff together and leave his butt. If he is accusing you of cheating....and you honest to god have not cheated on him......it is his guilty conscience talking because he has cheated on you. If you really want to know....get yourself dressed up and go out with the girls one night. He's a big boy, he can watch the kids for night. It will do 2 things. It will show him that your JOB is watching your kids and keeping the household together which is NOT as easy as it sounds. It will also show you that there are ALOT of guys out there who are looking for a nice girl with some potential and not just a stay at home slave/baby factory. 23 is a good age to take your life back and live for you and your kids. They have to be your number one priority. You still have time to get away from him, get on your feet, and give your kids the life that you and them all deserve! Good luck!
2007-03-22 15:04:00 · answer #3 · answered by joeinchino2000 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Finding someone new after a divorce should be the LAST thing on your mind. Put that energy into going to school or finding a decent job to support yourself and your kids.
Your husband sounds immature and demeaning. Don't listen to what he says about you. If you do get a divorce, you'll find someone soon enough. Just use that time to be there for your kids at their time of need.
2007-03-22 15:01:31 · answer #4 · answered by Jasmine Lily 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well its a good thing that your not UGLY or FAT because gosh what would happen then? you should watch what you say and how you say it because others may take offense, but if your a beautiful woman then there is nothing for you to worry about I'm sure that with in time you will find another significant other and things will come together, be hope full and dont put so much pressure on your self to find someone it is OK to be alone especially after getting out of serious relationship as marriage...you'll be fine just dont give up or give in and all will be OK!!!
2007-03-22 15:03:13 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You will be fine. What is it with those types? My husband is like this. I am 28, and he likes to remind me that I am too nuts for anyone to want me besides him. He forgets that I had a life before I met him, its only been since that I have not. Keep your head on, stay in school, take good care of you kids, and you will find someone, hopefully that has a little more respect for you.
2007-03-22 15:00:20 · answer #6 · answered by heather 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is the classic thing a Control Freak would say. You cant get anyone else. He is only saying this because he knows it works....Your answer, Don't let it work. Get your self esteem back. You got him didn't you. Let him know that Women always have the upper hand, they have what all men want...You most likely could get someone else, but why would just want someone else. Make a goal, to get your self esteem back, so you can be happy and can be able to make someone Else happy....
2007-03-22 15:01:11 · answer #7 · answered by surfinnorcal77 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't focus on getting a man, focus on improving your life. Finish college and there will be lots more opportunities for you.
Your spouse is basically abusing you mentally by saying those things. People get divorced and move on with their lives all the time. You can, too.
Take care of your kids and be happy in life and you will find your own happiness and perhaps someone who cares about you to share it with. Good luck!
cheers!
2007-03-22 15:00:08 · answer #8 · answered by deepseaofblankets 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it will not be difficult to find someone else, the danger of course is repeating the same relationship. Please after the divorce get some counseling. Those who don't learn from history , are doomed to repeat it, and I'm sure you don't want to do this again. Theres a lot of great guys out there, and plenty of jerks too. Fix you first.
2007-03-22 15:00:45 · answer #9 · answered by EGOman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are caught in the same "catch-22" I was in with an abusive husband.
Here's what you need to do. You need to look after your own financial wellbeing. One thing that does not work in today's dating climate is for a woman to be a financial liability for a man. You need to be in a position to support yourself and take care of your kids - so you can tell a man to take a flying f-u-c-k if it's not working.
Once you get your peace of mind back, you will be fine. you are still attractive. You will rehab your credit, get GOOD child support and property settlement, and resume making something of yourself that you can be proud of.
2007-03-22 15:01:42 · answer #10 · answered by justbeingher 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is saying those things to control you.. which is abuse.. you need to leave him NOW..
You might find it hard at the start but there are plenty of support groups out there.. YOu will make it. you sound like a very strong person.
I am sure there is someone out there for you who will treat you a hella lot better then the man you have now..
Leave him before things get worse
2007-03-22 15:01:37 · answer #11 · answered by Angel 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋