post natal depression is taking me over and i dnt know what to do?

Question

i am a single mum of a 6 month old and have no friends or knowhere to go i feel isolated from life and sometimes wish i was gone. how do i change these feelings or make sum friends?

Answer 1

see your doctor or midwife asap hun, I was the same, still am occasionally and my daughter's 4 now, I find it very difficult to make friends, and often feel like I can't do anything, get yourself out to the library or something, or to a baby group. Maybe talk to your health visitor, see if she will go with you for the first session? Good luck. xx

Answer 2

Where do all you people get off telling this poor woman that its actually called postpartum depression. Who cares what its all called, we all understand what she means! What she needs is some love, understanding etc, not know-it-all's correcting her.

Anyway, I am so so sorry to hear what you are going through. I too felt like this, my husband I moved from the UK to the USA, 2 months before our baby was due and I felt so alone, in a foreign country with no friends or family and it is very difficult to make friends but you would be surprised how many people there are that feel like you but sadly people don't like to come out and say for some reason they feel ashamed, why I do not know. It can last months and months and even a couple of years I beleive and my doctor prescribed me Zoloft, which helped a great deal. Unfortunatley it did such a good job that I thought I was better so stopped it, but now am back where I was and my little girl is 11 months old.

Where to you live, if you are in the UK, your health visitor would be someone really good to talk to, however, they don't exist in the US, so won't be much help. Do some searches on the internet for post partum, post natal and you may find some support groups, people going through the same as you are often the best kind of support.

It's hard to get over the isolation, a baby consumes all your time, so there is nothing left for you. Try to think of all the good things that will come when your baby gets older. The kind of love that a child gives its parent when it gets bigger is so rewarding. It's so unconditional and uncomplicated (like husband/wife love) and then you really won't feel isolated as you will have this little person that dotes on you and completely idolises you, its just too young to be able to express that at the moment.

Also if you are in the UK you should be able to find some mum coffee mornings somewhere. You don't say whether or not you work (I doubt it being a single parent) but I decided to do some work, although I don't earn anything as the childcare costs almost as much as I earn, it does give me that time away from the baby, so perhaps this is something you could consider, but if you are on benefits then you could be worse of so may not be an option.

What about volunteering for something some kind of charity work that you could take the baby along to. Usually at those kind of things there are plenty of older people, that love little babies and could be much more help to you than making younger friends. I have made a few "older" friends since coming to the US and am surprised at how entertaining they can be!

I hope this has been of some help to you and if you want some more help, or someone to talk to, then e-mail me, I think you can contact me somehow through this thing.

Good luck and remember that often the most painful things in life turn out in the end to be the most rewarding.

Answer 3

First, I would see your doctor to deal with the depresssion. I am sure you know postpartum depression is very real and also not uncommon 0 to 6 months and well beyond. The hospital you gave birth at may have a support group. You could try meeting others at story hour at the bookstore or library, organized play groups, or through mom website online. Try searching for parenting support groups. Make sure you are getting some physical activity with sun exposure (a Vitamin D booster) by walking or going to the playground at your park. Even though your child is only 6 months she/he will still enjoy these activites. I am sure your feelings are not reflective for your love for your little one. That love will get you through!!

Answer 4

First talk to either your doctor or health visitor, dont be scared to let them know, you could join a baby and mothers group to make some new friends for you and the little one, have you heard of a website called net mums, it's a great way to find other people in your area, and also for advice and help with looking after the little one.

Answer 5

Join a local mother and baby group so that you can share experiences with other mothers. Try your local library or search on the net . I don't knoe if there's a Sure Start in your area. It's a good avenue for meeting other parents.

Talk to your health visitor, check out this website www.gingerbread.com, it's a support group for single parents.

Answer 6

Hello, I'm sorry to hear things are tough for you. Talk to the health visitors nd see if there are any mother and baby groups you can join. Once you talk to other mums you'll relaise that many have the same feelings as you. Also talk to your GP - it's important that you get help if you require it e.g medications. These people are there to support you not judge you. Good luck and best wishes.

Answer 7

hey i am a nurse and am 24 weeks pregnant with pre natal depression and am recently single it is so important that you have some one to talk to , you can always chat to me at
[e-mail]
Speak to your doctor if you feel that councelling or medication may help you, if they do not seem like options that would work for you try and make time for yourself, wait till she is asleep and treat yourself to a nice bath a glass of wine, its iportant to rememeber that you are not just a baby machine you are still your own person, spoil yourself every now and then, and keep a diary so you can monitor how you are feeling but set a rule that you always have to write at least one positive thing in it, and always et your self little things to look forward to like next monday going out shopping for example, Good luck im always here if you want medical advice or just a chat
xx

Answer 8

hi, please don't feel like this- have you looked to see if there are any mother baby/toddler groups in your area? I too felt so lonely and isolated but I joined a couple of these and they are only a pound or 2 a week and definatly worth it- I never imagine myself enjoying these but it gives me something to look forward to and me and my baby tend to make an afternoon of it. If you don't know where to find out ask your GP, Health Visitor or look online. Please don't give up your baby needs it's Mummy, talk to your GP as well- you will be surprised at the support out there. Good luck to you both

Answer 9

i had pnd after my 2nd baby(4 years ago) and the world was such a lonely place, i hated it. i had two beautiful babies but i was so alone. im now a more confident now and in the last year i have made lots of new friends after joining a weight watcher and a mother n toddlers group with my two year old, i know its not easy i could never have joined a m&t 4 years ago but if youve got 1 friend or even your mum to go with you for the first cple of times till you feel relaxed. il be happy to chat to you if you contact me with your email address or instant messager id.

Answer 10

You talk to your dr as soon as possible and let them know how you are feeling. I went through PPD myself. There are medications that can and do help. I didnt want to tell ppl out of fear they would think I was a bad person but once I did and was put on the medication I was fine. My dr even said he thought that I'd go through ppd since I had such a stressful pregnancy and all the things going on in my life such as my daughters illness and he was right.