I have a very high sex drive but my husband doesn’t...?

Question

I also want him to be more adventurous and take charge more, how can I do all this?

Answer 1

Talk to him. My wife has a higher sex drive than me. Most of the time, all she has to do is initiate it, and I'll go along. I like it when she's more aggressive and demanding.
But, quite often she isn't and doesn't initiate, just complains. Next time the opportunity arises, take him by the hand and lead him to the bedroom. Then tell him what to do, step by step, until you're satisfied, include some adventurous things you'd like. The next day, tell him it's his turn to be in charge, and submit yourself to it. Once you get him started he should loosen up. Don't let him orgasm if he isn't cooperative. Blue balls can be a great motivator.
Can you communicate privately with him while he's at work? My wife drives me wild talking dirty to me on instant messenger. Some days by the time we get home together we're both so worked up we have to go to the bedroom before the dinner table.
Back to the beginning, talk to him. And keep talking. Tell him what you want and need. Get him to tell you what he wants and needs.

Answer 2

Very easy question to answer...glad you asked.

First tell your husband the problem. He could be tied up in work or daily activities...he may not even notice a problem. Make him aware that you have a higher sex drive and want to quench it. Also, let him know that you want to take charge and be more adventurous in the bedroom.

This should give him the opportunity to observe that he has been ignoring you and your needs some, and give him the opportunity to change.

If there still seems to be a problem, start cheating on your husband and hitting it off with young guys who can satisfy your needs...and do nasty things to you that make you want to take a hot shower and cry.

Answer 3

All good answers but neglected the source. Testoserone is responsible for sex drive urges males obviously have lot's of it and should be raring to go. Perhaps there is a medical problem, have you asked? Discussion/communication is vital to the whole deal of course. Depression can also be the culprit. So send him off to get a check up and if you haven't already talked about this now is the time. If all of this effort doesn't get you at least some occasional cheerful rampant monkey sex then perhaps it is time to DTMFA and take up with one of these young bucks above that are willing and able. Good luck to both of you.

Answer 4

Have you talked about each other's fantasies? If you haven't, then this might be a way to get started. If you are or your husband is too bashful to talk about sexual fantasies, then perhaps you can write one of yours down and leave it where he can find it or you can email it to him. In what you write, make sure you give hints or make it clear what your desires are. In it, also include anything you know about what arouses him. Encourage him to write something similar for you. If neither of you likes to write, then use a recording device to deliver the message. You may even consider a surprise present of a home video to tickle his fancy.

The bottom line is that you can't coerce him to be someone he isn't. You can do your best to be as erotic as possible to enhance the chances that he will allow his sexuality to roam more freely.

Some questions to consider: Do you share other activities? Are things good between you otherwise? Do you talk about your relationship? How you answer the above questions may give you clues about his lack of drive. Good luck!

Answer 5

You need to talk to your husband about it. It may or may not help, but you have to try. It may not increase his sex drive but maybe you can at least encourage him to be more adventurous. I am in the same situation, I have a high sex drive and my wife does not, so I know what you are talking about. Good Luck.

Answer 6

I have a very high sex drive too and my boyfriend told me I was sinful and need to let my sex drive go. He said sex is only to have a child. He lost his mind. Anyways, I would sit him down and talk to him. You are married and are suppose to be able to talk about everything and anything, to take care of each other in everyway. That's what a good relationship is suppose to be. Good luck!!

Answer 7

Have him checked for low testosterone levels. ... more adventurous? Just ask, I bet he'd love to get a bit wild. Maybe he likes that you take charge, some men like an aggressive woman.

Answer 8

You really have to just tell him how you feel- or better show him. Go get some hot lingerie and maybe a kama sutra book and spice things up! I'm sure once you show him what you like and what you want it will spice him up too. My boyfriend gets unadvenurous sometimes and doesn't seem to into sex but as soon as I start spicing things up he realizes what he has been missing!

Answer 9

1st
Communicate, communicate, communicate.
If that doesn't work I suggest a therapist, preferably a sex therapist.
If you and your spouse do not find common ground it may lead to avenues that may be destructive to your marriage.
I might add that you may want to do some personal inventory on yourself and see if there are any areas that you can improve on to enhance his desire.
Sometimes, weight, personal hygiene, time restraints, kids, work, stress, low self-esteem, money issues or another woman can lead to diminished intimacy.
I wish you the best.

Answer 10

dont b shay & tell him what makes u feel happy & exsiting and try 2 help him 2 reach both of u the full satisfaction that u want help him