Step-son moved in 4 months before we were married! He's 40 years old and trashes our home! Leaves dirty socks piled in living room and dirty clothes on floor in bathroom and junk and dirty clothes in his bedroom! He has trashed the back yard with junk! He interferes in our conversation's and we have no privacy! He comes home from work takes off his socks and plops on sofa! Will not do anything around the house. When he lived on his own he had trash in every room and you could not walk! He let his utility's get shut off and my Wife had to bail him out! He makes good money but only gives us 75.00 a week! I recently lost my job and we have to live off of my Wifes SSI. which is around $625.00 a month. When my Wife ask him to clean up his act he raises his voice and uses the foulest words! This is causing a conflict in our Marriage. I confronted him about raising his voice and the laungage and he told me he would tear me up! I know the man has a mental issue but you can't say anything! Help
2007-03-22 03:15:07 · 12 answers · asked by mkdenton1943 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Being unemployed we are in a catch 22 situation! The little money her son contributes has to go towards insurance,utility bills,and house payment, and food there is nothing left. This man will spend $22.00 for a delivered pizza and eat a large by himself without offering any! I cook meals and when he is broke he just helps himself! I am at my wits end and he doesn't care if he splits us up. All he cares about is himself and taking over our computer and our tv in livingroom when he comes home from work! Just to get away from him I have to go upstairs in our bedroom ! This really SUCKS!!!
2007-03-22 03:30:10 · update #1
My Wife does not like the way her son is and we both have talked this over and always come up with a deadend! She sees it my way. We need the extra income at this time and I guess there is no solutions!
2007-03-22 04:37:19 · update #2
I would tell him to get the hell out of the house. He is not respecting your wife, and he is threating you. Call the police if you must, as you said he has mental issues, he could do some thing irrational, we hear stuff like that on the news all the time. Protect yourself and your wife from him. I know your wife must feel like she has to help him, but he will not see the error of his ways if someone is enabling him. Some people are just a--holes, and they will never change.
2007-03-22 03:36:26 · answer #1 · answered by Maria A. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's has to go
2014-05-04 12:03:16 · answer #2 · answered by Trex 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no, if you do it the right way. ( wow hard question) ( kind of yes and no ) he was able to pay the rent right,( you can tell him that he can not stay forever and that he will have to get his own home and that you will help him an {kind of lay down the law} ) that the first step. (if he has a good paying job to support himself ) he find a descent home for the time being and may want to help him pay the bills ( that is what i will do for may be 1 2 3 mouth the most) if he ask for some help. help him. if that do not work, ( i kind of go crazy.) by the looks of it i do not think you want him to live with you for rest of his life. meanest Serrano you can just kick him out but to be Unionist i would not act so boldly but in the end it come to what 'you' decides ( if he keep acting that way tell it to him straight if he is going to be like he don`t have to live with you.) Am I in the wrong to want my 20 year old step-son to move out of our home ASAP? no (times are tough i may be wrong. i highly think not)
2016-03-28 23:31:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry about your situation. First, he is 40! He should be out on his own. His mother, your wife, needs to sit down with him and set the rules so it is clear and without misunderstanding what is expected of him. You should be there as a presence, too. It is a privilege for him that you allowed him shelter in your home and he is taking advantage of it and your wife is allowing it. I know finances are really tough, but I think a minimum of $100 week is in order, unless he doesn't pay for his food. If that's the case, then he should be paying at least $150.00 per week.
He needs to respect your home and your marriage. If he can't show respect for you, your wife and your home, then as hard as it may be, he needs to move out.
ADD:
How does you wife feel about this situation? Is she okay with it? If not, then you and your wife need to form a union and get your lives back.
2007-03-22 03:29:15 · answer #4 · answered by Lila 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I am sorry to have to tell you the plain truth but shame on you and your wife for allowing a 40yr old man to disrespect you & your home that way..You really have nobody to blame but yourselves.People can only treat you the way that you ALLOW them too.You are not doing this 40yr old any favors by enabling him.Get him out of your home NOW..If you want him to live with you to help contribute then that is what you allow him to do set rules and guidelines make it very clear as to what is expected of him and if he does not live by your rules & guidelines then kick his sorry but out..It is clear that your wife has babied this guy all his life and it is time that she stops.If he has threatened you then you need to act on it call the police don't allow him to treat you that way he is nothing but an old baby and a bully...
2007-03-22 03:45:39 · answer #5 · answered by Maureen B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You and your wife need to get on the same team about this issue. If you do that, if you're working together, understanding each other's feelings about it and working towards a resolution that makes each of you happy, then this *can't* split you up.
How does she feel about it? Do you understand her feelings, fears, concerns? Does she understand yours? What do you do to help each other to better deal with this situation? What do you do together to try to resolve it?
2007-03-22 04:24:45 · answer #6 · answered by Maureen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Throw him out! For gosh sake, he's 40 years old! And he makes good money???? Why on earth is he living with you guys? Kick him out
Good Luck!
2007-03-22 03:20:52 · answer #7 · answered by <3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kick him out and if she doesn't like it let her go with him. You should not have to take that from a grown man.
2007-03-22 03:32:28 · answer #8 · answered by kitkat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kick him out. He's 40...you can do that.
2007-03-22 03:20:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Throw him out of he house..
2007-03-22 03:18:49 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋