Difficult situation with a friend?

Question

Ive had this friend for about 6 months and we have turned into close best friends.The problem is I like this girl a lot & there’s a bit of age gap.I have tried not seeing her for a while and went back to being friend’s and realized it didn’t help. She knows that i like her and we have talked it over but she only sees me as a friend.

The problem is I think I have fallen in love with her & she doesn't know and the main problem is I am fed up with how I am feeling. When I am out with friends I sometimes feel awarked/uptight or jealous and got angry with one of my friend trying to kiss her.I have thought about cutting her out of my life but I can see this hurting her and will cause some problems with my other friend’s but at the same time I don’t want to lose her as a friend!

I have left this question before but could do with some more advice before making a decision.

Update

I think i am going to tell how i feel and ask for time apart and maybe fade her out as a friend.As I don't want to go back down the road and i know i will end up feeling like this at the weekend.

To atom45 she didn't let him kiss her.She pushed him back.

Answer 1

My best friend went through this with a guy (she was you in the situation)....this whole scenario drug on for 5 years and just in the past few months has she "gotten" that you can not make someone feel the same way you do!

First of all, my recommendation is to LET HER GO....I mean the dream of being with her romantically. This is not healthy for you or her. Who cares who you upset by distancing yourself from her or the group of friends. I know this is easier in theory than in practice...but for goodness sakes no one else is going to take care of you BUT YOU!!!!

Second, the jealous thing has GOT TO GO...no woman (no matter what age) finds this attractive! It's actually quite repulsive. If there is someone out there that she is more compatible with (regardless of what you think of the person) than you should be happy for her. Acting like a jealous fool is not going to help the situation...but I guarantee being a man about the situation will at least earn you respect...probably not the girl but neither will jealousy!

No one likes rejection, no one says this is not going to hurt.....but you have to believe if we all died from broken hearts and rejection than there would be very few humans around!!!! So buck up, let her go and give yourself some space from her, the group or all of it FOR YOU...not anyone else.

Answer 2

This looks like a triangle love. It is obvious that she is not that much interested in you because she allowed one of your friends to kiss her. Is there any point in your being possessive of her? Love is a chemistry also. She should have the same feeling that you have for her otherwise there will be problems.
If you think that you cannot do away with her, then open your mind to her to see her reaction. Many problems are sorted out by being open. But be prepared to accept what ever be the outcome. I think what you now has is only an infatuation and you can get over it especially because you have this age difference too. Talk to her and decide.

Answer 3

She is a BULLY!!! incredibly how dare she only be certain to no longer confer with you and not even have the courtesey to tell you why. and you have been acquaintances??? Are you beneficial approximately that or became she using you for some thing? the actuality that she won't inform you why she isn't speaking to you shows there the two isn't one or if there is its a pathetic crap reason and she or he would not prefer you to comprehend. pay attention to me the final thank you to handle it incredibly is save on as favourite. nevertheless carry around with each and each of the acquaintances and say hi to her etc. do no longer slag her off to every physique as they'll all think of you are the *****. do no longer permit her think of she is attending to you, and don't substitute the way you act at school because of the fact of her. it incredibly is quite very difficult and that i reckon we've all been there in some unspecified time interior the destiny. only be your superb favourite self, she is a bully and at last poeple will see that she is the single being nasty, and speaking approximately you etc and if every physique asks you only say the actuality you haven't any longer have been given any thought and perchance they'd desire to ask her. good success, be stable and upward thrust above it she sounds like a real COW and a BULLY. do no longer permit her win - earlier long it is going to all be over. Make her look the pratt.

Answer 4

You have to cut all ties with her or suffer in silence. She has been honest with you and does not want more than friendship with you the ball is in your court. If you choose to remain in her life you must stop acting up. I hope you know this situation is not a good one for you she gets to keep you in her life on her terms but you care more about her being hurt than yourself? Friendship feeling are not as strong as in love feelings you are feeling the most pain here, you must remove yourself from the situation. Ride off into the sunset one of two things will happen, you will find someone that returns your feelings or when she sees you will not accept her terms she might decide she loves you to either way the friendship relationship is over move on, don't look back. Good luck it will be hard but it will be easier than staying friends with someone you love.

Answer 5

consider what you have at hand and ask yourself, is it worth it? do you really think you have a valid reason that you would not be satisfied with her friendship?

first and foremost, she is your friend. before you even considered having feelings for her, she was your friend. so as a friend, you got to understand what she's chosen to do. you have to respect the fact that she chooses you...as a friend. it's hard but that's the truth of the matter. considering the circumstances, it's best to be thankful she even decided to remain friends with you. [most cases end up without that kind of consolation]

if she really doesn't feel that way about you and you don't think she ever will, perhaps you have to learn to accept that and move on. she has her reasons and [at least as a friend] you have to respect and understand that. it's hard...really hard but sometimes [especially if love is concerned here] what matters most is that the person you care about is happy. sometimes, situations like this entail sacrifice despite how painful it is. perhaps you just got to learn to move on. after all, she just might not be the one yet. just think, you deserve someone who truly appreciates and accepts you for who you are and returns your affections. that's the ideal goal.

perhaps it's best to consider cutting it off if you really can't afford to make the sacrifice (i.e. a totally last resort). still, consider the decision carefully. most of the time, friendships aren't worth losing. after all, true friends are rare so why force yourself to lose one. just because she's not in love with you, it doesn't mean she can't be a great friend. the best advice that i could probably give you is that, in making your decision, think about what'll be best for you and for her.

Answer 6

If you tried a relationship and failed and she only sees you as a friend then thats all that you will be to her, a friend. You should try to meet other people and try to resolve your feelings for her. Find some closure and common ground with her and move on. If you cant do this then deleting all of who she is in your life is the only other option.

Answer 7

Listen up man. I've had such a situation with a girl. I really loved her and she thought that i'm just her friend. I couldn't stand this situation and told her my feeling. I told her: " I love you my princess." and after 2 days she told me that it doesn't make her upset. and now , after 1 year, she is my best girl and we love each other so much that u can't imagine.Just tell her. She is clever enough to give you a good answer. And remmember : DO NOT BE SCARED OF HER.

Answer 8

i always say .. when a girl want and love guy ... she will do the best she could to keep him !! its seems to me that she want you like a friend ... not more !! so .. you should keep your relation with her like a friends ....... at least front of here >> and don't never from now talk with her a bout your love >>>> don't give her any attention about that subject ... and react as a friend !! ..... if she didn't like this new way .. and she found that she want more attention from you .... and she miss that ... she will really think about you .... !!
and in this period you should try to forget here as a lover .... no one forget his emotions in couple of days or one week ... you need more time to forget !! but the important thing ... don't ever never ..... remember the nice days between yours . or listen to romantic songs .... !! its may help you to forget !1

Answer 9

stop being a Jealous angry Lesbo and internally make a firm decsion to just be her freind

Answer 10

den get over ur feelings for her....reacting this way among ur friends is the sure shot way that she would get fed with ur actions one day or the other...