This guy I know watched the remake of War of The Worlds and said "That dosen't even make sense! There wasn't Tvo back then!" We tried to explain to him that the new version is based on if it would happen now, not when the original was made. I don't think he ever got it though.
2007-03-21 22:27:36 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
I heard someone say theres no Santa Claus...*wink*
2007-03-21 22:44:16 · answer #1 · answered by *toona* 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
There's been so many.
I suppose my most recent favorite was the email from our CEO who told us all what a wonderful job we'd done and how he appreciated each and every one of us..how the company was more profitable than every before, and it was all because of us. Then said we were all getting a special bonus...this went on for three paragraphs. Then was the kicker...only if you made less than a certain amount, been there a year, was a full time employee, several other things which severely limited anyone getting it.
(*laughter*) I felt so special and appreciated.
The latest is, we're being reviewed not based on performance or quality of work, but on how much overtime we put in. However, if you do overtime it screws up the forecasting of how long things should take, so you're not supposed to put extra time down. It's a catch-22. I can't get a decent review without doing overtime, but when I do I screw up the forecast and I'm told not to do overtime.
(*laughter*) Corporations are the best source of stand up comedy routines. So much stupidity all in one place.
2007-03-22 07:00:36 · answer #2 · answered by Kaia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, the other day this woman I know was involved in an accident, well before she got hit there was a truck in front of her that didn't have any brake lights that worked, well she noticed the truck slowing down, so she did, then the truck came to a stop, and so did she, well needless to say the vehicle behind her didn't stop, she said this was a young girl about16-17 yoa. When the officer asked what happened the teen just said "She stopped in front of me!" I mean, uh, HELLO, what are you supposed to do when a vehicle stops in front of you, I always try to stop myself.
2007-03-22 05:41:42 · answer #3 · answered by rebelgrl00 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"You can hardly tell where the computer models finish and the real dinosaurs begin." - Laura Dern, actor, about the special effects in the movie Jurassic Park.
And this classic:
"Is this chicken, what I have, or is this fish? I know it's tuna, but it says 'Chicken by the Sea.'" - Jessica Simpson
And one last one for good measure:
"The internet is a great way to get on the net." - Bob Dole, Republican presidential candidate
2007-03-22 05:51:46 · answer #4 · answered by Bella-El 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All the time! I'm a nurse and a health worker I was working with (who has been a health worker for 20 years) told me she couldn't take a pulse without a machine. I thought she was joking. I then spent 15 minutes with her explaining and showing her how to take a pulse "manually" from feeling the wrist. OMG and this is someone who has been in the health industry for 20 years.
2007-03-22 05:42:58 · answer #5 · answered by skye 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
wow, that is dumb. well, my brother who is two years older than me, we would be in the living room and he'd lay down on the couch and fall asleep anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour, he would wake up all groggy and ask "was I asleep?" I hate that. I always say "if you can't remember anything that happened in the last 5 mins then yeah, and obviously if you had to ask that question" some people.
2007-03-22 05:32:53 · answer #6 · answered by experiMENTAL bunny 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A chick called Debbie Lloyd from Bateau Bay,NSW,Central Coast,Australia,said to me,eat **** and die.That was the stuppidest thing anyone ever said to me.
2007-03-22 06:08:33 · answer #7 · answered by nicegal_oz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hailing for a cab in a corner of a street in Manhattan, out of the blue, comes this woman and yells at me: This is my corner, I was here first!!! (She sounded like a b...)
I started to laugh and walked away.
2007-03-22 06:52:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
this might not be the stupidest thing I have heard, but it is the one I am thinking of at the moment. me and my children were out eating pizza, and a girl I know came up and asked, " what are ya'll doing?" to me this was stupid, because I mean I'm sitting there eating pizza, what does she think I am doing.
2007-03-22 05:35:11 · answer #9 · answered by Barbi W 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
"Jesus is my friend. He makes me smart when I am dumb!"
"Everyone knows that men are smarter than women."
Both quotes said by an old roommate of mine (female in her early 20s, ATTENDING UNIVERSITY and getting good grades). She was entirely serious both times and yes, she still believes it all.
Makes you wonder. Ugh. (note: I have nothing against Jesus--it's just the context of the quote that gets me!!!)
2007-03-22 05:34:16 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never wear a tin hat in the rain
2007-03-22 05:32:56 · answer #11 · answered by EvelynMine 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋