B/c although how much I love my boyfriend-he only works weekends and doesn't go to school. He is in debt with money. I am afraid that one day I might want to get married but he isn't going anywhere in life. sorry to post my problem on here. But, what are the odds he will get better?
2007-03-21 18:40:06 · 11 answers · asked by zombiefrog 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I said-does not go to school as in no school
He just works weekends nothing else.
2007-03-21 18:55:07 · update #1
The odds are, that he needs to empower himself somehow. Maybe he needs to redefine what he wants out of life so he has direction. You can help him with that... but by help I mean, support him and since nobody can make anybody do anything they don't want to do, the only person you can control in this equation is you. Either you love him enough to want to stand by him, or you are only looking out for yourself. And if it's the latter, then balance is needed here so that neither of you is missing out on what both of you really want from each other. Why don't you try talking to him about this... tell him how concerned you are about him... and then after all that sharing is over with, you will either grow together as a couple or you will both go your seperate ways, based on your needs. This is a process, like everything else in life. You really have to see it that way in order to get through this difficult stage in your relationship. The best thing to do is find common ground - sometimes that common ground will take you a long way in reigniting that potential that you once had together. Good luck!
Sincerely,
Angel
2007-03-21 18:51:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I can see that your bf must be tired since he has been working on weekends and going to school seems to be a chore for him. Well give him some encouragement to continue his education as it is important in life and he needs it to find a good job. As both of you are still young, I think you can also ask him to put aside some money everyday to save up if you intend to get married later in life. It will help in the long run. So yeah, be supportive and let him know you are behind him.
2007-03-22 01:53:02 · answer #2 · answered by happy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here's the deal on that as i see it. Men get married to a woman hoping that the woman won't change and women marry men hoping that the man will. In most cases neither one holds true. Get him out of there find someone that share's the same future goals as you. Doesn't mean that it will be "always and forever", but at least you have a foundation to build on.
2007-03-22 01:49:52 · answer #3 · answered by up all night 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The odds of him getting better? He doesn't have the flu, Darling, he's just complacent. Hmmm. Hate to burst your bubble, Sugar, but I wouldn't hold my breath. I mean, we'd have to factor in age, birth order, and wait for the bloomin' planets to align to get a clear cut, actual reading....but uh...I'll spare you.
Truly, laziness can and WILL create a rift in a relationship. But let's put a different spin on this....
Could it be that you're starting to grow away from him?
Initially, sure, it was great, you guys were having a ball, but now it's getting serious, and it doesn't look like his chosen path compliments yours.
No fear....talk to him. Ask him these questions, tell him your concerns. Get some answers too, because if he just says, "idunno..." he's damn near made up your mind for you.
If he's down to work things out with you, FABULOUS, and congrats!
Sounds like it's just the regular ole, run-o-the-mill stage of taking stock of life. Dig deep, girl!
Good Luck!
2007-03-22 01:50:22 · answer #4 · answered by kadara 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very little. Are you paying his way? Sounds like he knows he "has it good" and therefore isn't motivated to work, or go to school to better himself. Please strongly think about either, letting him know he needs to become more responsible for himself, get out of debt (by himself), or you can tell him, (if he doesn't work more, etc.) tell him to get lost. Immediately if not sooner. Take care.
2007-03-22 01:47:06 · answer #5 · answered by SAK 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Odds are definitely not good. I think you need to move on. If he is lazy now, picture how it will be when you are married.
2007-03-22 01:46:17 · answer #6 · answered by Mrs. Hester 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get away from it now!
Trust me now is the time before it's to late,
I'm talking from experience
They never change honey.
2007-03-22 01:45:27 · answer #7 · answered by rock on 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Odds are not good...
You need to break up and find a
better , more motivated / ambitious man....
2007-03-22 01:43:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he happens to be a pothead - about ZERO
Otherwise probably about 50%
2007-03-22 02:16:32 · answer #9 · answered by JET99 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A leopard doesn't change his spots and don't worry about asking questions about your problems- thats y we are here=)
2007-03-22 01:46:11 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋