I graduate from college in December so i am trying to decide if i should stay living in my apartment close to school until then and then break my lease or if i should move in with my boyfriend and his family. If i moved in with my boyfriend then i would be an hour away from the school but i would only have to go to school for one class in the fall which is taught on one day a week. So it would just be a one day a week one hour commute . But i would save $3300 on rent. On the other side, if i stayed in my apartment i would be closer to the school. And i am christian and am trying to figure out if it would be really bad for me to move in with my boyfriend and his family because i would be staying in his room with him. But we have been dating for 4 years and are probably getting married next year. And alot of my friends think that we should live together some before we get married. I am really confused and have to decide to renew my apartment or not by Saturday. Thank you for your advice!
2007-03-21 17:46:10 · 12 answers · asked by InLove621 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Dear inlove 62,
I am very glad to know that you are a christian. I am a Christian too . Base on what I have learned in the Bible that married is a very sacred matrimony.Living together before married is like playing with temptation because as you mention ,that if you will move in with his family, you would be staying with him in the same room. That will be very hard for you both not to be temptaed to have sex .Which is sacred and only married couple are suppose to do.Lovers should reserve this sacred thing for the first night after you get married. This will be the most beautiful gift you can ever give to your lover and to your self. Farther more I read a poster that says, 50% of the people who had premarital sex got divorse.I think none of us wants to get divorse.Not only because ,God doesn't aprove it but because it will break your heart,and break your family.
I think you should live in your appartment.It is more convenient for you. your reputation will not be down or dammaged. God would be Pleased,and you won't be disturb as much . You will be able to concentrate in your class.It will also keep you from getting stress in driving.
Living together with someone whom you didn't know before will also be a challenge at times. You will have to make adjustments with his family and more adjustment in the things that you do with your lover. It would be different. That is why it is good that when you do get married that you will have your own place with your husband so that you will be happier and Don't need to worry about other family members of your spouse. So Stay away from temptation . Stay focus on your study and Move in with him as soon as you are married.
You will be glad if you follow the leading of The Lord by reading your Bible. Thy word is a light unto my feet a light unto my path.This is a good statement from the bible that I believe . I believe that His word is my light and my guide. I Trusted the Lord to give me a husband .He is wonderful and we now have two chidlren. I have been so blessed just having somebody who cares so much and loves me.We have been married for 6 years.WE are Happy family for we have a God that we worship and trusted every day.
God has a special plan for you. A plan for you to succed.Please Take Hid of his word.So you will have peace and be directed accordingly. The more you study the Bible and be close to the Lord ,the clearer you can see His guidance in your life.
Thank you for reading and giving me an apportunity to help you.
God Bless and take care.
From someone who cares,
Arcel
2007-03-21 18:40:02 · answer #1 · answered by arcelielopes 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
look im only 12 but I help alot of people. you should stay back at home because you would save money on gas or bus or whatever but you would be paying the 3300 but think about it if you lived an hour away from your school than you would have to get up earlier which could make you fall asleep during class or fail a test it could also give you a higher chance of being late which could damage your grades but that is just my opinion but take it into perspective
2007-03-21 17:54:01 · answer #2 · answered by logan d 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you're questioning moving in with your boyfriend, that means you aren't ready. If I were you, I would wait until I was ready. Four years of being with someone (especially so young) doesn't necessarily mean that you know them. Living together will help, but! You will also be living with his parents, meaning, not only are you dependent on your boyfriend, but them as well. And not just you - he would be dependent on them too. So it's like just one big mess if something should go wrong and someone in the group changes their mind about the whole arrangement, and you never know... it could happen. Learn to be by yourself before becoming dependent on someone (and eventually marriage does mean that no matter who you are). By the time you learn what it means to be you, what it means to make your own money, what it means to go out into the world and discover all kinds of beautiful things, you will WANT to share them with him, and not simply by virtue of the fact that you have been together for so long. "Wanting to share" things with him is not the same as "having to". You're young. You have all the time in the world to get married and be a housewife. Stick to your faith - learn what it means to listen to other people - listen to their intention and why they want that for you - if it's a true intention and they think it would make you happy, then take it into consideration but this is your life. Listen to your faith, it will carry you further than a friend can. Good luck! Hope I helped!
Sincerely,
Angel
2007-03-21 18:00:50 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok first of all what apartment costs 3300? and second why does your boyfriend still live with his family? can you imagine living with your boyfriends parents? ugh trust me not fun not fun at all... if you like your independence find a cheaper apartment. or tell your boyfriend to move near you and get a cheaper apartment together. But don't live with his parents trust me it will be the biggest mistake of your life and will cause a lot and i mean a lot of fighting. I do believe that living together before marriage is a good idea
2007-03-21 17:50:30 · answer #4 · answered by Eclipse 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think about this: You and your boyfriend fight, and leave eachother. What happens then? Also, living with your boyfriend could have some temptation in there, even if his family is there. Although you might get married, living together is not a great test. It's more of a temptation as I said before... I'd say you shouldn't, but if you think otherwise, go on ahead and do what you feel you should.
2007-03-21 17:50:16 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-11-27 21:23:07 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good Day..young Lady..mmm..
quite a few things o think about..you do....
I think..you should stay where you are untill you finish your education.. it sounds like you should finish from where you stated learning these last few years..closer.."yes".. but if you break your lease...and the amount of travel time... you may not have saved that much on rent..mmm..
i am sure that your b/f would understand..as he could visit you..away from parents.. and you could still visit untill education finished..and maybe he will propose to you ..on bended knee..before moving in.. to know you truely are on holly ground..so..!!.
Good Luck...your future looks Bright indeed..
2007-03-21 18:01:45 · answer #7 · answered by david 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are a Christian, you know your answer already. It's not usually easy to walk that fine line, but always worth it in the end. As far as living together first,, well, you already know it's wrong, and of your friends suggesting this, how many have long successful marriages after doing this? Just a thought for you. Good luck to you.
2007-03-21 17:53:11 · answer #8 · answered by Paula T 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
on you know how you really feel.but if you want to be near
school then you should just keep the aptment., i would
think long term about living with his family that not alway
a good thing.. hopefully you will get marry down the road
but what if you dont. things change. especially since you
will be graduate in december. life will change for you
in every way.
2007-03-21 18:10:30 · answer #9 · answered by luckystar 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you just got a case of cold feet, being as this is so last minute & all. You need to figure out for yourself what you really want to do & don't worry about what anybody else has to say about it, you are the only one who knows what will make YOU happiest.
2007-03-21 19:22:21 · answer #10 · answered by love_um_or_leave_um 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋