My boyfriend and I live in his home. We do not want to marry.?

Question

He feels that if anything should happen to him (he is 60 and I am 50) his family will let me have the home. How can I be sure this will still be my home should he preceed me in death? Cost is an issue for both of us. Lawyers are expensive. Cheapest way please! Thank you all.

Answer 1

I'm not sure the state you reside in, but as an attorney in Michigan, I will address your question as if I were addressing a Michigan resident.

I would stay away from the will option. The reason for this is simple...when he dies, his family could potentially litigate the will during probate. This ends up being extremely costly and (to a certain extent) doesn't guarantee you success in court. While a will *is* a stong way to go, I would suggest that you two have a deed drawn up which names both you and he as joint owners with rights of survivorship.

Basically what that means is, you both own the house in equal shares, but as soon as one of you dies, the other becomes 100% owner of said house. The benefit to you is that it instantly makes you part owner in the house...so that if you two break up later in the future, you're still 50% owner in the house!

The only downside for you in this option is that you do become an owner of the house at that time and any appreciable value in the house is what you'd have to pay taxes on when you sell it. However, if you were given the house via a will, your interest in the home (for tax purposes) is whatever the value is at that time. So the calculated risk here is get the house *guaranteed* now (via deed) and then pay taxes if/when you sell it OR wait to get the house via a will and your interest is whatever the house is worth at the time you take via the will.

I would say a bird in the hand is better than two in the bush. Take the house FOR SURE now, and know you're getting the house, and deal with the taxes if and when you ever decide to sell it. Otherwise, you're taking a chance that A) he actually leaves you the house in his will, B) the family doesn't fight you in court for the house, and C) you actually do win the legal fight in court, if it comes to that!

Answer 2

Well, this may or may not apply to you. If you live in a state with common law marriage, than legally you can acquire your boyfriend's assests without being legally married. Common law marriage means that after a certain period of time the law recognizes you as a spouse. If you live in Texas, I believe you only have to live with the person for a week to a month (not too sure about the time period). If you live anywhere else, you might want to do a bit of research in your state. Otherwise I would suggest that you have your boyfriend write a will or note that is notarized and signed by him. Make sure that the circumstances are not in duress because his family could utilize that to null any agreement. In other words, make sure he is not writing this on his death bed. Notaries are not expensive by the way.

Answer 3

Ha! I have to laugh because he is really not in reality. If anything happens to him the first thing the family is going to do it evict you. He can put your name on the title of the house but that might not do it either because his relatives would be owning his half of the house if he dies and you would own the other half meaning you could not sell the house without their approval.

Depending on what state you all live in he may be able to have a a title to the house drawn up in your name that you can go to the county clerk and file as soon as he dies; that way the house would be yours. That is what my Mom did for my son. He took the title immediately to the county clerk and filed it and he did not have to pay estate taxes on it.

You two need to see a good attorney.

Really, a will does not cost that much to be assured you will be protected. Get him to have a will drawn up leaving you the house or you are going to be in bad straights if he should pre-decease you.

You never know anyone until someone dies and leaves an estate they might be able to grab.......or you divorce them.

Receipts mean nothing and you have absolutely not legal claim on the house; his relatives can evict you instantly if he dies.

You are not protected unless he leaves the house to you in his will.

Even if he just write the stuff down and leaves it to you it may not be legal in your state and if he does that he will have to sign it in front of a notary with two people to witness the signature (not you).

Answer 4

You will have no right to stay in the house after his death. The family can make you move. If he wants to be assured you get the house, he will need a will.

Most Senior Citizen centers provide free assistance in preparing a will and so does AARP.

There are will and testament forms at any large office supply store for a very reasonable cost.

Don't depend upon the good graces of his children.

Answer 5

It could be even more expensive for you if his family doesn't let you have the phone. He cannot guarantee what his family would do. You haven't articulated any reason not to get married, so that would be the first choice. If not, he really should see an estate planning attorney to make sure that his will and/or living trust protect you. You are being penny wise and pound foolish if you don't do this.

Answer 6

You could file a Will with your Attorney stating that in the event of his death the house would go to you. But to be sure, I would have him go to all the family members and attest that they would not protest the will in that event. I think a simple will like that would not cost more than $50. You should have the members of his family's' signature notarized before giving to the attorney though.The Attorney cannot notarize the signatures as that would make the Attorney a party to the agreement.

Answer 7

You might be able to have it retitled in the county for a small fee so there is joint survivorship. That way the title transfers to you if he goes. It works both ways, but it's already his home. Not sure of the cost.

But getting a will is a couple hundred bucks. Check with some senior centers in the area and see if they can recommend an inexpensive laywer.

Answer 8

Unless your state recognizes common law marriage (assuming you have met the requirements), you will not inherit anything from him unless he either (1) has a will giving you something or (2) you get married. You cannot depend on what he thinks his family will do - I will tell you right now, they will not do it.

If you dont want to get married, you should consult an estates attorney and have a short will drafted. The piece of mind will be worth the money.

Answer 9

I read a similar situation in Dear Abby in the newspaper.

Her response was that it's selfish of him not to want to marry. You will not be entitled to anything when he passes on. He can write it in the will, or you can get the house in both of your names, but in the end, it's his family's decision. If they so desire, you will never see anything left to you, in his will. They can even sell his half of the house, forcing you to move out. (As odd as it sounds, this can happen) Legally, you will only be entitled to things if you are his wife. If he really does love you, and want you cared for, then he will be willing to marry you. If he isn't, and you wish to stay in the relationship, please consult a lawyer soon. They will know what rights you would be entitled to.

Good luck.

Answer 10

Get a basic will made, leaving the house/property to you. Make it clear in the will that you get the property-no ifs ands or buts