my husband wants me to stop talking to one of my guy friends waht should i do?
2007-03-21 12:03:58 · 14 answers · asked by pinky3 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Ask yourself is this male friend more important to me than my husband? If the answer is no, you have your answer. If the answer is yes, expect the divorce papers to be issued.
My marriage is more important to me than ANY relationship with a friend of the opposite sex. But that's just me, everyone is different.
2007-03-21 12:07:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That totally depends on whether his reasons for you to stop talking to your friend is valid. If you have been friends with this guy your entire life, then it would be alittle hard to cut contact just like that. Is your husband a basically insecure person? Is he jealous about all your friendships? If the problem lies with his insecurities and this friendship means a lot to you, then you need to sit down with your husband and let him know his insecurities are getting out of hand.
If this friend is only a relatively new friend, then your husband is probably wondering why you need to be friends with another man. I believe your husband should be your love, your lover, your confidante and your best friend. If this guy is only an acquantance and your husband hasnt got control issues, then I would seriously think about your husband first. Why alow an acquaintance to come between you and your marriage...its not worth it.
You have to decide which category your husband falls into....is he a control freak?.....or is he feeling insecure for a reason, eg, are you spending more time with your friend than you are with your husband...do you talk daily to this other male friend? If that is the case, then your husband has reason to want you to stop this friendship. Maybe your husband is picking up on feelings from this other man and wants to stop it before it starts....why put temptation in the way?
I think women, more so than men, can be friends with the opposite sex, but the majority of men who want friendship with a woman usually have other thoughts in their mind....remember your husband is a man and thinks more like a man than you do.
Just decide how important this friendship is in your life and if it is worth making your marriage uncomfortable....is it worth causing a rift in your marriage?
2007-03-21 12:21:23 · answer #2 · answered by rightio 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's unfortunate that this is happening. There are several ways to go about this. Have an open conversation with your husband to find out why he wants you to stop talking to your friend. Is it out of jealousy, insecurity, fear that you'll leave him ? Perhaps talking it out and reassuring him that you aren't going to cheat on him will help. Another option would be for them to meet and get to know each other, perhaps they may also become friends, and then your husband can see that he has no reason to worry. Perhaps he may feel more comfortable if you and your friend only meet together with your husband. If none of these options work, you'll need to decide which relationship is more important--hopefully, it's your marriage. If your guy friend is a true friend, he'll understand and step out of the picture.
2007-03-25 11:35:59 · answer #3 · answered by Tweety 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Owe, that's tough. Your husband must feel threatened in some way by this other man. Does he have reason too be? I wasn't married but my last ex b/f tried to pull that crap with me and my bestie bud ever. That was the beginning of the end. But, there was absolutely no reason for him to feel threatened. My current b/f (love him) has no problem with it, and i don't have a problem with him having lunch with girlfriend (not dinner and desserts always with me) Being married is different though.....your honey's feelings should come first.
2007-03-21 12:16:01 · answer #4 · answered by sandibum 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want to stay married, STOP talking to your guy friend! I know he can't tell you what to do. I understand that. What I'm saying is that your husband has a problem with this particular guy, and has told you so. If you value your marriage I would comply with his wishes.
2007-03-21 12:08:20 · answer #5 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You would need to decide which one of these men is most important to you. I think you should respect his wishes as you would want him to respect yours. Do you talk to him when your husband isn't around? Maybe that is what he is having a problem with if you do. He might would feel better if he was included.
2007-03-21 13:19:08 · answer #6 · answered by love my life 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take a minute and think about what you really want from your marriage. Unless your freindship is completely innocent or he's gay you are going to either going to sleep with him or start confiding in him about private relationship things. Either is going to drive a wedge between you and your husband.
Men and women cannot be buddies unless the above disclaimers are true.
So what if he has girl friends? Are you cool with that? I doubt it.
2007-03-21 12:11:07 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmm that is a tough one. I have a single male friend and my honey doesn't mind that we still talk. but i or him have never given him a reason to worry. did
something happen that made him uncomfortable with the situation??? you need to have a reason. then go from there. your marriage should be first but i cant get the fact of he doesn't trust me thing. i don't know..hmmm
Good luck
2007-03-21 12:12:19 · answer #8 · answered by Orleanslady 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is obviously threatened by your relationship with this man. So that your friend is not hurt, let him know that your friendship with him bothers your husband.
2007-03-21 12:33:15 · answer #9 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
respect your husband. He is more impotent then a guy friend. There must be a reason that he doesn't want you talking to him
2007-03-21 12:10:28 · answer #10 · answered by The Voice Of Reason 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋